Birds do it... Bees do it... even Ladies in their Forties do it.... 40+++ Spring TTC - Page 3

[Kristin0105]

Stevi I am ever hopeful. At this point if I get pregnant my dd would be after my 46th birthday. I am not sure what my cut off is for me to decide to move on to donor embryo's or throw in the towel altogether. I am an optimist so it's hard to finally say okay this is not working move on. So I plug on looking for a miracle or at least some stories to make me think it's possible.

[Stevi]

I would totally not say no top donor eggs! Unfortunately, I do not have the finances for any sort of medical intervention, and possibly never will.

[Shelley71]

Ok, I'll admit I'm x-posting this from the ONE THREAD because I want as many opinions as possible. I'm VERY confused.

So, I took my temp for the first time since the after the surgery and now all the sudden FF has me Oing TEN DAYS AGO!!

I don't think I trust this! I almost tested this morning because AF should have been here on Friday, but she's a no show. I feel NOTHING right now, and I would be 10dpo. I also temped this morning just so I could decide whether or not I should waste a test. If my temp was higher than it had been, I would have tested, but it wasn't. We BARELY BD'd during this time, but got one in two days prior to this "O".

Would you test tomorrow or not? I don't want to get my hopes up, because I had already decided I wasn't Oing, and even managed to get myself referred to an RE. I don't want to see a BFN - two were enough last Monday!

WWYD??

[Karalina]

Hey all- got my Goddess from Litmama!! thankyou!!! and btw-- sending you love that you had some tough days--

Gumblossom- who's to say a little spremie can't swim right in at the right time before November??? WHOOPS!!!!!!

Love all you girls-

[Shelley71]

Not so fast for me. FF took away the O when I entered my temp this morning. Still no AF, so I'm clueless. I'll test Wednesday if she still doesn't show, but I know it'll be a BFN.  Can't get PG without an egg.

[WaturMama]

I'm stopping by to say I am amazed by the number of women in their 40s in my DDC. They just keep popping up! I keep being surprised I don't know them from this thread. There are at least 6 of us. That is so hopeful to me.

Shelley, I took a look at your chart. I have done my own charting for at least a decade. I think it is such a matter of seeing patterns which sometimes FF seems to be good at and sometimes not. Do you know typically what your pre ovulation and post ovulation temps are? That can be helpful for me. Also what can be helpful for me is adjusting for the time I take the temp--according to Toni Weschler's Taking Charge of Your Fertility it generally goes up about 0.2 degrees each hour. That works well for me. When I look at that chart, my guess is that you have not ovulated. Your temp seems to be bouncing around the same bunch of low temps, but looking at those two things I mentioned could change my opinion. I think if you compare your charts and this one, you'll know best. It makes sense that your body might delay ovulation after a surgery while you get your energy back. That doesn't seem worrisome, just your body taking care of itself and making sure it is ready for any pregnancy. I hope that is helpful.

[music.mama.pdx]

All....I rarely post but often lurk. I wanted to share my shock and joy. I got my BFP this morning at 14DPO. I turned 45 the morning I conceived. Who knows if it will stick but wow, wow, wow.iu

Can anyone suggest a good pregnancy site, beyond this one? Hoping to find one that has support for 40+ moms. It's been 17 years since I've donie this! :-)

[WaturMama]

That is such wonderful news, music.mama.pdx!!! What an awesome birthday present. Sending lots of good sticky birthday babe wishes!!!

I'll be curious what folks say about pregnancy sites. As I posted earlier there are a surprising number of expecting mamas in their 40s in my Dec DDC here. I am the oldest at 44 though, and that is bizarre to me.

[beachlover]

Wow Congrats Music.mama..... that's exciting news! Hope it's a sticky bean in there.

Lotus1 your beta level was great!!

AFM 9 dpo. Not much to report. I have a  strong metallic taste this month, but don't know if it's because I've been more faithful about taking my prenatals instead of just folic acid. My CM is sort of dry though and that doesn't seem like a good sign as I usually get that wet feeling if I'm pregnant. 

