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Good HB books for friends, mom, and me! Second HBA2C September!

post #1 of 8
Thread Starter 

Hello all.  Any recommendations?  I have two friends on the fence about hb.  One friend has had one vaginal hospital birth, got epidural at 9cm and is wanting better situation.  The other had a highly interventive first birth in hospital and two natural deliveries in hospital.  I really want these two buddies to consider HB because I believe it to be the safest option.  I am currently having my friends read Pushed and Marsden W's Childbirth in USA, they have already done the BBB video, and Ina May.  I have read so many books but not many HB specific ones.

 

And then there is my mom who will be at this HB.  I want her to be comfortable and ready, fearless.  Any suggestions? 

 

Thanks!

post #2 of 8

I don't want to hijack your thread, but I am interested in what others have to say about this also. My mother is pretty apprehensive about homebirth and I am not sure how my mother-in-law (an RN) feels because we haven't talked about it (I'm not even sure she knows that's what we're doing), but I would like them both there and I think it would be nice to get them books to "prepare them"/"get them on board".

 

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post #3 of 8

Those are good suggestions.  I think it's hard to find something that doesn't seem biased or polemic especially when you're trying to open up someone's heart who carries firmly held assumptions about birth due to their own previous experiences, especially!

 

My mom really wants to be here when I have this baby.  I'm not excited about this at all.  Mostly because I don't want to discuss my birth plans with her b/c she won't understand and I don't trust her to bring the 'right' energy to the birth experience.  Maybe I'm being unfair, but I'm trying to protect myself.

 

Anyway, I'll be curious to know what others recommend.  Maybe I'll at least suggest that my mom rent BOBB since it addresses hospital and out of hospital birth.  Hmm . . .

post #4 of 8

I really like Ina May's Guide to Childbirth for the stories and more importantly, the chapters after that discuss everything from normal physiological function to drugs. The things she says are so matter-of-fact and empowering to women! I have read the book about 6 times this pregnancy for inspiration and affirmation that my body was made to do this and that it is WONDERFULLY made to do so!

 

This is a new book coming out that may be of interest as well:

http://wisdomfrommidwives.com/

 

I prefer books that show how "normal" it is to give birth and don't exactly focus on the hospital/homebirth part of it.

post #5 of 8
Quote:
Originally Posted by labortrials View Post

 

My mom really wants to be here when I have this baby.  I'm not excited about this at all.  Mostly because I don't want to discuss my birth plans with her b/c she won't understand and I don't trust her to bring the 'right' energy to the birth experience.  Maybe I'm being unfair, but I'm trying to protect myself.

 

Anyway, I'll be curious to know what others recommend.  Maybe I'll at least suggest that my mom rent BOBB since it addresses hospital and out of hospital birth.  Hmm . . .


If you are doubting the wisdom of having your mother at the home birth, then don't have her there.  I kept my group small, only those who were absolutely necessary and blamed it on my midwife's advice so that my mom wasn't too hurt.  Like you, I wanted only the "right" energy there and it was really important towards transition when I started to doubt myself.  My mom got to be there only minutes after the baby was born, so it wasn't that big a deal overall.  I also ended up sending my 2 1/2 year old out with the paternal grandparents for the day so I could concentrate on having the baby (good decision but not planned).  You could have her nearby and then call her before the baby comes if you decide you want her - it is harder to get rid of her once she is there.

 

As far as BOBB, it doesn't end on a super positive note and could scare your mom.  There are some other videos out there that are more matter of fact about birth - one with children there- but can't remember the name.  As long as the old hair/clothing doesn't bug you, the birthing is the same if you still want to show her a video.

 

My midwife gave me all sorts of links about studies that showed HB was safe, better outcomes for baby & mom, etc.  I forwarded my mom all the links and told her my decisions were based on facts that she couldn't dispute.  I had a difficult hospital birth with #1 - every intervention available except a C-section - so her real worry was about our safety.  Once I addressed that, she was ok.
 

 

post #6 of 8

I am reading Ina Mays guide to childbirth right now, and I really love it.  Like someone else said, I like books that focus on how normal and natural the birthing process is, and that our bodies were made to do this.  Mom of 2 Boys, could you post those links that your midwife gave you here for us, if you can find them?  Thanks!

post #7 of 8

I really enjoyed The Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer. She's not shy about her opinions and is honest about it in the Introduction, but she gives a good descriptions of what can happen and what to expect in hospital, home birth, and birthing center births.

 

Reading this book and watching Orgasmic Birth convinced me and my husband to find a midwife and try for a home birth. Unfortunately we switched too late (36 weeks) and I ended up with a failed induction and c-section at 42 weeks..

 

Thinking Woman's Guide is nice because Henci does explain what steps you can take to make interventions less intrusive so they work with you and your birth plan. It looks like a lot of reading but half the book is reference.

post #8 of 8

There's a new book out, edited by a friend of mine, that is AMAZING!  There's an introduction that talks about the history of birth in America and how we've become so medicalized in our birth.  Then 25 different midwives tell their stories.  One of the endorsements if from Peggy O'Mara (previous editor of Mothering magazine).  I would definitely check it out, and if you order from the website before May 5 (National Midwives Day!) you can get it for a discount.

http://wisdomfrommidwives.com/

 

I really like Ina May's Spiritual Midwifery, but it's very "hippie" and might not be right for everyone.  I was not a fan of Birthing From Within...just didn't connect with it like I did other books, I think because of all the drawing...I'm more of a word person than a picture person.

 

 

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