Need help with "sharing"

[BellyBean]

I am a SAHM of a 16 month old toddler.  We get out several times a week to the library, children's museum, park etc.  I have noticed that my DD has hit the phase of only wanting what another child has.  If offered an identical toy/book/etc she wont take it and continues to grab at the other child's.  I try explaining that the other girl/boy had that and they are playing with it and redirect to "you can play with this one", but she just wont give up!  It makes me uncomfortable so I normally just move us on to the next exibit or play structure...until it starts all over again!

Any tips would be greatly appreciated. 

I have started thinking about putting her in my husband's work daycare one or two days a week so she can be around other kids more often.  We have playdates every other week or so, and the same thing seems to happen then too. 

[NEastMomma]

Hi,

My DS is 20 mos and yep, not a good sharer at all!  I recall in a grad school child psych class that children simply cannot understand or apply the concept of sharing whatsoever until about 3 yrs old.  So far this is proving true w/ DS.  I don't think daycare will make a difference as DS is in daycare for 3x/week, with a bevy of friends and still doesn't share.  None of the kids at daycare do!

I totally get that it makes you uncomfortable - it does for me too!  I love it when the other mama says something to show she "gets it."  I always try to do so when my DS is on the recv'ng end of a kid who wants what he has.

Though it may be in vain, I am trying to practice waiting turns here at home.  When he wants something I have, I try and remember to say, "Mama's turn.  Your turn in one minute."  Then I praise him for waiting while he's waiting (even if he's not waiting patiently!) and in a minute give him his turn. 

Ah, this too shall pass, I hope!  Waiting to see what some experienced mamas have to say!