Do you nurse your toddler on demand?

[namistenicole]

Do you nurse your toddler on demand? Or do you have more of a routine or schedule at this point?

[D_McG]

I nursed my first on demand and it turned out not to be a good thing. With my second I put us on a schedule in year 2 and it massively improved our nursing relationship. I am due with #3 any day and will schedule after the baby phase with her, too. (sometime after the first year).

[Marissamom]

other: I nursed DD on demand until about 15 months, when I occasionally started to refuse for my own sanity. at 18 months I put her on a strict schedule because my milk had switched to colostrum and was giving her diarrhea. at about 2o months I relaxed the schedule, but still limited/refused sometimes. for the first couple of weeks of tandem nursing I nursed her pretty mush on-demand as long as the baby wasn't nursing. now there are some limits because I have to spend a lot of time taking care of the baby. 

[KristyDi]

Kind of on demand but not really. We're not really on any kind of a schedule. It depends on what's going on.  When she was a baby, if she needed to nurse, then I sat down and nursed her.  Now at 3, she can wait till we're in a convenient place or I finish what I'm doing.  We don't nurse in public anymore and she hasn't asked to nurse outside the house in a really long time.  Or if I'm feeling touched out, I refuse or put her off till later or distract her somehow.  I also refuse to nurse while I'm eating.

In the evening after dinner I don't nurse her until she's ready for bed.  She frequently will resist getting ready for bed, even when she's tired and if I let her nurse, she falls asleep on the boob then I have to wake her to get a diaper on her (no chance of her sleeping through that) then she's cranky and awake and really hard to get settled.

[Ldavis24]

Ugh, on demand but I wish it wasn't this way.

If we are at home all day with not much to do she is basically clamoring for boob CONSTANTLY...I mean she will nurse literally every 2 hours for half an hour at a time..Mostly she just likes the comfort I think...

This is causing a problem with the amount of solid food she is eating. I don't think she's eating enough food food and she is nursing a lot to make up for it. Unfortunately she disagrees and I have food thrown at me more than once while she screamed for "Nummas!" over and over. I end up giving in because I don't know what else to do. I don't want her to starve herself and I can't take the hysterics!

I would love to get her on some kind of schedule, she is 23 months old and I am feeling like she nurses WAY too much..

When aren't home or are busy of course she can much longer but we are home a lot so she is nursing A LOT...

Sorry for hijacking, that kind of all just spilled out!

[nachipmunks]

I thought my toddler was the only one that was to nurse all the time and refuse food and ask for milk instead. If I try to nurse her when she is hungry she will throw the plate or food away. I nurse her on demand since she literally demands "mulk" lifts up my shirt. I am having similar problems as LDavis. She is now anemia and I am giving her floradix iron. 

[namistenicole]

I'm right there with you guys. DD is tiny and often refuses to eat in lieu of nursing. This morning she nursed for like an hour in bed and then wanted to nurse again an hour or so later. And she gets really, really upset when I say no - like only a 2-year-old can. Sometimes I say "no, not until bedtime" and she'll be ok, but mostly she gets upset. I wanted to wean because I felt like it's become too much of a power struggle, but after reading some stuff on KellyMom I'm confused. I don't want to traumatically take it away before she's ready, but it's creating a bad dynamic between us...

[Ldavis24]

Originally Posted by namistenicole 

I'm right there with you guys. DD is tiny and often refuses to eat in lieu of nursing. This morning she nursed for like an hour in bed and then wanted to nurse again an hour or so later. And she gets really, really upset when I say no - like only a 2-year-old can. Sometimes I say "no, not until bedtime" and she'll be ok, but mostly she gets upset. I wanted to wean because I felt like it's become too much of a power struggle, but after reading some stuff on KellyMom I'm confused. I don't want to traumatically take it away before she's ready, but it's creating a bad dynamic between us...

thats hard!

My DD is a BIG girl..

I think about weaning a lot, especially on days where all she wants to do is nurse. I know she LOVES it though and still needs it. Such a source of comfort and at this point a source of nutrition for her still. Otherwise she would just be drinking lots of cows milk (she loves it) and what is the point of giving her that when she can have the real good stuff from me...

Oh there are the days where I fantasize about weaning though. I would love love love to be able to go to the bar with DH and friends and have more than 1 beer, maybe even 6 beers! I'm only 25, I feel so old sometimes and the fact that I haven't had a glass of wine or a beer more often than once a month in  well over 2 years is frustrating sometimes...

[crunchy_mommy]

Somewhere in the middle... we nursed on demand until ~18mos and then I started putting in some limits, but we don't have any sort of schedule or anything. We partially night-weaned after he turned 2 (which also included not nursing to sleep)... So basically now we nurse about 50% on demand and the other 50% of the time, I will ask him to wait or say 'no' if I'm just touched-out. Even with all those limits, he still nurses 10+ times a day.

[CI Mama]

DD is 31 months old and we only nurse at night. Once on each side before going to sleep, and I mostly limit that to 2-3 minutes per side (she would go much longer if allowed). If she falls asleep during that nursing session, great, but if she doesn't, more nursing is no longer an option. She can snuggle on my lap or in bed, and I sing to her. Once she's asleep, she goes into a twin bed that's on the floor in our bedroom, next to our queen bed (also on the floor). 

If she wakes up during the night, she crawl into the big bed & nurse briefly on each side. But we're working on getting her to sleep all night in her own bed, which she is totally capable of doing. In fact, if I'm away for a night (like I was two nights ago), she sleeps in her own bed all night just fine. We are giving her lots of praise for that.

