Preparing to TTC: WWYD?

[XanaduMama]

My SIL is planning to start TTC their first in around a year from now . This got me thinking: if you knew you were going to start TTC in a year, what would you do to prepare? She's already reading up about birth, parenting etc, but I was thinking more about physical preparation. I have some ideas of my own (eliminating plastics, going organic, etc), but what would you include on a list of ways to get your body ready to conceive, develop and carry a healthy beautiful baby?

[jeninejessica]

I would obviously start taking vitamins, but also get more used to eating some of the super healthy foods if you don't already. I kept trying to change my eating and never really succeeded. I would have gotten myself into a good exercise program, since it's better to start before a pregnancy, and then continue, rather than start during pregnancy. 

I had some blood tests done to check some of the basics like my iron, thyroid, blood sugars etc etc to make sure I was healthy that way, but she also ran titers to make sure I had immunity to a few of the big pregnancy no-no's like chicken pox, rubella, etc. That way if there was anything I didn't have an immunity to, I could make sure to get it before I was pregnant. (I plan on delaying/declining vaccinations with our children, but I'm fine with them on my own stronger adult body).

I would take time to really pamper and treasure my body. I had several "resolutions" last year that were totally trivial, but very nice, and things that have certainly gotten pushed to the side now that I'm pregnant and nauseas all the time. Things like changing my toenail polish once a week, every week, for six months, or shaving my legs every day for a month, or putting lotion on my whole body after every shower for six months straight. Like I said, they were all totally trivial, but it was nice to feel pampered and pretty, and it started some good habits as well. I feel better when I take care of myself, and during pregnancy sometimes you'll do anything to feel better just for a little while, you know?

Definately going organic for food, or cutting out plastic are good ideas. We didn't cut out plastic, but have committed to switching to glass almost exclusively after the baby is born. 

I would start saving money too. A set amount each month, it doesn't have to be big, but it's nice to have "baby money" so when you find items you just 'have to have' even though you know they're frivilous, you don't have to feel bad, because you've already saved the money for it. 

[Jaimee]

These are great ideas! You might want to try cross posting in the TTC forum, too.  I second the following ideas:

*Starting an exercise program b/c you can continue to do almost anything while pregnant that your body is already used to (eg. running, not high impact sports)

*Change diet to organic, lots of greens, lean meats (if she eats meat), whole grains, etc. b/c if she's hit with horrible morning sickness the body feeds off of its reserves

*Take prenatal vitamins with folic acid

*Cut out caffeine, alcohol, etc. Daddy too! (3 months prior to ttc)

*Look into alternatives to medicines so that you have a tool box of things to try while pregnant and nursing (eg. neti pot for allergies)

*Green up the house and your lifestyle with safe cleaning products, glass, reusable items, etc.

*Look into baby products, parenting techniques that you might not know much about like cloth diapering, elimination communication, babywearing, gentle discipline, baby-led weaning, breastfeeding, playful parenting, etc.

*Look into your birth options in the area and research those you don't know as much about (eg. home birth, free standing birth centers)

*Learn how to chart!

[Mama Metis]

One thing I did that I think has been incredibly helpful... I rearranged my work schedule so that it was more conducive to me getting a full night's rest every night. It has made a huge difference in my pregnancy. The few times I was not well-rested, I didn't cope nearly as well with morning sickness and other pregnancy symptoms. Also, being in great physical shape is so important! 

[jeninejessica]

^^^ Yeah that!!

I had just started a new job when we decided to TTC, and I didn't have the ability to change my work schedule. Now I've been doing midnight shifts since December, and it's wreaking havoc on my life. I definately wish I had been able to get myself into a better sleep pattern. 

[EnchantedMamma]

Not health related, but I would schedule some 'dates' with my husband (movies, bars, dancing, etc), a vacation or three if possible (big or mini - we did Hawaii), and any other fun outings that might go on temporary hiatus after baby arrives.

For health, I would start drinking Red Raspberry Leaf tea, take prenatals, lose any weight desired, do some strength training/core exercises, and stay hydrated.

Oh, and find a good chiropractor! Mine is priceless. You want someone you trust, who also handles prenatal care.

I wouldn't worry about too much else. For my second child I was very glad that I had lost a little weight and had a good strong stomach/back (thanks to hauling my 2.5 yr old around...).

Wish I'd had a good round of margaritas with the girls, but other than that I was pretty happy and healthy! :)

[Smokering]

Dental work - maybe replacing mercury fillings, or just getting stuff done that requires anaesthetic or dubious medication of any kind.

I don't know if I believe in going on detox diets/cleanses, but a year prior to TTC would probably be the best time to do one, if she were so inclined. That'd give her plenty of time afterwards to rebuild and rebalance her nutrient stores, do some intensive pre-conception nutrition and so on.

Saving up money is a good idea! She could start setting some aside NOW for a doula, hiring a birth tub, getting a postpartum cleaning lady, a diaper service (or just a really awesome set of cloth nappies!), or a nest egg so her DH could take some unpaid leave if his work doesn't give him a generous paternity leave... or, indeed, more time off work for her (if she's not planning to SAH). It's not exactly physical preparation, but it could make a big difference to her physically later on - things like herbal sitz bath remedies, decent vitamin D supplements, even loose-leaf raspberry leaf tea and so on can really add up! (Says the woman who spent way, way too much this week at the herbal shop...)

