I am in a power struggle with my nine year old today. It's time to do some chores and tidy up around the house, and she is mad. I asked her to take the bathroom garbage out, and she dumped it upside down leaving stuff scattered over the floor. She did take the nearly empty garbage bag out.. but the stuff was scattered everywhere. Telling her she needed to clean up the trailings was met with attitude.
Moving along, she was asked to help pick up the living room. Again, not met with favor, she began to sulk and grumble. Now, we pick up the living room a few times a day, so it really wasn't too much, it was straightening some art stuff she had used and picking up scattered toys. Clearing everything off the floor so I could vacuum- pretty easy stuff. I worked in the kitchen while she was to be doing this work. I checked in with her about 10 minutes later to find one toy picked up, and absolutely nothing else done. I reminded her of what she needed to do, and was met with frustration and resistance.
It's like pulling teeth right now to get her to help out at all, and I am very frustrated. It is SO tempting to scream at her and tell her to do it now or else! (Or else what, I don't know... I mean.. really? We aren't going to be playing until the work is done so the longer she dawdles the longer she goes without getting to go outside to play or use her DS or anything else 'fun' .)
I know that I could just do it myself in just a few minutes. I could, and I wouldn't be sooo frustrated, but I don't think that not having her participate in household chores is the right approach. In our family, we all work together, I don't want to set the precedent that if you resist enough Mom will come do it for you.
