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Have you told your kids, friends, family?

post #1 of 33
Thread Starter 

Hi mamas,

 

Have you spread the big news yet to friends, family, your kids?

 

I haven't told my kids, but I've told some friends.

 

What are your thoughts on breaking the big news to your kids? I'm holding off on telling my kids until I'm a little further along. I'm 9 weeks now. They would be heartbroken if I were to have a MC.

 

Thanks

post #2 of 33

I didnt tell my kids, I simply forgot my 8 year old could read and left a post-visit report out on the table.  SO, we didnt have to tell anyone our kids have told EVERYone we have seen in the last week- even though I asked them not to.  Im only 7 weeks, and I really did NOT want them and everyone else knowing until 12 weeks- but I guess things just happen.  This is my 3rd, and I assume I will be showing a bit before 12 weeks.  It might be pretty hard to hide by then anyways.

post #3 of 33

I've already told everyone..  I had to tell my IL's because the week after we found out we all went on a sailing trip together.  They would have guessed asap since I'm no longer drinking alcohol (not that I drank that much, but I certainly would have on vacation). 

 

My 7year old isn't really a 'sharer' of this kind of information.  I don't think he's really told anyone, maybe it hasn't really sunk in yet for him.

 

Oh, and there's no way I could keep a pregnancy secret for very long.  I'm only 8 week and I've already gained enough weight that my regular pants don't fit. 

post #4 of 33

We were going to wait until I was farther along- like 9 or 10 weeks to tell dd (who is 4), but somehow she knew something was happening.  She came up to me, lifted up my shirt, and patted my tummy.  Then she said, "wouldn't it be fun if there was a baby in there again?"  I was floored!  We hadn't so much as slipped up saying the words baby or pregnant in front of her!  So we ended up telling her the next day that she was right and there was a baby in there.

 

We told our parents right away b/c they would have been upset if we didn't.  We've told closer friends, neighbors, etc. that I need to get support from.  I feel less worried about telling people since I have always m/c within the first 5 weeks and I'm 7 now.  But I won't announce it on FaceBook or anything yet.  :)

post #5 of 33

I don't tell anyone irl until I'm well out of my 1st trimester (besides DH of course) because I've had multiple miscarriages and I don't like everyone to know/worry.  I never start to show until right around 20 weeks and so I am thinking of waiting until then this time--but it will be hard to keep quiet!!  We will see! 

post #6 of 33

I told my kids right away when I found out at 4 weeks. They would be sad if I miscarried, but they would be terrified if I was weeping, bleeding profusely, and cramping in pain and they didn't know why!  (That's how it was for me when I miscarried before.)  Since I could not hide a miscarriage, I might as well not hide the pregnancy.   smile.gif

 

I told my sisters and a couple of friends right away too, but I wanted to wait to tell everybody on Facebook.  For a long time, maybe months.  I have an 18 month old and most people knew we were done having kids... I just didn't want to hear the "OMG!"s and the "WOW..."s  Which we got after my close friend let it slip in a reply, after I said I was tired. So oh well, everyone knows now.

 

post #7 of 33
I would not feel right about telling anyone before my son. So I told my best friend rigt away, my bf and classmates the next day, and my son and family at our family gathering a week and a half later. I still have not told anyone at work, and I my belly is beginning to grow, so I am trying to decide when and how to do that
post #8 of 33
Thread Starter 

Thanks for the feedback.

 

I'm already starting to show--this is my third, and I'm petite, short waisted, and built like a boy, so the belly is starting to pop out a little. 

I feel bad not telling my kids, before I told my friends, but I think we're going to tell them this week. They will be thrilled. My parents know, my DH's family doesn't know. So we'll slowly but surely spread the news over the next few weeks. 

 

thanks again.

post #9 of 33

We told everybody at 5 weeks. I wanted to wait until 8 weeks, but we wanted a blood test run and I had to take my 3 girls with me. No way the oldest wouldn't have caught on.

post #10 of 33

I told my fiance when I found out (at about 4 weeks) and then we told a couple of really good friends a couple of days later. I've told the IMPORTANT members of my family, but we haven't told his family yet. We're waiting to tell his family until I get back to him (I came home to tell my family.) After we tell his family, I suppose I'll slowly start telling other friends over the next couple of weeks. I'm starting to show a little, so we're going to have to tell his family soon....

post #11 of 33

I had only told my DH and MW, but I told my 4 yo DD today. I have an appointment with my MW tomorrow, and she would've figured it out. I told her I had an appointment with Ms. D, and she asked why. I said "Well, why do we go see her? What does she do?" and DD said "She helps people get babies out of their - ARE YOU PREGNANT?!?!" She asked 3 or 4 times before she believed me and then said, with a huge grin, "Congratulations!" joy.gif Love that kid.