I never thought I'd nurse DD this long. I fully intended to wean her at 24 months! Instead, I've been taking baby steps towards weaning for a long, long time. I keep telling myself, next month I'm doing it! No more nursing!!! Sleep has always been such a big issue with DD...she doesn't go to sleep easily, doesn't stay asleep. Only since she's been about 27 months has she slept well enough that I can actually get decent sleep most of the time. The more I see that she can go to sleep & stay asleep without the boob, the more encouraged I am to actually wean for good.

[Ldavis24]

Originally Posted by CI Mama 

DD is 31 months old and we only nurse at night. Once on each side before going to sleep, and I mostly limit that to 2-3 minutes per side (she would go much longer if allowed). If she falls asleep during that nursing session, great, but if she doesn't, more nursing is no longer an option. She can snuggle on my lap or in bed, and I sing to her. Once she's asleep, she goes into a twin bed that's on the floor in our bedroom, next to our queen bed (also on the floor). 

If she wakes up during the night, she crawl into the big bed & nurse briefly on each side. But we're working on getting her to sleep all night in her own bed, which she is totally capable of doing. In fact, if I'm away for a night (like I was two nights ago), she sleeps in her own bed all night just fine. We are giving her lots of praise for that.

I never thought I'd nurse DD this long. I fully intended to wean her at 24 months! Instead, I've been taking baby steps towards weaning for a long, long time. I keep telling myself, next month I'm doing it! No more nursing!!! Sleep has always been such a big issue with DD...she doesn't go to sleep easily, doesn't stay asleep. Only since she's been about 27 months has she slept well enough that I can actually get decent sleep most of the time. The more I see that she can go to sleep & stay asleep without the boob, the more encouraged I am to actually wean for good.

I know!

I keep telling DH, I'll start the PROCESS of weaning her at around 2. Well she is going to be 2 really soon and I don't see how starting it is going to go so well at this point.

My new goal is to be weaned by 3. I know she'd nurse longer but I don't think I can go past 3 at this point in time. If she willingly and happily weaned herself tomorrow I would be so thrilled...

Baby steps I keep telling myself...I actually do the same thing at night with DD. She is allowed to nurse on each side as much as she wants and then no more after that. She will use my boobs as an excuse to stay awake otherwise.

[hildare]

other.  i woh, so i can't nurse during the day.  when i get home, though we do nurse on demand, including (sigh) all night long.

[CI Mama]

Originally Posted by hildare 

other.  i woh, so i can't nurse during the day.  when i get home, though we do nurse on demand, including (sigh) all night long.

Oh, mama, I hear you! I returned to work full-time when DD was 12 weeks old, and she quickly learned to do most of her eating at night. I think that's why it's been such a long transition away from night-time nursing. DD wants me! And she's only got me at night.

[Asiago]

My son is nursed on demand, he's 18 months.

[samann1121]

My one and only just turned 2.  About 6 months ago I started refusing sometimes or making her wait on occasion.  I usually let her when she asks, but sometimes I just don't feel like it!  I've added some rules lately, like there's a "last time" before she falls asleep at night, and I'll only feed her once after we wake up, before we get out of bed.  It's all to keep my sanity.  She'd nurse every hour during the day if I let her!

[voca]

My daughter is 21 months. She nurses more or less on demand, though I do make her wait if I am doing something incompatible, and she is a basically night weaned -- we have a nursing blackout between 11p and 5a, but usually her last nurse is around 9p and her first around 6a.

I still nurse her down for bed and naps when I am home for them. When I am not her father bottle nurses her down.

Outside of nursing down and the morning nurse the amount varies wildly. We had a stretch of about two weeks where that was the only nursing we did, more recently it's been 8-10 times a day again.

Mainly it doesn't bother me. If I get touched out I will tell her no. Last night she couldn't get to sleep and I got so touched out I made her stop before sleep came, and she rolled over and eventually slept. So I am guessing I could limit it more if I was so inclined.

[crunchy_mommy]

Wow -- for those that do always nurse on demand, how often does your toddler nurse?? I give you guys a lot of credit... I gave up the demand thing because he was asking too much (20+ times a day) ... I just couldn't do it anymore, even though I wanted to...

[waiting2bemommy]

She nurses a LOT. Like, a million times a day. Or so it feels like.

I'm trying to offer distractions, food (which she readily eats) but she loves her milk too. I've given up on nightweaning til her molars are in all the way, hopefully soon!

And ldavis, I've been nursing or pregnant since 2007 and I would definitely say it's ok to have more than 1 beer! If you leave her for the night, then you culd probably safely drink a fair amount, and be ok by the time she's ready to nurse the following day. I definitely don't limit myself to once a month, even while pregnant. I just don't have more than one drink while pregnant, and only a small glass of wine or a small amount of beer. Maybe, 3 times a month? maybe 4? I stick to that until the baby has started solids and sleeps a decent stretch at night (4-5 hrs). And then I give a bottle of pumped milk, put the baby back to sleep, and am good to go for the next feeding. HAven't had any issue.

Actually, I'd worry more about cosleeping after consuming alcohol. I usually sleep on the couch after I've been drinking, even if it's just a little. I just am paranoid like that.

[Asiago]

Originally Posted by crunchy_mommy 

Wow -- for those that do always nurse on demand, how often does your toddler nurse?? I give you guys a lot of credit... I gave up the demand thing because he was asking too much (20+ times a day) ... I just couldn't do it anymore, even though I wanted to..

My son nurses 20+ times a day also. Usually it is for a few minutes, unless he is nursing to sleep then it may take half an hour or more.

[sosurreal09]

We nurse on demand but DD eats a TON of solids as well. She still nurses 6+x a day though. She is 21lbs at 18 m/o.