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Mothering › Mothering Forums › Archives › Pregnancy and Birth Archives › Due Date Clubs 2009 - 2012 › May 2011 › The stupid/rude/obnoxious things people can say because you are pregnant thread
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The stupid/rude/obnoxious things people can say because you are pregnant thread

post #1 of 49
Thread Starter 

"Wow, are you about to pop?"/ "Any day now, huh?"  me: no, I have a month still   "Oh, you look huge!"

 

Also:  "You look so done"  and "Look, I think you're waddling!"

 

And DH: "I can't wait for you to not be pregnant so you can be all hot again"

 

Really, these types of comments are not appropriate if someone is obese or sick or has bad skin, etc so why is my body free game for stupid people's comments?

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

post #2 of 49

The guy at the car lot I park at for work, daily for the past few months: "Should you be driving? You're scaring me!" Umm... ok.

 

Pretty much everyone: "Bet you're ready to be done huh?" Yeah, cause you reminding me makes me even more ready, jerks.

 

My boss for the last few months, every time I make a noise while moving or express any kind of preggo discomfort in his office: "Don't have a baby in my office!" I am tempted to hide a water ballon in my pants one of these days and pop it while sitting on his couch. 

 

post #3 of 49

Pretty much anything anyone says irritates me right now... doesn't matter if it has something to do with me or if they're commenting on the weather, I'm just plain irritable. LOL  Thankfully I haven't had anyone making rude comments... maybe I have a mean look on my face and they're afraid to say anything, because a few WEEKS ago, people kept saying, "Any day now, huh?"  Oh, and my DH is totally guilty of, any time I make a sound, saying, "Is she coming?"  He thinks he's soooooo funny.


 

 

 

post #4 of 49

I get irritated when random strangers ask me my due date (which is none of their business to begin with!), because they almost always say something heart-warming like, "WOW!  Are you sure you've only got one in there!?!?"  Ugh.  Idiots. 

post #5 of 49

Ugh, I got the "about to pop" comment a few weeks ago. So annoying!!!! And last week the lovely receptionist at the chiropractors office had to give me the twin comment too. And she is a mother and her office specializes in pre-natal care!

What is wrong with people!?!

I make a point to tell every pregnant woman I speak to that they look GREAT!

post #6 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by penstamon View Post

And DH: "I can't wait for you to not be pregnant so you can be all hot again"

 

/quote]

bigeyes.gif If my DH said that, he would be in so much trouble! And tempted to say, "So what's your excuse, then?"

I've gotten so many annoying comments. I've been getting the "any day now" comments since 28 weeks. I've also gotten so many comments about maybe I'll go early, blah blah blah. Yeah, because I want a premature baby. eyesroll.gif I've gotten three comments with the word "fat". Awesome.

Lately, it's, "You look miserable!" Gee, thanks. And, "I bet you're hoping baby comes today!" No, because he'd still be too early, and I still have things to get done.

I haaaaate people projecting their feelings onto me. Assuming that I feel just awful and can't wait to get the baby out. In fact, the third tri has been my favorite. shrug.gif

I've also gotten stupid comments from my dad and MIL. My dad keeps pestering me about how much I spend on my breastpump. confused.gif I don't get it. He keeps saying a manual is perfectly fine and is what my mom used. Um, yeah, she only breastfed me for two months and didn't work. Why do you care how much I am spending on a breastpump anyway??? Weirdo. He's also bugged me about circumcision, but luckily, that one hasn't been brought up since Thanksgiving.

MIL likes to compare everything I do to herself and her daughter. Before I knew I had anemia, I felt really weak all the time, and she would tell me stories like, "When I was nine months pregnant, I helped push a car out of a ditch..." Good for you. The comparing me to her daughter is worse. Because SIL had a small baby and went early, automatically DH and I will, too, even though I was 8 lbs. and he was 9 lbs. 1 oz. And DH is 6'7. SIL halfway cloth diapered, so, you know, we couldn't possibly commit to it any more than she did. There are other things, too, just not baby-related. Like, she thought we were dumb for wanting to buy organic, until her daughter got into it, and then it was totally acceptable. I think maybe it's because DH's sister is 11 years older than him, so his mom still thinks of him as the baby. I don't know. But it's annoying. The latest thing MIL has been getting on my case about is an epidural, even though SIL didn't have one, but only because she went too fast. MIL didn't even have one with DH, took Bradley classes, and still makes comments like, "Do you really think you'll be able to do it without an epi?" How would I know, I've never done this before! Ugh, leave me alone!

I really do love my dad and MIL, but they can get annoying sometimes!

post #7 of 49
K, no idea why my post ended up in the quote box, but I can't figure out how to fix it.
post #8 of 49


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by elonwy View Post

The guy at the car lot I park at for work, daily for the past few months: "Should you be driving? You're scaring me!" Umm... ok.

