I didn't read all the responses but want to respond to the OP. I think it is 100% your right to keep your kids away from another child who is repeatedly physically hurting them- even if he is family. If I had a cousin beating up on my baby or kid of any age, I would not let my ds be in that situation if the other kids parents are not stepping in. I think you should have a talk with the mom of agressive kid when no kids are around- and say
"-listen, I really want us to be able to hang out, and some niceties-however- having my kids be hurt by your kid is unacceptable to me. I see that you are overwhelmed with him. If you would like some advice, since I have parented 4 of them, I would be happy to shre my ideas with you. IF you are not willing to do anything about the situation, then I would like to either have your permission to discipline your kid, or request that we not hang out while he is acting like this."
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so in other words, try to broach the subject with the mom from the approachof- my kids are getting hurt and I need to figure out how to make that not happen. Ask her if she wants advice before giving it, and then maybe try to brainstorm together to find a workable situation. IF she is not wlling to do anything differently, then I think you should just stop hanging out with them. you can't just let another kid harm yours just because he is young and family! good luck
