Hi there. After nearly 4 incredible months with my dd, Monday will be my first day back at the office. It hurts so bad to think of leaving her with a sitter. I feel so in tuned with my dd and so honored to be her mommy. I feel like she is thriving and I am nervous that leaving her with a sitter won't be as good as what I could offer her.
I get this huge lump in my throat whenever I think about leaving her with this person we barely know...dd waking up without me there to kiss her and talk to her....me not there to nurse her, to sing to her, to make her giggle....missing so many firsts to come. And to top off my deep sadness, dd refuses to take a bottle, so I'm nervous she is going to starve herself or just scream and cry everytime the sitter tries to offer her a bottle (because this is what happens when dh offers her a bottle). I always comfort her whenever she is upset...never let her cry. She is such a calm, mellow baby and I think it is partly because I always tend to her when she makes even a peep.
I wonder if not being a SAHM will be one of my biggest regrets. I know the obvious answer, is "can you cut back and just be a SAHM?." But I do actually enjoy my work and I make nearly twice as much as dh so our hh income really depends on my contribution.
I guess, I'm just hoping that working moms will write back telling me that it is going to be OK. Would love any thoughts, tips or advice that you might have.
One Teary Eyed Mama