 

Pretty much everyone: "Bet you're ready to be done huh?" Yeah, cause you reminding me makes me even more ready, jerks.

 

My boss for the last few months, every time I make a noise while moving or express any kind of preggo discomfort in his office: "Don't have a baby in my office!" I am tempted to hide a water ballon in my pants one of these days and pop it while sitting on his couch. 

 


hahahahahahahahaha... yeah, that's all I have to say. :) DOOO IT!

 

post #9 of 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by elonwy View Post

 

My boss for the last few months, every time I make a noise while moving or express any kind of preggo discomfort in his office: "Don't have a baby in my office!" I am tempted to hide a water ballon in my pants one of these days and pop it while sitting on his couch. 

 

 

ESPECIALLY after reading your chat thread post, Yeah.. this just seems like a requirement for you on your way out... that would be awesome if it wouldn't reflect negatively on you in the long run!!

 

I was initially amused by the gasps of horror when people find out when I'm due, but they're getting old now that I've been getting them for well over a month. Then of course the women who flat out tell me I'm WRONG about when I'm due, and how I'll NEVER make it. Uh.. yeah. I will. Did this a couple of times before, and I looked just as silly last time. But thanks! I try to laugh off the silliness, but as I get more irritable in general, yeah, it's not always going so well. I should just start telling people, "No, not twins. TRIPLETS!!.... (muttered quietly... ) you enormous tool!"

 

But I won't - I'll just smile and act like they are TERRIBLY clever.
 

 

post #10 of 49

I've posted several times about my mom's rude comments...

 

DD (3.5) told me yesterday I looked like a heffalump. Okay, that was kind of funny, but I'm trying so hard to teach her not to make comments about people's looks...

post #11 of 49

At my babyshower this weeked I told my mother that they are ordering an ultrasound for the 29th because the baby has been measuring small. She snorted and said, "There is no way that baby is small!" Thanks, Dr. Mom!

post #12 of 49

You know, I feel really lucky after hearing all your stories. I only get comments from my family and I'm totally comfortable telling them all to shove it.

 

Next time someone tell you that you're going to pop soon, just look at them and make a pained face and clutch your stomach like you're about to have the baby right then. And then report back their hilarious reactions. :)

post #13 of 49

yup, the generally rude/obnoxious comments/questions about when I'm due and how big I am. I'm finally NOT getting as many comments that I'm "big" for how far along I am - since I'm due in under 3 weeks, though a homeless guy asked me yesterday if it was twins (I said "I HOPE not!")

 

A few people have joked that I got fat - I joke right back that I had a really big lunch.

 

I get a LOT of comments about not knowing if it's a boy or a girl - some people have congratulated me on being brave enough not to find out, some have told me I'm crazy/weird/irresponsible/unreal for not finding out... most just size me up, tell me how I'm carrying (high, low, big, small, sideways, I've heard it ALL), and tell me what THEY think I'm having.

 

I TOTALLY agree that the comments about "you're going to go tomorrow" or "any minute now" are just plain obnoxious - I started getting those at like 26 weeks or something, and I'd actually say... uh, no, I'd really rather NOT have a preemie if I can help it, thanks, I've got lots of stuff to get done before s/he gets here, and I want a HEALTHY baby, so I'd prefer it comes when it's full term, not 3 months early.

These days I just tell people I don't think it's happening for at least another week or two, but that it COULD happen at any moment.

 

I've gotten a lot of comments FROM PEOPLE I KNOW that I've dropped... yeah, hey guys, no, I haven't dropped yet, the baby hasn't gotten any lower, it's just gotten bigger. I'm actually getting kicked in the ribs right now, so I'm pretty sure it hasn't "dropped" eyesroll.gif

 

Oh, and here's a NICE random stranger interaction - Yesterday when I was buying breakfast, I had a woman ask when I was due (not uncommon these days), I said 5/5, and we chit-chatted a little bit - I told her about my friend who, at full term, would mess with people who asked when she was due, and say "um, what are you talking about? I'm not pregnant!"  

When we were both done paying, she wished me an easy delivery - I said thanks, I hope it is! she told me it looked like I'd kept active and been doing a lot of walking and I was looking really healthy, so she was betting it would be - awww - yay!

I've actually had several random strangers tell me how healthy I look, which is pretty darn cool orngbiggrin.gif

 

I am SO thankful that random strangers haven't really tried to touch my belly (though I do walk/stand pretty defensively, so it would be difficult, and I've got an arsenal of reactions ready for that), and I'm FINALLY being offered seats on the subway (though not regularly/always) - it helps that we haven't needed winter coats the last few days, so the belly is BLATANT.

post #14 of 49

The newest one after "Are you ready?" is "You'll wish you were pregnant again once the baby is out. You'll wish you could put it back in!" I'm like.... no, seriously, I won't. This all comes from women that have had children and while I know it's meant to be lighthearted it just really rubs me the wrong way.

post #15 of 49

i'm due may 4 and I'm still waitressing. so i get it all, including the belly rubs from complete strangers. That is the worst. My belly is right at their level when I'm taking their orders.

