Family table rules - Page 2

[velochic]

Originally Posted by sharr610 

Thanks, everyone for the great replies.  We took away the taste your food rule and will be introducing serving dishes soon.  Just taking away the tasting rule made everything so much better!  

IDK, I think the tasting rule is an important one.  Kids who are picky and not encouraged to try something new will never venture out on their own to expand their palate.  We've always had this rule and, while dd isn't a picky eater, saying, "Here, try this" has introduced her to some of her favorite foods.  She's an adventurous eater and I do believe that the "taste each time you're presented with it" rule has been key to that.  She eats some things that adults won't try (like frog's legs and mussels and odd fruits/veggies) and learning to just try something is *by itself* a good thing to teach.  Just getting used to trying things.  It won't be a battle if it's just a rule... like not running in the road or putting your clothes in the dirty clothes hamper.  However, the tasting rule is a hill I will die on and for others it's not that important, whereas something else I might be kind of "meh" about and it's a hill someone else will die on.  I'm just saying that THAT particular rule and enforcing it seems to have really paid off for us.

Anyway, our rules are fairly strict because manners at the table are very important in our home.  We are occasionally in situations where dd has to be at a formal table, so we try to practice these and model them at home.  Teaching proper table etiquette (including the more obscure things like putting your napkin on your seat instead of the table when you temporarily excuse yourself, using the correct utensil and using it correctly even for different seafoods, and using your bread plate properly, etc.) over the years has really paid off.  Dd is 9 now and she does have very good table manners.  I think at 2, not putting your feet on the table is a good rule, but the rules should change as children grow.  As they get older, the expectations should grow as well.  It seems all too often that table manners is no longer a priority and I think it's a crying shame.  The rules should, IMO, be dynamic based on age and ability.  At 9, we now expect dd to act just like a mannered adult would at the table, but it's been years of gently teaching her the "rules" to get there.

[Chicky2]

Originally Posted by velochic 

IDK, I think the tasting rule is an important one.  Kids who are picky and not encouraged to try something new will never venture out on their own to expand their palate.  We've always had this rule and, while dd isn't a picky eater, saying, "Here, try this" has introduced her to some of her favorite foods.  She's an adventurous eater and I do believe that the "taste each time you're presented with it" rule has been key to that.  She eats some things that adults won't try (like frog's legs and mussels and odd fruits/veggies) and learning to just try something is *by itself* a good thing to teach.  Just getting used to trying things.  It won't be a battle if it's just a rule... like not running in the road or putting your clothes in the dirty clothes hamper.  However, the tasting rule is a hill I will die on and for others it's not that important, whereas something else I might be kind of "meh" about and it's a hill someone else will die on.  I'm just saying that THAT particular rule and enforcing it seems to have really paid off for us.

Anyway, our rules are fairly strict because manners at the table are very important in our home.  We are occasionally in situations where dd has to be at a formal table, so we try to practice these and model them at home.  Teaching proper table etiquette (including the more obscure things like putting your napkin on your seat instead of the table when you temporarily excuse yourself, using the correct utensil and using it correctly even for different seafoods, and using your bread plate properly, etc.) over the years has really paid off.  Dd is 9 now and she does have very good table manners.  I think at 2, not putting your feet on the table is a good rule, but the rules should change as children grow.  As they get older, the expectations should grow as well.  It seems all too often that table manners is no longer a priority and I think it's a crying shame.  The rules should, IMO, be dynamic based on age and ability.  At 9, we now expect dd to act just like a mannered adult would at the table, but it's been years of gently teaching her the "rules" to get there.

*************Standing ovation*****************

I insist on table manners.  My kids might not know about a bread plate, but they certainly know to stay at the table, chew w/their mouths shut, don't interrupt, use their napkin and utensils properly, elbows/feet/heads/knees/tongues off the table, etc....And the trying foods....oh my gosh, yes.  I absolutely insist after they stop having breastmilk for their main nutrition, that they try things.  Just one bite.  If they really don't like it, fine, AFTER the one (decent) bite.  Everything they like, they must at least eat one bite per year of age of each item on their plate.  My kids now clean their plates w/no problems, no matter what's on it.  Except for one who has sensory issues to a degree and can't stand eggs, or "sauce" if you call it "gravy".  My kids LOVE to try new foods.  The only downfall to this is that they love my cooking so much that once in a while I get frustrated that no one will give me new meal ideas (I rarely make the same thing twice in a 6 month period).  They just expect me to come up w/something they'll love.