Hi everyone. I don't know how to explain my situation, but hoping for some advice and/or experiences.
I filed for divorce in Nov. the day that I filed, he got a protective order against me (under false accusations), which kicked me out of my house and away from our children (one of whom was still nursing) for 2 weeks. We had just moved to a new city to go to school, and I only had one local phone number to call.. a study friend from school. So, I ended up staying with him for those 2 weeks, and he was wonderful, respectful, and we became the best of friends over that time. I moved back home after court (stbx moved in with his mom), and my friend and I started dating a few weeks after that...
Fast forward to now.. We are sooo very much in love.. he is still wonderful, respectful and kind. My kids love him, he has been there for me in every way.. and now I am pregnant and we are engaged.
However, stbx and I are still not divorced.. he's been dragging it out in court.. he's rescheduled mediations to push them back, and this last one he canceled completely. He claimed our kids on his tax return and won't give me half of the return (and he KNOWS that I was counting on that money to keep a roof over my head, as I am a full time student and can't get a job right now). DF and I have been unofficially living together (he has his own place but stays with me), and we just signed a lease to get a place together.
Well.. stbx, is emotionally abusive and very crazy. He still tells everyone I am his wife. He posts on his facebook that his wife is having an adulterous affair.. and his wife is pregnant with someone else's baby... he stole all "our" money, filed that protective order to get back at me for filing for divorce and to kick me out of the house so that he could take whatever he wanted.. and to get a free attorney.. fired that attorney because he wouldn't go along with his plan to take the kids from me.. is trying to get sole custody of the kids and accusing me of neglect. And now.. I got a motion for temporary orders that he is trying to make it so that DF cannot be around the kids at all.. and over nights, that DF can't drive my car, and that I have to have his written permission to drive out of state! WTF! Why does he feel like he has to treat me like a 17 yr old! (Something that was an issue our entire marriage, actually it should come as no surprise).
So, now, here I am.. in love with the most wonderful man I've ever met, we're having a baby together, my children adore him... he IS going to be their step father.. and my stbx is trying to do everything he can to tear us apart, break us up, keep him away from me and our children.. AND he is still trying to get sole custody of the kids (youngest is STILL nursing, even after all of this). He keeps dragging the divorce out as much as he can.
Anyway.. we're going to have to go to court over the temp motion.. and I am so scared. I can't NOT live with DF. I don't have an income- he's been wonderful to help take care of us through all of this.. I can't get a job because I am having complications with this pregnancy, we have a lease together, and we ARE going to get married.. as SOON as the divorce is final. We would be married already if we could.. but stbx is dragging his feet on everything.
I'm scared.. feeling hopeless, and angry, and could really use some hugs, experience, and advice.
Edited by SierraBella - 4/23/11 at 8:20am