Is it ok to ask people to bring a plate/cup to a party? - Page 2

[Shaki]

As a guest I would think it was weird and a hassle to bring my own plate. Especially because if you are talking about a toddler party it would be a full table setting for me and my child and possibly my spouse, plus diaper bag, and gift (or donation). That's a LOT to haul to a party. I agree with the suggestions to invest in some non breakable dishes for parties and stuff. You can get metal dishes from a camping supply store if you don't want plastic...

As for the instead of gifts please bring dipes to donate to the local shelter, I've got no problem with that. In fact we just went to a party where that's what they asked for and everyone happily complied.

ETA: I don't think people will care about no pop. Juice and sparkling water are the norm around here.

[obscureepiphany]

when we have get-togethers, we often make iced tea. It seems to go over well as a soda substitute.

[chel]

I'm fairly crunchy and would probably bring paper plates.

Ikea has some cute plastic kid dishes that comes in a 6 pack

[SweetSilver]

THRIFT STORE.

[akat]

We also have a box of inexpensive plates and stuff that we keep in the basement.  Now that we have kids, we host parties and family get-togethers a lot more often, so we get lots of use out of them.  In addition to using them at parties, your kids and their friends can use them as preschoolers and you won't have to worry about them breaking your regular stuff.  I actually built my collection over the course of a couple of parties, buying the big plates one time, dessert plates another time, etc.

[belltree]

We've done this for our beach wedding picknick. We just wrote, that we are young and don't have a large household (nor want to store tons of cheap party plates), and want to have a green simple get together with our best friends and family. Noone was offended, and actually some people copied the idea, also now the host has to do less dishes.

[HeckedyPeg]

I don't think it would be a strange request if it were a potluck or even a picnic in a location other than your home, but since you're hosting you should probably provide plates, cups, and utensils. To echo many PP, I would either use my everyday stuff or have a special stash of cheap plates just for parties/bbqs. 

You can make juice fizzies instead of soda- just combine fruit juice with sparkling water. Fruit juice is still sugary, but it's a better alternative to soda, and it's really diluted this way. 

Also, if you have to buy temporary, check out this website, many of their products are fully compostable! http://www.biodegradablestore.com/index.html

[JudiAU]

I think there are better green options than asking all of your guests to remember a cup and plate. Sounds kind  of annoying/bulky/one more thing to forget and for a mainstream crowd might seem like the hippy version of ostentatious. “Look at me…I am not wasteful like you” Also, I really think providing dishware is part of your role as a host just like providing food and beverages and activities.

Considering buying or thrifting an expensive set of dishes for parties, using some of the more expensive but reusable green plastic plates, or borrowing dishes from someone. If your party is very large you could also rent them.

[JudiAU]

I just read the rest of the request.

I'd consider the plate/cup request combined with the food bank request really over the top. They are your guests and should be treated as such.

I don't think it is okay to request specific gifts, even if it is for charity. Gifts shouldn't come into play at all in an invitiaton. If you don't want gifts, I think that is okay to state but you shouldn't be redirecting the gift-giving dollars as if you own them. Also, stating that they are already getting fits from other people (you know, the important people) really makes the partygoer feel second class.

[belltree]

Regarding the gifts - why not ask for secondhand things or hand-me-downs?

I guess, what I am taking from the responses here, is that you can very well ask people to bring plates and cups, but that some people will find it strange and some might even be offended. It is up to you, if you can live with that, or if you could for instance just ask relatives to bring some cups and plates over, so you have enough to serve everyone. Maybe you could even ask a friend to help with the cleanup instead of bringing a gift.

[Amanda1]

Originally Posted by HeckedyPeg 

You can make juice fizzies instead of soda- just combine fruit juice with sparkling water. Fruit juice is still sugary, but it's a better alternative to soda, and it's really diluted this way. 

Also, if you have to buy temporary, check out this website, many of their products are fully compostable! http://www.biodegradablestore.com/index.html

This is a great site! I had thought about buying compostable stuff but its just so freaking expensive!!! but these prices are great. I will order these.

I know lots of people suggested buying a supply of of stuff just to use for parties, which is also a great idea, but we are having a pretty big party this year and that would be a lot to buy right now...but a great idea none the less.

I think for drinks I will do iced tea and fizzy juice, I do know some people will look for pop ( i have friends who give their 4 year old coke nearly every day!!!!!!!) but I am not worried about them missing it, maybe they will realise there is better options!

As for gifts I like the option of asking for previously loved things but its also  a matter of space for us and people would probably end up buying new anyways. Same with asking for no gifts, they will want to bring something instead of showing up empty handed.

I am sure that with the group of friends that are coming they will be more than ok with bringing a donation, and even though I am going to allow family ( grandparents,aunts and uncles) to buy him a gift I wont be making that public knowledge...we will just be opening them after.

The thing I am wondering now is if people do bring gifts anyways (which may happen) do we open them at the party? I think the people who brought a donation may be uncomfortable with that, but the people who brought a gift will want him to open it?

Thanks again for all your ideas!!!!

[crunchy_mommy]

Originally Posted by Amanda1 

The thing I am wondering now is if people do bring gifts anyways (which may happen) do we open them at the party? I think the people who brought a donation may be uncomfortable with that, but the people who brought a gift will want him to open it?

No -- I'd put the gifts in another room so the other guests don't feel bad, and open them after everyone leaves. Although I did this with DS's party and then realized EVERYONE had brought a gift (despite my "no gifts") so I just pulled them out & let him open them in front of everyone.

[creddy]

Originally Posted by akat 

We also have a box of inexpensive plates and stuff that we keep in the basement.  Now that we have kids, we host parties and family get-togethers a lot more often, so we get lots of use out of them.  In addition to using them at parties, your kids and their friends can use them as preschoolers and you won't have to worry about them breaking your regular stuff.  I actually built my collection over the course of a couple of parties, buying the big plates one time, dessert plates another time, etc.

This was mentioned many times in PP, but I'd advise to be VERY deliberate with signs and separate trash bins.  I tried this once for a big party, and had a separate "trash" set up and everything, but alas, people STILL threw them out - so frustrating. They were even the fancy, clear, sturdy "cut glass" look ones like THESE :-(  So just be very obvious with signs, etc :-)