*~May 2006 Mamas~*

[Sydnee]

Hey mamas!  It's been awhile since we've chatted!  I thought I would start a new thread since our "babies" will be turning FIVE!!!!!  Holy carp!

We are doing great,  Alayna's birthday is May 2, and I cannot believe she will be five.  I can't fathom her starting school this fall, although she is sooooo ready!  She is HIGH energy, and somedays I just don't know aht to do with her, lol.  I know that she needs outside stimulation, as she is one that doesn't like to do "school" stuff at home anymore.  It cracks me up that her Wednesday night teachers at church always tell me what a quiet, polite little girl she is, haha!

How are the rest of you?????

[ecoteat]

I was just thinking about you all the other day! Thanks for starting a new thread, Syndee.

I can't BELIEVE we are about to have a bunch of 5 year olds. I'm really excited for Phoebe. It occured to me that her birthday is in less than 3 weeks and I have no plans for a celebration at all. We've always invited our closer circle of friends and their kids for a party, but now she has so many more friends beyond that circle. I want to ask her who she wants, but I'm afraid of opening up a can of worms where it just turns into way too long of a list. Her bed is a mattress on the floor, so for her birthday we are getting her a new bed and sheets and all that fun stuff. She will be thrilled!

She's been going through a pretty demanding and whiny phase lately. The little things that we've always let her make decisions about are turning into a power struggle anyway! Every nap and bedtime we let her choose the book we read, but lately she dawdles and makes a big production out of it. If I give her 5 to choose from, she screams and cries that she doesn't want any of those. If I say "pick a book before I count to 10" she screams and cries that she hates when I count down like that (where did THAT come from? We've always done that!). We've tried not reading a book, and that is a COMPLETE disaster. I can't see how it's really worth the total meltdown to force that point. We'll try just grabbing a book we choose and start reading, and she screams. It's awful. If I'm in the middle of a chapter book, that totally derails the whole fiasco, but we like the picture books too! I just don't know what to do. I tell her that it's not nice to keep dh and I waiting while she makes a big deal out of it. I've tried having her pick a stack of books in advance, but then she decides she changed her mind when it comes time to read the book she picked earlier. Can you tell this is driving me crazy? Apparently I haven't had a chance to vent to anyone else about this, so I'm dumping my frustration on you! Clothes can be a little like this, too, but to a lesser degree. I've thought about getting a timer, but based on her reaction to us counting, I think the pressure of that would push her over the edge, and that would be ugly for everyone involved. What would you do?

[~*max*~]

Hello May Mamas! Sydnee, thanks for starting a new thread. I know, I can't believe 5 and kindergarten are almost here!

Amy, that's a tough one! I can see how it would get pretty exaperating for the adults. Do you think it is an anxiety issue, or a control issue, or something else? If it were me, about 5-10 minutes before story time (while I was busy doing something else), I'd tell dd "It's almost storytime. If you'd like to choose a book go ahead and pick one now. When I'm done doing the dishes (or whatever you are doing) we'll read it. If you don't have one chosen by then either I'll choose it or if you don't want that we'll skip the story and go right to bed." Of course the first time there will probably be a meltdown, but the second time I think she'd get it. This comes from the mother of 4 of course, which I know can parent very differently than a mother of an only - with 4 kids I just don't have time for riding out such situations.  

We're all well here. The three big kids are all in Little League, so that is dominating our time right now. And we are gearing up for camping season - yay! Dh's business is going along better now, so that's a big relief.

I'm looking forward to catching up w/everyone!!!  

[~*max*~]

I linked the old thread so folks could find us.

[Mamabeakley]

Ooh, thanks for linking Max!

My May Babe turned five on Monday.  We had a fun day - went to Rio in the theatre with popcorn, a pair of brothers he and his big brother are friends with, his godmother, and three cousins.  Then we walked to an ice-cream place nearby and got cones.  Afterwards DH took the kids for an outdoor ramble, and I made a cake for after dinner.

I am a pretty "mean" mommy.  Maybe it's having 3, but like Max I just plain don't have time to deal with the "I've got to do it my way and I'll take all day" behavior.  In some ways I am sure this is good for DS, and in other ways I feel bad that I don't have time to let him figure out his way.  Getting dressed is the big thing in this area - nowadays I tend to just say, "You are 5 years old and I know you can get dressed all by yourself.  If you want my help, you have to do it now.  If you don't, I am going to go [do whatever I need to do]."  He does really like us to do things for him - that's his "love language" - so it's a delicate balance right now between encouraging independence and being nurturing.  It's funny - my third is the first of my children I've (almost literally) ever heard "do it myself" from!

