My DS (6y.o.) has received a dx of Asperger's and Anxiety Disorder NOS via a private psychological assessment that we pursued. However, we are not absolutely confident that these diagnoses are correct (primarily because the Asperger's criteria do not seem to be met consistently) and are getting a 2nd opinion. One of our concerns is that our DS does not currently show any concerning behaviors at school; he does misinterpret social situations and can get very upset and anxious, but he holds it together until he gets home. He used to show some difficulty tolerating changes in routine at school and did not play with others much, but he is doing better with these and his current teacher has absolutely no concerns. The primary reason we had the assessment done was related to explosive outbursts at home (which are severe, but periodic in nature and appear to coincide with increased stressors outside the home).
I wonder how wise it is to disclose these diagnoses to the school (and the community at large I suppose) when he appears to everyone in those environments to be managing well (although of course we do have the impact at home depending on how he is dealing with stressors in other environments). I am particularly concerned because once you disclose a diagnosis, there's really no way to take that back... and I wonder if he will even truly meet the diagnostic criteria in the future.
The funny thing is that I work with kids with a wide variety of diagnoses and I actually encourage parents to seek out evaluations to get the correct "labels" for their child so that they can receive the supports that they need in order to succeed. Yet here I am, feeling very conflicted about whether it is in his best interests to share the information...
Any thoughts or personal experience?