My husband recently pointed out to me that I have spent years trying to be a better parent. I've read scores of books, hung out online in places like these... Devoted lots of energy to it.
And, um, a lot less energy to getting along well with him. We've been together for long enough that I thought we had it all worked out. And ok, we get on each other's nerves a lot, but it didn't seem bad to me. He thinks we should both be thinking harder about it. So, I figure if I can put so much effort into parenting I could put some more effort into being a better partner.
Can anyone recommend some resources? Books? Websites? I'm especially interested in communicating better and not being defensive - we both appear threatening to the other one on a regular basis, and the offending party is usually clueless, like 'what did I say?' but very quickly leaping to defend what s/he said to the hurt party. It usually escalates. It's not terrible, but it's not great.
Thank you for any suggestions you may have.