Originally Posted by CarrieMF
Breaking the platform may have been an accident but was the actions he was doing appropriate behaviour inside a school? If he was acting as a person should be in a building then the platform/ceiling would not have been broken. It doesn't matter if he didn't know that it was not wood he was not acting appropriately in the school.
Well, I differ here (and I differ from dh, too) in that I don't see the big deal in what he was doing. I've never been in a high school where students weren't running, jumping, sliding down bannisters, etc. on a regular basis. DS1 does take it to a greater extreme than most, admittedly - partly because only a small fraction of the students are able to do the things he does. But, he does lots of things that many would consider inappropriate behaviour inside a school, and he gets positive reinforcement for a lot of it, even from teachers. (I doubt that most people would consider juggling in the hallways to be appropriate, for instance.) I really don't see why doing stunts is an issue.
In any case, the intended suspension is basically because 1) the ceiling got broken, and 2) the band teacher is pissy that he took this huge "risk" right before the musical. This isn't about his inappropriate behaviour. It's about the results, which he is perfectly willing to rectify.
Our schools have laptops for the kids. They have handles on them & the kids are supposed to use the handle to carry them. If a kid is holding it by the handle & drops it, not a big deal THAT is an accident. If the kid it holding it with 1 hand while jumping down the 2 steps from the portable, it drops & breaks then the kid is fully at fault for not acting in an appropriate manner & should be held accountable.
I'm not even sure what this has to do with the topic at hand, as nobody is suggesting that ds1 not be held accountable. We're arguing that he shouldn't be suspended. That's not the same thing. I think suspensions are stupid, and rarely an appropriate consequence/punishment and this isn't one of those times. (I have to admit that I can't imagine handing laptops over to middle school students, but to each their own.)
This kid has a part time job. He is old enough to know better than to do stunts in a school. If this kid was 6 or 7 the consequences would & should be different.
What does "old enough" have to do with anything? I wouldn't have done what he did at 6, 12 or 17. He'll probably still be doing it when he's 30. "Tricking" is in his blood, and he simply doesn't see it the same way a teacher (or dh) sees it. He does stunts - lesser ones, but stunts - every single day, both in school and out. Yes - he's taking the chance on getting hurt, whether it's on the school stairs, or the concrete curbs down the road. I just don't get where "inappropriate" comes into play.
The ones caught drinking AT the dance got 5days, the ones who were drinking BEFORE the dance(based on talking to all the girls involved) got 3 days.
Ah - gotcha. I don't get why drinking at the dance gets a bigger suspension than showing up drunk does, but I find most school policies to be pretty arbitrary that way.
Honour roll is marks based here too, but Merit awards are marks/behaviour expectations based here & that was why it came into question with these girls.
That makes sense. I don't think we really have merit awards of that type. There are citizenship awards, but I think they're based more on service work than behavioural expectations.