Most forms of exercise can be continued, but not started, during pregnancy. So she could start Pilates now and keep doing it (in a modified form) all throughout pregnancy if she liked; but if she decided at 5 months' gestation that she wanted to take up Pilates, she'd have to do a much more restricted form. So if she feels inclined to take up yoga, Pilates, general gym-going or whatever, she should start at least a few months before TTC.

And yes, charting! She has a year to plan, so she may as well get on with the TTC bit when it comes round, right? :p Charting could easily mean the difference between getting pregnant the first month and waiting for four or five. And if she starts now she can pick up any potential problems, like a short luteal phase or whatever, and save herself a lot of time and grief later on. Of course, I say that as a somewhat obsessive-compulsive person... if she has a more relaxed approach to TTC and is willing to just wait and see when a baby shows up, that's fine. I like the control-freak aspect, myself. :p

Oh, yeah - and if she wants to do anything like ice skating, performing in a musical, skydiving, backpacking around Europe etc, she should do it NOW!

[XanaduMama]

These are all such wonderful suggestions--thank you! Please keep them coming!

[erigeron]

Personally, I'd relax about it--that's all I really did other than taking vitamins. Others' mileage may vary. I know that I have always found the "You have to prepare in these 8 zillion ways WAY FAR IN ADVANCE or your baby will be born with horns" rhetoric to be offputting and stress-inducing. And I think that not being stressed out and worrying is far more valuable for my future and the baby's than just about any other life change I could have hypothetically made 1 year out. On the other hand, if your SIL is more of the mindset of "Whoo-hoo, I'm so looking forward to this, and now I have plenty of time and incentive to make some changes I wanted to make anyway!" and feels positive about it, more power to her. I'd just hate for her to feel like she's already behind the eight ball before she even tries to conceive. 'Cause, really, either way things have a way of working out.

One thing that occurs to me that is not so physical is that if she or her husband are putting off any really huge projects, they might want to give some thought to if/how they are going to get them done, since they will never have more time than they have before baby comes. My husband never finished his dissertation and when we started talking about having kids, I pointed out that he really should either finish it before we had any, since it would NOT get any easier, or throw in the towel and decide not to finish it. Well, he doesn't like making decisions so he stonewalled me, but our daughter is due in a month so it's safe to say that he's not going to finish it. Oh well, at least I said my piece.

[jeninejessica]

Originally Posted by erigeron 

Personally, I'd relax about it--that's all I really did other than taking vitamins. Others' mileage may vary. I know that I have always found the "You have to prepare in these 8 zillion ways WAY FAR IN ADVANCE or your baby will be born with horns" rhetoric to be offputting and stress-inducing. And I think that not being stressed out and worrying is far more valuable for my future and the baby's than just about any other life change I could have hypothetically made 1 year out. On the other hand, if your SIL is more of the mindset of "Whoo-hoo, I'm so looking forward to this, and now I have plenty of time and incentive to make some changes I wanted to make anyway!" and feels positive about it, more power to her. I'd just hate for her to feel like she's already behind the eight ball before she even tries to conceive. 'Cause, really, either way things have a way of working out.

Good point. I'm more in the second boat, where I had been waiting so long to ttc, that feeling like I was doing -anything- towards having that baby made me feel better. But you can certainly get pregnant and have a healthy baby without accomplishing any of those 'tasks'. But they're good things to focus your mind on in the meantime if you're having trouble waiting. 

[erigeron]

I can see that. When I was waiting to try, I researched parenting and basics about infants a little, but mostly it just bummed me out because I wanted to not be waiting anymore. But then I already resented the requirements that I was under for what I had to do before I could start trying, so I probably would have bitten anybody who got up in my face about all this other stuff I had to do. Hehe.

[diana_of_the_dunes]

All of the PPs have really good suggestions about what to do.  The only thing I really, really wish I'd have done before TTC #1 is finish our house.  We have an older home that we're working to restore/renovate, and it's been mostly on hold since we've had DS.  We've gotten a few things accomplished here and there, but I feel like we're never going to be done (especially with #2 OTW).  I also wish I'd gone to visit my friend in Japan.  She is leaving this August, and I know I can't travel that far with my super-busy toddler.  We'd never survive the flight.  So...  Travel and finish any big projects!

[InspiredCT]

Thank you XanaduMama for starting this feed for me and for the great advice coming from it.

After reading through some of these suggestions we have decided to draw up a list of things to do before baby. I have also been giving the planning elements quite a bit of thought such as birthing options, saving for various things and how to prepare my body.

We are both very excited to start TTC in a year or so, and have been discussing it quite a bit. What the expectation would be from each other. How ideally we would like handle different situations when baby arrives. Really I'm just excited to get going and to start a family

Thank I would appreciate as much advice as you have to give

[XanaduMama]

Yay!