salut everyone! i've been lurking for a few days and am just getting around posting. merci bien for starting the thread, sara!
you all have such adorable wee ones! i keep dragging DP over to the computer to show her the cute gaybies. i hope we'll eventually have our own pics to share....
i'm going to answer the QOTD about terrible dates, as my baby poop experiences are limited to things that happened decades ago with my much younger siblings, (and i tend to have first dates that are either sublime or monumentally bad)
this is one of the monumentally bad experiences:
so i connected with this woman online, and she seemed really cool and interesting. she was an attorney working for native american rights, and i could feel her passion for her work in the pre-date phone conversations we had. passion is usually very attractive to me, as is activism, so i was sure we'd hit it off in person. for the date she took me to a restaurant in DC where the waitstaff gets on a small stage and sings when they aren't taking orders or serving food. the woman seemed very nice, and we were indeed getting along; however, i realized fairly quickly that i wasn't attracted to her. apparently, the non-attraction wasn't mutual, because when our waiter came to bring us our food, she asked him if *she* could get on the stage and sing to me. now don't get me wrong, a heartfelt serenade from the right person can lead to melty-legged giddiness. but i'd known this woman for all of 20 minutes, and i just wasn't interested in that way. (not to mention the fact that i can be incredibly shy and being sung to in a restaurant full of strangers would be a kind of personal hell) luckily, the dating deities heard my desperate prayers, and the waiter explained that it was impossible for anyone beside the staff to use the stage. PHEW!
after the meal, she asked me if i could drive her home. being a nice southern girl, i of course said "yes" and she followed me to my jeep. when we got inside, she leaned over from the passenger seat, grabbed the front of my shirt and planted a huge, sloppy, tongue-filled kiss on me. once i'd toweled off my chin, cheeks and eyebrows, i drove her home. i was still feeling very awkward when we pulled up near her apartment complex, but i was also feeling relieved that the whole thing was almost over.... unfortunately, i was very very wrong. before she got out of the car, she said that since she couldn't sing to me in the restaurant, she was going to do it then and there. she also told me to ignore the gender of all of the pronouns in the song. what followed was something along the lines of "i'm loving him more and more every day. he's my world and i want him so much" okay, whatever.... i dropped her off and went home to my happily empty bed.
but it wasn't over yet, because at the restaurant, before she'd started waving the crazy flag, she'd invited me to go to anapolois with her the next day, and i'd invited her to come to a party i was having that night. so i found myself with her again less than 12 hours later. on the drive to anapolis, i was racking my brains trying to figure out how i could tell her i wasn't interested. i'm terrible at that kind of thing. much to my relief, she made things a lot easier by saying, "i have to tell you something....i'm married." i wanted to scream hallelujah, but i restrained myself, and calmly told her that i couldn't date someone who was married. she seemed disapointed but nodded and then went on to tell me that her husband could only get sexually excited when he hurt her. she also offered me some of her stash of medication (xanax, ritalin and percocet to name a few). the trip to anapolis was okay and at times even interesting (she took me to see a spirit guide), but she kept trying to buy me things. we parted for the second time, and i went home to prepare for my party (forgetting completely that she was going to be attending). an hour before things were supposed to begin, my doorbell rang, and guess who it was. i was still in the middle of frantically cleaning, so it kept me from really having to interact with her. two of my friends from out of town showed up soon after that, and thankfully she switched her energies to them.... once the party got into full swing i forgot about her for the most part, but from time to time, i'd look in her direction. every single time she was in someone's lap acting very flirty. she tried to kiss one of my gay friends and apparently kissed and felt up several of the straight guys and girls. at around 2am she handed me her cell phone and said "give him directions to your place." when i asked her who "he" was she said, "my husband."
so there you go... my "worst" date ever. although, by the end i was just laughing at the absurdity of it all and thinking how it would make a great story someday.