Frustrated and embarrassed mom of 14 month old twins starting EC

[Theresa787]

I'm a first time, stay at home mom, of girl/boy twins (14 months).  We just started EC three weeks ago (part time).  The first week, I thought this is easy.  I'm catching pees and poops.  Fast forward three weeks and I'm lucky if I can catch two pees a week!  I even try after they wake up and after they eat.  They'll sit happily on the potty with no elimination and then two minutes later I see them peeing/pooping on the floor.

We switched out of Pampers during the day, except for nap time, and we are either diaper-less or wearing cotton training pants.  I have been observing and cannot tell when they are about to pee or poop, until a couple of seconds before they eliminate (they usually just stop running around for a couple of seconds and then they pee/poop).  Then they start running again.  

If they are wearing a cotton training pant, they won't even come to me for quite some time after they eliminated.  

It seems like everyone else's kids "tell" them that they have to pee/poop or that they already went pee/poop.  Mine are content with staying in a dirty cotton training pant or just peeing/pooping on the floor.

I feel embarrassed and frustrated, because it seems like everyone else can do this.  Why can't I?

[Perdita_in_Ontario]

EC with twins! I bow down to you!

If it makes you feel any better (it should), I've been part-time ECing DS since he was 4 months (he's 13 months now) and I still don't have a clue when he's peed. I have no idea whether this is because I'm totally dense, or whether he just doesn't give signals. I go almost completely on timing - in the morning I take him every 30 minutes or so, and then that timing stretches out during the day to about every hour.

Pooping, if I'm on the ball I can tell he's working up to it - either through little toots (and the knowledge that he hasn't pooped that day or whatever) or occasionally he has pointed to the bathroom. But he's been pooping on the toilet for about 10 months now, so that's not such a miracle.

If I were you, and I'm not, I probably wouldn't go diaper-less in the house - I'd use training pants. That's what I use most of the time with DS now during the day, since he's hating diaper changes so much. One week isn't very long - EC is a journey, not a short-term race towards a goal. Without even realizing it, you'll begin to get a sense for their schedules (I can't imagine doing this with two... how would I get any computer time??). You're doing great!

[seraf]

I have not done extensive EC with twins.  I used to nanny for another young 1 year old when my son was around that age, tho.

Potty parties are an advantage with 2.  Both can sit on potties together while a story is read or whatever.  

Fun on the pot is helpful at that age.  When my DD was around that age we always sang "the itsy-bitsy spider" with a cue at every pause.  So, like, the itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout, *psssshhhh*  down came the rain and washed the spider out, *pssssshhhhh*.  She took to using the itsy bitsy spider sign to signal that she needed to pee.  Blowing raspberries is a really easy cue that she picked up and used reliably for months.  I think around 16 month she just started saying "pee," but it was hard to understand (pee?  bee?  tree?) so she soon switched to yelling "POOP!" 

Also, it's no crime if you want to start with 1 kid.  Offer both after nap time and then diaper one and training pants the other.  Watch her closely for signals and once you feel more comfortable reading her, add him in, too.  Maybe in a week, maybe in a day.  He may just get jealous watching you offer her and ask to go, too.

Most important, have fun.

[heatherr30]

I think it's perfectly normal for kids to pee at first right after they stand up from the potty!  They don't know how to relax the right muscles at the right time.  Then when they stand up and run around it jiggles their bladder and they realize they have to go!

When DD was this age I would put her on the potty first thing in the morning and right after her nap, keep her there for a few minutes (read a book or whatever), run the tap, flush the toilet, or even pee in the toilet yourself and they'll probably go.

DS is 2 months old now but often pees right after I take him off the toilet!  So if he doesn't pee on the toilet, I give him another while (you estimate how long you think it will be before they pee on the floor!) for DS that is usually 30 sec or less but for your older kids that could be longer... I talk to him and tell him how he is going to do a big pee on the toilet... then try again.  He often goes on the 2nd or 3rd try but there are still times when he pees in his diaper 2 minutes later.  It takes some time to use those muscles properly I guess!