Waturmama I'm not  that surprised by the women in their 40s. I really think up until 42 or so, it's still very common to conceive, it's just so few actually try. I had my last little one at just a few weeks shy of 42 and know many others who have as well.  It does seem at 44 or 45 it gets a lot tougher. I do wish I knew why I seem to conceive so easily but keep m/c. I mean is it just old eggs? I've never had these issues before and so I really think that perhaps that's it. If it is that, I keep thinking, well there's got to be one good one left in there...lol. But then I keep wondering if it is just my hormone levels aren't right to sustain pregnancy anymore. Yet the totally normal 28 days cycles with 14 day LP make me think that's not it either. Anyways sorry to ramble. When is your u/s?

[Stevi]

Music.mama.pdx...   CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!

[gumblossom]

Congratulations Music.mama, I hope this is a sticky bean for you.

Beachlover, it does sound like your cycle is fine.Have you had any testing done for recurrent miscarriage? Could it be a clotting issue perhaps?It sounds like your hormones are fine.Do you get spotting your LP? A 14 day LP is really good.

My naturopath suggested that I maybe miscarried because of progesterone deficiency, but it was obvious to me that she had no real basis for  saying that. I had a 12 day Lp (which she suggested was borderline) and I miscarried at 10 weeks (but baby died at 8), I also had an ovarian cyst which would have produced a lot of progesterone.So I am inclined to think the naturopath really didn't know.

My doctor suggested it was probably bad luck and old eggs. He said I had a 40% chance of miscarrying whereas younger women have a 25% chance. Ironically, though, after I had the ultrasound at 8weeks 1 day, I read on the net that seeing a healthy heartbeat at 8 weeks gave me  a 2-5% chance of miscarrying.I sometimes wonder if I maybe got an infection or something, but there is no way of knowing and I just have to accept that it is common in our age group.

I think if it is down to old eggs, then there will definitely be one more good one in there. And as Randine Lewis says - we can give ourselves a better chance by working on getting better eggs.

I don't know if I will be ttc this cycle. DH and I haven't discussed it again and I kind of feel it is up to him to bring it up if he has a change of heart, mainly because he knows exactly what I want and unless he changes his mind I don't think anything I say will make a difference. I'm really torn - I could probably use my imagination and manage to get a few stray spermies in the right place at the right time, but I'm not sure if I can do it. More than anything I want him to be on the same page, or at least close to it.But then again, he did say November, so I suppose there is some room for negotiation.

We went to a friend's place last night for dinner. They have a 9 week old baby boy.He is gorgeous - very relaxed and chubby. When we got there he started crying and my DH picked him up and cuddled him for ages. It was so bittersweet. SO lovely to see him like that, but I felt so cheated that I'm not 27 weeks pregnant and looking forward to our baby in 3 months time. I still hope I'll be pregnant when my due date comes around.I think it might help me get through it.

[contactmaya]

JUST A QUICK HELLO EVERYONE, AND......CONGRATULATIONS MAMA.MUSIC   AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME, MAY IT STICK FOR 9 MONTHS.

WATURMAMA, WEIRD BEING THE OLDEST ISNT IT, ITS ALL SO RELATIVE.

[Kristin0105]

Waturmama thanks for stopping by and letting us know about the over 40's women in your ddc how exciting. And a little frustrating, I want it to be me too!!!!! LOL

Music.mama.pdx...   CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!

Can I add you to our BFP's list? not sure why this is in bold I seem to be having formating issues.

