Advice?

[birdsanswings]

Hello ladies,

I am the mother of two boys, ages 3 1/2 & 17 months. I have had two losses in between my boys. I am currently about 5 weeks pregnant, I am unsure since I don't have a doctor.
I do not have insurance, because we are in the middle of a difficult time. This baby was a huge surprise. I had horrible experiences with doctors, and have never once had a good doctor throughout my entire life. I was treated like pure crap with both my babies, because I am a young mom. I was treated like I knew nothing about myself, or my kids. I was forced to be induced at 41 weeks with my oldest, due to the doctor not allowing women to go any later. With my second, I had elevated blood pressure at my appointment at 39.5 weeks. I was induced that afternoon. I believe my worst experiences were after the baby was born. I was placed in the double room, and both times the girls next to me were horrible obnoxious people, with obnoxious families. It was the worst experience ever, and I could hardly bond with my boys because of it.
Here is the plan, I want to have an unassisted childbirth with this baby. 
I have two options for prenatal care, and that is apply for medicaid or attempt to pay 3,200 dollars out of pocket for a midwife. The reason I am here, asking for advice is because I am O - blood type (RH negative) and my husband is B +. My boys were B +, and I had to have rhogam. Now, for an unassisted birth, how do I get rhogam? This is my biggest concern. I have read through this sight, and found the website for the supplies & I am prepared mentally but...what about this one set back? 
I know that some women don't get any prenatal care, and I don't care one way or the other, as long as I am doing what is best for my baby. I take prenatal vitamins by the way. 

I'd rather not do any of this with a doctor, but we don't know how we could afford the midwife. I had a plan to see the doctor up until the end, then claim I'd like to change doctors in order for them leave me alone...or something. But that is only if I should get a doctor.... I have no idea. I will do what is best for my baby, as I said. I am not refusing anything, just trying to figure it all out. 
 

By the way, I want suggestions for what you do with the placenta afterwards? 
I know a lot of you women do something to it, to put it into pill form or a smoothie? But what if you decide you don't want to do this? Do you throw it away?

[weliveintheforest]

Originally Posted by birdsanswings 
use I am O - blood type (RH negative) and my husband is B +. My boys were B +, and I had to have rhogam. Now, for an unassisted birth, how do I get rhogam? 

By the way, I want suggestions for what you do with the placenta afterwards? 
I know a lot of you women do something to it, to put it into pill form or a smoothie? But what if you decide you don't want to do this? Do you throw it away?

I tihnk it would be best to talk to someone in your area about the rhogam if at all possible.  In many cases you can just go into the hospital and get it.  You can check baby's blood type at home first with an eldon card, and if it's needed you go in.  The hospital will want to check for themself, and then give you the shot.  You may also be able to go to a clinic or your doctor's office, but that will depend on what is available local to you.

As for the placenta, many families bury it and plant something over it, and some just throw it away.
 

[MeepyCat]

Would it be possible to find a sympathetic midwife to do just a post-natal visit with?  (Also - order some Eldon cards.  It's possible that this baby won't be Rh+.  You need to be prepared in case s/he is, but if not, you can save yourself an errand.)

[ElizabethE]

I wonder how possible it will be to find a sympathetic midwife who will do just one visit? I had a friendly rapport with mine that lasted years, and they still didn't want to give me a postnatal visit when I expressed my intent to UC. Granted, I didn't need Rhogam, but still. And, I was covered, so they were receiving money from me. 

Birds, I would say get on medicaid and maybe have some visits with a midwife or just go in after the birth like Forest said, and hope the docs won't be total jerks about it. Also, there are some mamas here who think that Rhogam actually isn't so great, so their advice could be important to you, too.

[Caitlin0919]

I'm not Rh negative but there's a thread about Rh negative UCers literally right under this one on my subscriptions page. It looks like there are a lot of Rh negative mamas out there who are UCing so you might be able to find some advice there:

http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1287636/any-rh-negative-ucers#post_16141765

[moonfirefaery]

I don't know much about the Rhogam so I'll skip that, but for the placenta you can eat it, bury it under a tree or some flowers, freeze it, throw it out, encapsulate it, leave it on your neighbor's door step... oh, wait, that last one might not be a good idea. There are a lot of options for the placenta.

And as to what ElizabethE said, in my experience, in the US at least, it is very easy to find a MW open to UC who will do one prenatal check-up, or even a handful. I interviewed a midwife who was kind enough to check a few things, let me hear my baby on the Doppler (this was before the fetoscope would pick anything up so that was very nice!), etc. I totally second Elizabeth's suggestion.