We are still 'commuting' back and forth each week.  I am getting really frustrated with it and trying to figure out what to do and DH won't really talk to me about it at all (which is maddening.)  I know we will work through it one way or another, eventually, but it's depressing and frustrating right now.  Prayers and good thoughts very welcome!

[~*max*~]

  Just wanted to jump back on and wish all the May Mamas a most wonderful Mother's Day tomorrow!!! I hope you all have wonderful, joyous days with your families.

[alaskaberry]

Hi all! I'm glad I found the new thread!

Orion's birthday was this past Friday. We had a pirate party on Saturday, with a treasure hunt for the pinata. Instead of hitting it to open it, the kids pretended to be Krakens and squeezed it open (we had some trouble hanging it in my house and it was still too cold to do it outside!). It was pretty fun.

Orion's big thing right now is being bossy and ordering everyone around. If he doesn't get his way he will repeat the last thing he said about 10 times at top volume, in case you didn't hear. It really annoys me! In terms of things he won't get done, I count from 5...usually I get to 2 and he will do what I'm asking. But just as often he ignores me and pretends he hasn't heard. It doesn't work for tantrums either (sadly).

Amy--I don't have any good advice for that one, sorry. Usually he will yell at me that he wants his way and I will tell him he isn't getting his way. To avoid an argument (can't win one with a 5 yr old!), I just say that's that and stick to my guns.

In personal news, I got back together with Orion's dad after some long talks and agreement on both our parts to work on the relationship.

[Sydnee]

Hi mamas!  Just wanted to stop in quick to wish any babes that I might have missed a very happy birthday!!  I truly can't belive that we are here, 5 years later.  CRAZY how fast time goes by, makes me sad.  I actually miss the breastfeeding/cloth diapers, snuggling in our sling, etc. etc.  I must be going through a bit of 5 years post partum depression, lol!!!

Amy, we STILL deal with Alayna's whining and tantrums.  It's VERY exhausting.  Everyone said it would end at 5, but it hasn't yet:)  I try to stick to my guns as much as I can, but that gets hard also. 

Phoebe-  I am glad that you and Orion's dad have worked things out!

Max-  Do you have a busy summer of camping planned?  I am anxious to start this weekend!

Alayna started T ball last night and really enjoyed it.  It will be a great way for her to get some of that energy out, haha!!  We have one week left of school, and I am not sure how I feel about it.  Summer means extra kids in daycare, which gets exhausting.  However with the girls being older, they LOVE to help out with daycare, so I am hoping to keep them busy enough to not fight.

Alrighty, have a great week mamas!!

[Mamabeakley]

Hi, mamas!

Just a quick note to say that I think we're going to actually MOVE by about August 1.  My dad has a rental property he's willing to let us stay in - it's not really a residential space (art studio, kinda) but there is running water, a toilet, and gas for a stove.  There's a lot of work to do to clear out junk before we can stay there, and it's certainly not what we want to do long term, but we would be able to stop driving back and forth!  So I'm not exactly excited . . . but relieved to be moving in a positive direction.  My oldest (DS, 7 yo) is really upset actually - he doesn't want to leave his friends, he wants to live in a house, etc.  My May babe isn't so worried - less ability to project, more interested in where his brother is than other friends, etc.

Got to go for now.

[~*max*~]

Hi Mamas. Just wanted to pop in quick to let you know I am thinking about you all and hope all the May babes had wonderful 5th birthdays!!!!

Mamabeakley, best of luck w/ the move. Sounds like you are off on an adventure! That will be such a relief for you I'm sure not to have to commute so much. I hope ds1 has a smooth adjustment to the process.

Sydnee, how was your first camping trip? We are off on our first trip this weekend. We're so excited. Everyone is just that much older (especially LO) that we have more opportunities & more freedom now when we camp.

Amy, how's it going w/Phoebe? I hope all is well w/you both. You must be so excited for summer vacation! Any special plans?

Alaskaberry, wishing you & Orion's dad all the best in your reconciliation.

Off to pack for our trip!!!

[ecoteat]

Mamabeakley, that's great that you are moving! I would actually really enjoy moving into a space like that. We once had an apartment that was really just two big rooms with a tiny kitchen attaching them and it was so much fun setting it up. I loved that apartment--we did a really nice job with it!

Sydnee, I do not miss those baby days at all! I really enjoy snuggling other people's babies, and then I really enjoy passing them back and feeling relieved that Phoebe is an only! And that she's so big and independent. I think this is the first birthday that I didn't really feel any nostalgia for the younger years, which actually felt a little odd, in a strange way.

Phoebe, good luck on rebuilding your relationship. That much be pretty challenging and exciting. What do the boys think about what's been going on with you two?