Gumblossom hang in there perhaps you'll have a happy accident or holes in your condoms LOL

[WaturMama]

Originally Posted by beachlover 

Waturmama I'm not  that surprised by the women in their 40s. I really think up until 42 or so, it's still very common to conceive, it's just so few actually try. I had my last little one at just a few weeks shy of 42 and know many others who have as well.  It does seem at 44 or 45 it gets a lot tougher. I do wish I knew why I seem to conceive so easily but keep m/c. I mean is it just old eggs? I've never had these issues before and so I really think that perhaps that's it. If it is that, I keep thinking, well there's got to be one good one left in there...lol. But then I keep wondering if it is just my hormone levels aren't right to sustain pregnancy anymore. Yet the totally normal 28 days cycles with 14 day LP make me think that's not it either. Anyways sorry to ramble. When is your u/s?

I think it is the old eggs, especially if you didn't have trouble before. Same for me. From my understanding with those numbers the hormone levels are fine. (I have similar, but I also did those blood tests, early in the cycle at some point and they came out well.)

My ultrasound is tomorrow, late morning. Send good thoughts everyone! The last 2 times I had the 1st u/s of a pregnancy things didn't turn out well, so it is nervewracking. But the time before that it was great, so I can have happy ultrasounds...it is possible. I'm 7w1d today.

[Stevi]

Waturmama...   I am currently taking DHEA as I read that it can help rejuvenate old eggs. I hope that this info is unecessary for you!

Have a Reproductive Day!

Edited by Stevi - 4/27/11 at 10:54am

[saoirse2007]

 

Originally Posted by WaturMama 

I think it is the old eggs, especially if you didn't have trouble before. Same for me. From my understanding with those numbers the hormone levels are fine. (I have similar, but I also did those blood tests, early in the cycle at some point and they came out well.)

My ultrasound is tomorrow, late morning. Send good thoughts everyone! The last 2 times I had the 1st u/s of a pregnancy things didn't turn out well, so it is nervewracking. But the time before that it was great, so I can have happy ultrasounds...it is possible. I'm 7w1d today.

 

[WaturMama]

Saoirse, I love love love that!!! Thank you!!

Stevi, I think when I did look into it there were some things about it that concerned me. I don't remember what though. I've been doing a lot of things including working with a TCM person to work on egg quality. My understanding is that TCM is the best thing we can do to work on egg quality. And yes, hopefully that information will be unnecessary.

[SpiralChrissy]

Exciting to hear the successes around here! Good luck to those who are pregnant. I wish you all the best. It was great o see the list that you posted, Kristin0105. That was very encouraging as I am about to enter the 40+ club. I believe that believing it is possible helps make it possible, so seeing that post and hearing from you mamas, is very encouraging!!!

Gumblossom- I totally relate to what you're saying about the Secret, the Power and the Law of Attraction. In one of my Buddhist books, it was also talking about this idea of giving out what you want back. So, I was thinking about that an parenting. It seems like if I want another, then my focus should be on being nurturing with those around me. If I love and mother those in my life, perhaps that will bring more mothering opportunities into my life? I'm trying too to be extra loving with my DH to pave the way.

I've proposed the contract and we've talked about it but he hasn't actually read it yet. It's a bit maddening. DH said he wants to collect his thoughts first and write as well. He wants to write about how he's feeling and be sure that I know exactly how much feels like he'll be "sacrificing" to expand our family. I do believe, my mama friends, that I am well aware at this point about what he feels he's giving up. My silly, DH! But, I know it's important for him to feel fully heard. So, I'm being patient. He probably can't write it out until this weekend. I'll give it til Monday and hope we can get this thing signed and really focus on TTC instead of all this half trying. I do believe that we're moving in the right direction.

In the meantime, I'm off to the library to get some books on conception and popping a Vitex before I head out the door.

Good luck everyone!

SpiralChrissy

[Kristin0105]

Too bad your DH can't know ahead of time how much he will be gaining should you add a sweetie to the family. These life changing decisions can be hard. I had a therapist tell me once that when I was ready to have a baby it would need to be an "oops" because if I waited until my DH thought it was a good time it would never happen. LOL

Waturmama sending you some very happy u/s thoughts. Will be looking for your update. I hope all goes well.

[beachlover]

Waturmama, I'm thinking of you!!!!!!!! Praying you saw/will see a healthy bean today:-)