And I'm working for tips, so I can't be (too) rude.

 

When are you due?.....But, that's, like, next week!

Are you crazy?

You shouldn't be on your feet!

Are you having the baby here?

 

And I am at a point where, if I drop a fork, or a pen or something, I leave it there until I get one of my coworkers, who are all awesome about it, to pick it up for me.

post #16 of 49

ha! Just posted on my FB page that strangers are seriously scared of and/or nervous about my belly...they don't talk to me, they talk to my belly...and everyone gives me a really concerned look like, "please don't have your baby right here, right now!" And yes- when they ask what I'm having and I share that we are opting for the surprise, *everyone* says- "oh, well- it's a boy!" No girl guesses so far;) But really- as I walk around, people stare...and they don't sneak a peak...they just *stare* as I walk by. I didn't even think my belly was that big!

post #17 of 49

I was trying to explain to DH the other day just how annoying it is, and he was like "relax, they mean well" and I was saying, yeah, got that, but REALLY??? Because when he's with me, I don't get near the silliness I get when it's just me or just me and the kids. I think that's mostly because I'm engaged in a conversation with him, so I just make less eye contact with others?

 

Then we went out to eat the other night, and maybe because I've pointed some of this out to him, Idk, he noticed a couple of people just STARING AT MY BELLY. For extended periods of time, while we (and they) were eating. If and when they looked away, they looked back pretty quickly. I didn't notice them, but he did. He had to agree, that got old, and made him a feel a little weirded out. :) I wondered afterwards if possibly my belly was doing it's undulating dance of baby movement and freaking them out? LOL... Idk. The baby is usually so active when I'm eating I can't remember if there was a lot going on or not.

 

When we were eating our lunch, the waitress asked when I was due, and seriously, her eyes just about popped out (NOW who's ready to pop?? haha) and her jaw dropped and she was all "OH MY GOODNESS!! ARE YOU HAVING TWINS??" But with the sweetest southern accent, and I thought dh was going to choke, he was trying so hard not to laugh at her. I think before that he thought I was exaggerating the reactions I get. She then went on to tell me that of course if I believed I was having a boy, I was surely having a girl. Because that's what happened to her!

 

I was sort of pleased with all of it though this time... nailed home my point to the man. :)

post #18 of 49

This morning as I walked into work my coworker greeted me with, "You're still pregnant." Granted, it was early but my first thought was, "no shit." I know they are all excited for me, but really? I'm only 38 weeks today!

 

I also am amazed at how I am progressing is a perfectly normal topic of conversation these days. I surprised a random stranger when I in turn asked her how her cervix was doing today.

post #19 of 49

I love asking her how her cervix was!! Hah!
 

I am going to interject a funny story in here. It was my first conversation with a stranger that was actually enjoyable, in fact was downright amusing.

 

A woman lets me go in front of her on the escalator this morning and says "Looks like you're having a Spring baby!" I reply: "Yup, May Baby" 

 

 

She says: "That reminds me of this time in school when a little girl got up in front of the class and told us that her mommy told her that if she washed her face in the first dew of the first day of May she'd always be beautiful."

 

Then she continues: "The thing is, she was the homeliest little thing I'd ever seen. I just remember being 9 years old sitting there thinking 'It's not working!' "

 

I laughed hysterically all the way to the top of the escalator. Totally made my morning. Sooo random.

post #20 of 49

people are actually asking you how your CERVIX is!? jaw.gif  I mean... wow. Totally the right response to ask her how HERS is ;)

 

I'm actually STILL WAITING for a random stranger to rub my belly without asking (to be fair, I'm generally in a pretty defensive stance with something in front of my belly, so I guess I've done a pretty good job of preventing the problem) - I guess it depends on the situation, but I have a whole arsenal of responses to non-permitted belly touching... muahahahaha. (rub THEIR belly, grab their boobs/crotch, do a kung fu move on them, etc... plus one of these phrases: "oh, I'm sorry, I thought we were inappropriately touching random strangers" with plenty of sarcasm or "STRANGER DANGER!"... yeah.)

 

today I've gotten "you're gonna pop any minute!" and "oh, you're just nesting" (in response to a facebook post about getting the new landlord to take care of pre-existing mold, and finding a new midwife at 38w after the old one dropped me)... then I was told I was in denial about nesting and the baby's coming SOON... uh, no guys... my washing of receiving blankets, clothes, and diapers is nesting, and that's happening later this week... getting a mold issue fixed w/ the new LL and making sure I have someone to catch the baby? yeah, that's just common sense.

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