Max, where are you headed? Are you camping? We are looking forward to some summer travel. We did a couple wonderful island adventures last year that we want to recreate.

Phoebe seems to have come out the other end of a particularly whiny phase. She's been pretty delightful lately, actually! We've officially decided that she will come to my school for K, so I brought her in last week for the K screening, which was so weird to be in the school as a parent and not as a teacher. She was a little shy at first, and wanted me in the room, but then did just fine. This year will be winding down pretty quickly--Phoebe only has two more weeks of school! We'll miss her sweet little preschool. She's been there for three years and it's been wonderful. I'm working on a gift for her teacher. Phoebe drew a picture of her and I embroidered it on linen. I'll use that piece to make a pocket to sew onto an apron. Phoebe also wrote a poem for her:

All the life we live in

Is full of beauty and care

The moon shines bright

The sun shines yellow

The stars twinkle from far away

[Ducky5306]

It's always good to come on here and read about the other May '06 babies and mamas doing well 

I can't believe all our babies are 5 already!

Hope everyone has an amazing summer!

[~*max*~]

Amy, that gift sounds so absolutely amazing! You (and Phoebe!) are so talented. What a smart girl composing that poem.

Ducky, nice to "see" you back! How's all in your life? Are you still crafting/sewing? If I remember correctly, you had an impressive website of items you'd made.

Gotta run. Be back soon.

[Mamabeakley]

Hi, everybody!

I have a nasty headache at the moment, so bear with me if I am whiney . . ..

We got to go to a friend's house who has shingles and maybe her kids have chicken pox today.  I'm glad we went - she is pretty wiped out and I think I was able to be helpful - but I'm not at all sure we'll end up with CP out of the deal.  We tried - all four boys played in a slip & slide all jumping on top of each other and we had them trade lollipops and spit on their hands and shake them.  This would be a perfect time for CP for us - IF my kids all got it together and on the quicker side of things and we could be done with it by the first week of July.  We'll see!  My brother, who is married to a medical resident, is a bit freaked out that we are doing this this way.  They have a 5 month old and apparently the vaccine isn't given until after the first birthday . . . to me this means, there's nothing to worry about - the reason they don't give it is that babies generally don't get sick from CP - but . . . I'm trying to be very sympathetic and supportive and do-unto-others-as-I'd-have-them-do-unto-me.  But I guess this is one of the first times a family member has been really bothered by one of my parenting choices, so it's feeling challenging.

DH is trying to get DS1 on a swim team.  Normally, I'd be all about that, but with trying to move it seems like bad timing.  Grump.

And, my grandmother is progressing through Alzheimer's and maybe had a minor heart attack last night.  I feel like the woman who I knew all my life is more or less gone already; but I'm sure I will be sad when her body actually dies.

So, I hope you all are having a more cheerful week than I, and enjoying the heat (if you've got it!)

[~*max*~]

Hello My Mamas!!! How is everyone doing? I have been thinking about everyone & thought I'd bump our thread up for a little check in. I hope everyone is having a fabulous summer.

We're all well here, keeping super busy. We're doing as much camping as we can fit in of course, tons of beach time, the big girls have swim lessons right now, and I'm still working part-time - so lots of juggling. Dh's business is going well. Slow, but steady. We are optimistic. In the fall I'll have all 4 kids in full day school, which is actually really sad for me. It is going to be a big transition. I am not loving working, although I have a really great job as far as my field goes. 

Looking forward to hearing how you all are doing.    

[Mamabeakley]

Hi, Max & Mamas!

We are just back from 4 days away in the mountains with 7 cousins and 11 aunts/uncles/grandparents, plus our family of 5.  2 of the cousins and 4 of the adults are staying at our house last night and tonight, too.  Fun, fun, fun :-)  My May boy hiked most of the way up Old Rag (a small mountain in the Shenandoah National Forest) with his dad - probably about a 5 or 5.5 mile round trip.  He's proud of himself!  We also did a 3 mile round-trip hike all together, which was a lot of fun, too.  I carried my 2 yo (whose birthday is today!) on that one, which *I'm* proud of myself for :-)  

When my husband took R up the mountain they didn't get back until after dark.  I was not worried at all until my parents-in-law started freaking out and went to go look for them.  It was really an odd experience - I very clearly knew, internally, that they were fine.  Also, that was the rational position to take, since I know my husband and if he tells you he'll be back at 8 that means 9 and then if you calculate in mountain climbing and a 5 year old, you know that really means 10, which is exactly when they got back.  But my in-laws anxiety had me almost in panic-attack mode.  Bizarre!