 

Since DD is super excited and won't be able to keep her mouth shut, I'll probably call our families tomorrow after my appointment, and then DD will start telling everyone we know locally, I'm sure.

post #12 of 33

As soon as I refuse a glass of wine, my friends and family know.  Not that I'm an alcoholic or anything but it's just too obvious and I'm bad at lying so I just told them.  I'm a teacher, though and hoping to get to June without telling all of my students.  We'll see though.  I'd rather people thought I was pregnant than developing a pot belly.  We shall see how it goes.  My son is 11 months old so I tell him about it all the time...not that he knows what I'm talking about!!  I have also informed my dogs and they are very excited about a new sibling to protect :)

post #13 of 33

I told my two best friends but that's it which is weird for me because normally I don't tell anyone until I've told my mom. But with all the cramping and spotting I just don't want to drag my mom (or anyone else) through this too. I want to wait until 12 weeks but it is getting pretty hard so I might tell my kids and family at about 10/11 and facebook @ 12/13. Normally I don't tell my kids until the third tri or later but they are older now so I'll probably just tell them. As observant as my kids are, they are blessedly baby-blind. Never even occurs to them.

post #14 of 33

I've told a few people at work (they are OBs, midwives and one close nurse friend).  I haven't told any of my close family or friends.  I just had a loss in the fall and found that the people who knew I was pregnant early on and then found out about my mc didn't seem as supportive as I would have liked (they didn't have kids either, making it harder for them to understand the loss and grief I experienced).  I feel lucky to have my DDC here on Mothering.com.  It's been a great place to come for support.  I won't tell my family until after my nuchal scan (after 12 weeks).  My mom will be so excited and I don't want to tell them I'm pregnant only to lose the babies.  My mom will go crazy when she finds out because she also had twins (my brothers).

post #15 of 33

I'm really struggling with this this time around.  Last time we told at 9 weeks because we got an ultrasound and the tech was really positive about how great everything looked and said we could tell people.  Everything went great, so no regrets.  My husband has a really hard time keeping a secret that he's excited about so he's already told several people "confidentially."  I told him he might as well make an announcement because people are going to start hearing it from those people.  I've only told a tiny handful of very close friends/family.

 

I thought we'd be telling people this week as we had an ultrasound and I thought I was 10-11 weeks, but I'm only 8 weeks!  We saw a good heartbeat (160bpm) and everything looked good, but the tech was an hour late and in a big hurry once she got to us so I didn't get that super warm fuzzy confident feeling.  I'm definitely going to wait until 12 weeks to make the big announcement on facebook, but I really don't think I can wait that long to tell others.  Especially because I've been so nauseous and late to work in the morning, and I'm already out of my pre-pregnancy pants this time around.


We are fortunate not to have experienced any miscarriages, but it is so hard not to be a bit nervous during the first trimester!

post #16 of 33
Quote:

Originally Posted by mamabelle View Post

I thought we'd be telling people this week as we had an ultrasound and I thought I was 10-11 weeks, but I'm only 8 weeks! 


Oh that's so frustrating to be behind what you thought!  That happened to me with my first b/c I didn't understand the pregnancy week counting.  I thought I was 10 weeks and I was only 9.  I cried right there in the birth center b/c I knew that meant I was farther away from the hope of the second tri where I assumed I would no longer have morning sickness.

 

post #17 of 33

We told everyone on April 1st, at 6 weeks.  Could've waited another week, but we thought it would be fun to tell them then, and it was.  :-)  I always tell people early, as my morning sickness gets really bad, and I need to be able to be honest with my friends and coworkers when I'm having a bad day, you know?  Also, I figure the more people praying and thinking good thoughts for baby, the better.  :-)

 

Our 8 year old didn't want to believe us, since we told her on April Fool's Day, but by the next day, she believed us.  Our 5 year old was immediately excited, and declared that God has decided it's another girl.  Our 1 year old, well, she gets excited whenever she sees a baby in a book or on tv, so I'm hopeful that she'll love this baby loads when s/he arrives!  (my other kiddos are 3.5 years apart, this will be the closest at 2y3m, I am nervous!)

post #18 of 33

I told everyone on April Fool's day too.  It was hilarious to watch everyone to question whether or not I was really pregnant..  ROTFLMAO.gif
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by rachdoll View Post

We told everyone on April 1st, at 6 weeks.  Could've waited another week, but we thought it would be fun to tell them then, and it was.  :-)  I always tell people early, as my morning sickness gets really bad, and I need to be able to be honest with my friends and coworkers when I'm having a bad day, you know?  Also, I figure the more people praying and thinking good thoughts for baby, the better.  :-)

 

Our 8 year old didn't want to believe us, since we told her on April Fool's Day, but by the next day, she believed us.  Our 5 year old was immediately excited, and declared that God has decided it's another girl.  Our 1 year old, well, she gets excited whenever she sees a baby in a book or on tv, so I'm hopeful that she'll love this baby loads when s/he arrives!  (my other kiddos are 3.5 years apart, this will be the closest at 2y3m, I am nervous!)



 

post #19 of 33
Quote:
Originally Posted by rachdoll View Post

We told everyone on April 1st, at 6 weeks.  Could've waited another week, but we thought it would be fun to tell them then, and it was.  :-) 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Abraisme View Post

I told everyone on April Fool's day too.  It was hilarious to watch everyone to question whether or not I was really pregnant..  ROTFLMAO.gif
 

 

We were going to do this, too, but decided against it.  We ended up telling the day after April Fool's and my in-laws thought we had gotten the day wrong!  So they were like, "um, April Fool's was yesterday!"  And we responded with, "yes, exactly."  Then they got it.  Sigh...

post #20 of 33

I'm trying my hardest to not tell anyone until the end of the first trimester, but it's not going to happen. I'm 7 weeks now and I've told my two closest friends and my ex-stepmom and my area moms group. Waiting to tell my dad...! This is number 3 for us and I'm pretty sure everyone thought 2 was it. I had a miscarriage in between DD and DS at 7 weeks so this is a scary week and I'll probably tell more people past this week, but that pregnancy felt very, very different from this one. 

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