Originally Posted by waiting2bemommy
someone suggested hypnosis for me as a way to "unlock" my memories of abuse, but I'm not comfortable with that, is there anything similar that might be effective in drawing out my ds if in fact he has been abused? Of course there is still the possibility that he saw something inappropriate on TV and was acting that out (with the barbie thing). We have been to two psychologists plus a third team of people who did a forensic interview with ds when my mother called CPS on us. None of the usual methods....doll house, puppets/dolls, role playing, drawing, talking, etc have turned up anything other than a general anxiety. The anxiety is easing up a *little* now that we have a diagnosis and are adjusting our expectations of ds accordingly.
The other thing is that ds is quite the tattle teller. He will greet me when I come home from work by saying "daddy made me eat too much food, daddy didn't use the timer like he's supposed to (we use a timer for a lot of things to help him keep focus), daddy was playing rough and we're supposed to play gentle," etc. Likewise if I yell at him (my worst trait) he will tell my DP as soon as he can "Mommy was yelling and going craaaaazy Daddy!" If he has any scratch or minor injury (real or imagined) he will tattle on whoever did it (even if it was an accident). I just can't imagine that he wouldn't have said *something* to at least give me a hint of what could be going on in his head.
If anyone has any actual experience with this I would be very interested to hear how you drew your child out. I'm not ignoring the possibility that something has happened, but at this point I can push and push or I can just deal with the behaviors as they arise. I am not willing to keep putting ds through therapist after therapist until I hear what I think I should hear. All of the people he has seen came highly recommended and the forensic eval was through the children's hospital, who handles ALL the CPS cases. I'm sure they know what they are doing.
The Barbie thing totally freaked me out. I think I posted when it happened. Oh man, *I* had nightmares and flashbacks because of worrying about and hyperfocusing on it. But no one can give me a reason. Maybe there truly isn't one, maybe we will never know.
OP I wanted to address the idea of hypnosis "drawing" out memories.
I have done a lot of research into the subject due to my own hazy memories of my abuse.
From what I have read hypnosis is not a reliable or very good way to try and help remember what really took place. Just because it comes out in hypnosis in no way means it was actually real. I know that sounds scary but the findings are that often the "memories" are not really memories at all, just things you think happened. I am not saying your abuse didn't occur, I know mine did, I am just fuzzy on the details, and the important thing is to ask yourself WHY you want to know the details. As an adult what good is it going to you to know exactly what happened to you. These are questions that need to be addressed before attempting hypnosis.
In regard to your son, I can see where it would be important to know exactly what happened to your son..
I guess I am in the minority that IF BIG IF, the dog penis licking thing were an isolated incident I would actually laugh at it...I mean it's gross but if it was just one thing I wouldn't be phased. From everything else that has happened to your son though I can't say it is ok even a little bit...
I actually went through all your threads just browsing and I see a repeated pattern of you thinking other people are abusing other children. There are multiple threads where you ask if you should possibly call CPS or if it seems like there is something really wrong. You seem to be able to see a lot of issues with other adults and kids but you are blind to the fact that your son is acting out in such bizarre ways that there is a really good chance he was abused.
Just because the group of psychologists you worked with didn't find anything doesn't mean it is not there. I feel like it is easy for you to see possible abuse (based on your past posts) whereever you happen to be living but with your own child it just couldn't be true. You admit that perhaps something happened at your parent's (why was he even with them if they abused you!?) and you refuse to consider your DP could EVER do something like that. Well unfortunately I have heard many MANY stories of mamas who just couldn't ever possibly imagine someone that close to them doing something like that and then maybe months, or years later the truth comes out. I am not saying your DP did anything but YOU can never know for sure, so please don't be angry when people make suggestions to that effect.
I wish the best of luck, trouble seems to follow you like a bad habit, I hope you can find your son some help and I would scrap the therapists you have and start all over with a new one. Or multiple new ones. I would not rest until I had some answers if it was my kid.