My oldest (7) ruptured an ear-drum by getting tumbled by a wave at the beach a few weeks ago :-(  Then it got infected and he got to have his first ever round of abx.  Poor kid!  He is bearing up under the disappointment of no more swimming for the summer, though.

It doesn't look like we'll actually get to move by early August, though.  I'm disappointed, but things do seem to be moving in the right direction (at least I think they are.  My dad called while we were away and I don't know what he needs to tell me yet).

Hope you are all having a great summer - but feel free to tell us if you're not - we're here for ya!

[alaskaberry]

hey everyone!

hope you all stayed safe during Irene. VT got hit pretty bad, esp the lower lying areas around where my family lives. It was pretty shocking to see all that devastation, even though I only saw it on FB.

Other than that, looks like everyone had a great summer. I know we sure did :)

max--I'm glad your DH's business seems to be working out. :) Also that you got loads of camping in.

MamaB--That sounds like an awesome trip! (and sorry about your 7 yr old's ear...poor guy)

Amy--I love Phoebe's little poem.

Sydnee--I miss babies too! My dp thinks I'm crazy. Sigh.



Lots of blueberry picking adventures here, including a 3-mile walk to the middle of crazy nowhere and a giant mud-pit (well, at least the boys were happy...I wish I'd had my camera!!). I only got about half a gallon this summer and now they're all gone. :( I'm not a very fast picker.

We finished painting and putting up the siding on our new house. However, we won't be moving over there until next fall because we still have to wire it...also, my dp somehow forgot to factor in a hallway for the upstairs...oops! Probably no running water again for another 2 years, but I absolutely insist on a washer or I refuse to move in. No more laundromat for me!!

Orion has just started school at the local public school. He isn't very communicative about it, all I get is "it's great" and that's it. His teacher is very nice, however, and seems
to love her job. She also congratulated me on how academically ahead he was already... :) I hope it doesn't become a problem and he doesn't get bored b/c he's ahead of almost everyone else (I mean, they're doing the alphabet right now...jeez).
 
Tomorrow we're off to Pioneer Park for the last day of train rides and the carousel before winter. Autumn is nearly over and snow is on its way!
 

[~*max*~]

Hi May Mama Friends! Thanks for updating this thread Phoebe. That is exciting about your new house. How are things going w/you & Orion's dad?

The hurricane hit here, but we were just fine. We lost power for a couple of days, and school was delayed until this week, but otherwise we are very thankful. Some parts of our state are still w/out power. How did everyone else fair?

And speaking of school, how many of our May babes are starting kindergarten this year? Any homeschoolers? LO starts tomorrow - and I will have all 4 kids in school full day. I am not handling it very well. It will be my first time in 11 years with no little ones at home. I am really sad about it, but trying to embrace this new chapter in our lives. I long for another baby something fierce, but it is not in the cards fo us.

Looking forward to hearing from the rest of you all.

[Mamabeakley]

Hi, everyone!

We are homeschooling - no big "school starting" day here.  Just life.

R (my May babe) had to have a tooth pulled today :-(  It's been dead a long time - he chipped it the same week it came in as an infant - but it was starting to abscess.  He was scared, but because it was dead and because it was a front tooth, it wasn't really that bad - very quick!

I am very stressed in very many ways - we still haven't moved, can't for at least another month or so and I think DH will refuse to ACTUALLY move until winter at this point.  But within the next month we should be out of my mom's apartment and into a different space, by ourselves, when we are 'away' so that will be good.  But things are strained and this is the busiest time at work all year and . . . what does not kill us makes us stronger?  I hope?

Hope ya'll are less stressed!

[alaskaberry]

Hey everyone! Just checking in. We're doing well here in Alaska, slowing down a bit for winter. I bought some Waldorf books and read Simplicity Parenting, which prompted me to do a massive toy overhaul. It wasn't that painful, actually... most of our toys were broken and never got played with anyway. The only thing I didn't get rid of that I wanted to was all of Orion's Thomas the Train things--he *loves* Thomas, but talks about Thomas constantly, so much that it's like an obsession. I put most of the books in storage except for the favorites, and bought a book called "Children of the Forest" by Elsa Beskow which is beautiful--and the kids love it. I'm a pretty lazy mom so I haven't done anything "Waldorf-y" yet at home except buy more art supplies. Orion is really loving Kindergarten and talks about his teacher all the time, which is very sweet. He has picked up some annoying habits, like answering questions with "because" and correcting my accent! (I drop my T's) ("it's win-TER, mommy, not "winn'er") Other than that, pretty smooth sailing here (well except the roads, which are as you'd expect from constant freezing/melting).

How is everyone else doing? :)