your experience cosleeping with toddler AND newborn?

[donna-nb]

i have a toddler who will be 2y4m when baby two is born in september. i'm not sure if i should begin some kind of transition process to have him sleep in a separate place? i have heard cosleeping safety rules about not cosleeping a newborn and toddler in the same bed. we have an arms reach to sidecar for the newborn-- wouldn't that be safe? but then how do i manage to nurse toddler in the sidecar crib on the other side?! and where does that leave my husband?! doesn't the newborn crying wake up the older baby?

my other question is about getting and keeping both my toddler and new baby to sleep. right now my toddler nurses to sleep, sleeps in the sidecar crib "mostly" and wakes up to nurse back to sleep about twice a night (though he has gone all night a few times without waking to nurse recently-- which i actually love). i've read here about some parents' routines regarding getting two kids down to sleep-- i'd love to hear more advice and experience, especially if your toddler is still nursing during the night.

[yummus]

Subbing - I'd like to hear about this too!

[Shami]

Bump! mine will be 4 years old almost to the day when my new babe is born. Although she hasn't nursed since she was 3, she still seems to need a lot of night time care. It hasn't been easy.

[Chloe'sMama]

Well, we kind of broke the rules.  DD1 sleeps between DH and I and DD2 sleeps on my side with a bump on the edge.  We just moved DD1's twin bed into our room (2 nights ago) and now she is sleeping there, although, it is just an extention of our bed.

When DD2 was super little, she was with DH and I in living room until we went to bed.  At 5 months, we could put both on the bed with a barrier between to give the adults some time.

[Chloe'sMama]

Also, DD1 night weaned before DD2 came, but she still asked after baby was born...  I dont think it would be a problem to nurse both at night....  

DD2 doesnt wake DD1 up very much...  maybe 1-2 times a month on BAD nights.

Both nurse to sleep, so whoewver is the most tired will lay with me first and nurse to sleep and then DH brings me the other one and I nurse her to sleep.  There are tears sometime from the child who is waiting, but not often.

[CherryBombMama]

the way we sleep is: dh on one side of the bed, then the toddler, then me, then the baby in the sidecar. 

ds1 never wakes up when ds2 would cry. i think he woke up once, but that was when ds2 was crying for 45+ minutes (in my arms, in the bed) and we couldnt figure out why. crying for nursing or to be changed or something similar has never ever woken up ds1.

your toddler is big enough to sleep in the middle, IMO, which would help you with night nursing. 

[donna-nb]

Thank you all very much-- this helps.  I may consider temporarily removing the crib and putting down a spare twin mattress next to our queen, like someone here said-- for extra space, be it adult or child.  The dad-toddler-me-newborn in sidecar bassinet sounds like a doable set up.