Paige it sounds like you are figuring things out! And with so much time to spare too :) I can relate to your dilemma altho circumstance and history is a bit different. I hemorrhaged due to excessive medical interventions including extensive vaginal lacerations(episiotomies) But luckily did not need any transfusions, and did not suffer a seizure. I can imagine how scary that must have been tho! I did have a seizure years ago in the middle of a blood donation session, eek!) I felt so weird and nauseas long afterwards but did not feel traumatized really whereas my sister who had witnessed it was extremely terrified! haha..
Originally Posted by kama'aina mama
What "feels right"? Interesting. I have felt, since I became pregnant, that it fell to me to do what actually IS right, sometimes without regard to my feelings. And to be honest I do judge parents who put their own feelings ahead of their kids needs... and I would judge myself even more harshly if I ever did.
"Do what feels right." Fascinating.
Are you sure you are not taking this out of context? Elizabeth can correct this if I'm wrong, but I read "do what feels right" to mean "do what you feel IS right" or more specifically "do what IS right for your specific situation" which is very different from putting your own feelings ahead of a child's needs.
I think maybe the usage of the word feeling might be causing a misunderstanding here?
Is a feeling a helpful impression which can aid us in making wise decisions? Maybe, because it is a simple thought that sums up all the complex factors of an individual's circumstances which are more or less floating around in their minds(consciously and subconsciously)? I think so, and these strong 'feelings' are often considered intuition.
Or are feelings something totally separate from reality and what "IS right" Do you use the term to refer to pleasure?
"Do what actually IS right..without regard to [your] feelings" Fascinating. I mean, how is it that you decide what IS right? I personally heavily rely on my feelings to tell me what is right in specific/unique situations...But then if you mean, "Do what actually IS right..without regard to your own pleasure" Then YES. I totally agree and I'm pretty certain Paige, and all the UC mom's here would agree.
One thing we both definitely agree on is that I too would judge myself very harshly if I put my own feelings(if you are using this term to mean pleasures) ahead of my childrens needs. Heck I would feel awful if I put my feelings(emotional needs) ahead of my children's feelings...BUT how does this thread have anything to do with that?
The OP is definitely not putting her child's needs second to anything. I think what is best for her situation can only be decided by her, and what is best for her situation will ultimately be best for everyone concerned. Just my own opinion. But I do believe if something TRULY feels right (feels right. different than feeling pleasurable) then it most likely is right and the right choice for all involved.
Edited by sunshinemoma - 5/23/11 at 3:23pm