I am just curious...DH and I were having this discussion last night in relation to my own childhood which was very chaotic. By chaotic I mean, not stable....parents fighting etc. moving a lot (a biggie for me, I endured many midnight moves). Being around "bad" people, being a pawn in divorce (as a child). I mean the list could be endless because there are many ways for a child's life to be chaotic. My opinion last night was that, yes, a chaotic childhood can be "abuse" (not in the literal sense, like SA or being beaten etc. I dealt with SA as a kid so I know there is a difference and really don't want to offend/upset anyone!) if that child grows up and is dealing with things that happened in childhood that have changed/impacted them in ways that wouldn't have happened had it not been for the chaos in their lives.
DH wasn't so much in agreement on this point so I was just curious how other people felt about it. I guess having lived a very turbulent/chaotic/dysfunctional (whatever) childhood I feel more strongly about it than DH...At the same time I feel like the word abuse suggests a specific person doing "things" to a child (childhood abuse, I understand there is abuse aimed at adults as well) instead of an overall climate of chaos, danger, instability etc... I am confused about how I feel about it and justed to hear what other people think about it.
Please forgive if I didn't word things right, or upset someone. I am muddling through these feelings as I type so it is hard to be coherent and articulate all the time.