MIL claims baby needs meat.

[suddenlyamama]

In fact, she acts as if I don't nourish her well enough. She said to us, "You need to give her more meat, she is too small".

She is only 8 months old. Not tiny at all, except she is petite. What do I say to this? I am not confrontational at all, but this hurt my feelings. How do I explain I am feeding my baby well and that she doesn't need meat to thrive? 

The problem is that she stays overnight with MIL once a month and I am afraid she will give her meat. Do I just let her?

I don't know what to do.

[cristeen]

At 8 mos, the only thing she needs is BM or formula. Before a year, solids are just for practice regardless of composition.

If shes being this pushy at 8 mos, id rethink having the baby stay overnight. Chances are good that she does not/will not respect your choice on this matter.

[perdy]

At 8 months old? Your baby shouldn't be having meat at all.

My little guy drinks soy formula and baby food (vegi's and fruit) and he's always above 80th percentile. Even if you were planning to feed the baby meat, they generally don't start that until 9 months +.

I would keep just her informed about what your doctor says and your doctor's reco's to add size. As far as what will happen the 1 night per month, you're never going to know for sure, so all you and your husband can do is either not leave the baby or express your wishes and hope she respects them.

[McGucks]

She's going to do exactly what she feels like if you aren't there.  I agree with PP about re-thinking the overnight.  My MIL gave our nephew milk all the time even though he was allergic to milk protein, then she'd lie to SIL and BIL when he got sick from it.  My MIL won't be babysitting our LO for that and many other issues.  Your MIL's just ignorant about baby nutrition because it's all different from when she had kids.  Lotsa luck!

[elmh23]

If it makes you feel better, we are not vegetarian and my MIL still tells me I'm not nourishing our kids enough (even though they have dh's body type- skinny and long.)  I think it's just they way MIL's are. That said, I'd rethink letting your little one stay with her if you absolutly do not want her getting meat.  Chances are, your MIL will give it to her or already has.

[Bald_Bull's_Mama]

I expected a lot of flack from family members over raising my DS veg. I bought the book New Vegetarian Baby and read the entire thing. It's about nutrition and what your baby needs. When you start spouting about iron and B12 and clearly know what you are talking about, people tend to back off. For me, I ended up not even needing it! I guess just me having the nutritional knowledge, without sharing any, was enough.

[motherhendoula]

Upon hearing that i havent eaten dairy products in about a decade - My MIL was so very worried that DS  wasnt getting enough lactose.....(hes exclusively breastfed)  ...i dunno , i tend toward the critical myself but MIL just seem to have a special knack for it! 

We eat meat and i have NO plans to feed it to LO until he is a year old.  Does your DD have teeth?  How is an 8 month old supposed to eat meat?  

And lastly ...YES, my own mother gave my sisters children meat every chance she got....My sis and BIL were vegetarians at the time.  Grandma especially delighted in giving the children 'weird' meat - such as venison every time a family member went hunting etc....  My sister reasoned at least this was less processed meat.....leaving DD alone for an overnight with this woman is a nearly a guarantee that she will feed her meat and lie to you about it. 

[Shaki]

Yep I agree with PP's. Baby doesn't need anything but breastmilk or formula until she is a year. Your MIL is just plain wrong. However there's no point in trying to teach her how wrong she is. It's a double whammy: MIL and vegetarianism--don't even TRY to convince her, it will just drive you insane! Just do what you know is best and let her comments roll off of you. You can say things like "Hmm we'll think about that." and change the subject. Or "I discussed this with our ped she/he says baby is right on target nutritionally" (even if you haven't actually talked with your doc about it, you can still say this.)

As for your DC staying with your MIL, is this a needed thing? If so then you may just have to live with knowing that your babe is getting meat during those times. You could try telling your MIL that the doctor said no meat before a year--that might work. And If the sleepovers are not something that you and DH need to have MIL do, than you can decide to stop the overnights.

For what it's worth my MIL is very respectful of our parenting choices and my vegetarianism, and she STILL tried to feed my DD a huge spoonful of ground beef when DD was a baby! She didn't mean it to be disrespectful, she just wanted to share food with my DD. And meat eaters don't think meat is gross, LOL! So when she started shoving this big spoonful of meat at my little babe I was totally disgusted but she thought she was doing something nice! Different perspectives, you know? Anyway, I just calmly said "I'd prefer that she not eat meat until she's older," and MIL stopped.

Try not to sweat it too much. If it's not meat it'll be some other thing you are doing wrong. That's just the way it is sometimes with MIL's! :)