Is There A Way To Prevent A Thread From Being "Featured" on Facebook? - Page 6

[swede]

Originally Posted by Cynthia Mosher 

Thank you all for your input and for assuming the best of us and our intentions. We've featured threads for awhile now and we never meant to hide the fact that we were doing so on Facebook and Twitter. It didn't even cross our minds that it would be viewed in the way some of you have expressed. 

Doing things to get traffic to the site is certainly something we put our efforts into and while the revenue we gain is certainly beneficial to keep the site running, Mothering's primary purpose on the web is to spread the word of Natural Family Living and Attachment Parenting and to be a place of resource, information and support for parents. That is the main drive behind what we do. We use what resources we can that do not cost us money ( our budget is slim and with having to close the magazine I'm sure you can all appreciate that fact). Social media is now a big piece of marketing your site for lots of websites. We really had no idea this would be such an issue for some of you and I'm sorry we didn't consider it more carefully and discuss it with you beforehand.

We appreciate all of the ideas and suggestions as well as the concern about privacy and opt-in. We've come up with a number of alternative ways to feature MDC on Mothering's Twitter and Facebook, one being our Question of the Day thread that is featured on the Community homepage. It is a discussion we start every day so it is Mothering-initiated. We will no longer feature member-started threads on Facebook and Twitter. If for some reason we do decide a thread is important and we want to feature it we will request permission from the person who started the thread. 

Does that cover everyone's concerns? 

Thank you!

[dairy2dogs]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cynthia Mosher 

We appreciate all of the ideas and suggestions as well as the concern about privacy and opt-in. We've come up with a number of alternative ways to feature MDC on Mothering's Twitter and Facebook, one being our Question of the Day thread that is featured on the Community homepage. It is a discussion we start every day so it is Mothering-initiated. We will no longer feature member-started threads on Facebook and Twitter. If for some reason we do decide a thread is important and we want to feature it we will request permission from the person who started the thread. 

Does that cover everyone's concerns? 

Thank you.

If you get permission from the person who started the tread will it then be flagged or the posters who replied to the OP be notified somehow so we will have the option to not reply or remove our replies if we feel the need? 
 

[HappyMommy2]

Originally Posted by Cynthia Mosher 

Thank you all for your input and for assuming the best of us and our intentions. We've featured threads for awhile now and we never meant to hide the fact that we were doing so on Facebook and Twitter. It didn't even cross our minds that it would be viewed in the way some of you have expressed. 

Doing things to get traffic to the site is certainly something we put our efforts into and while the revenue we gain is certainly beneficial to keep the site running, Mothering's primary purpose on the web is to spread the word of Natural Family Living and Attachment Parenting and to be a place of resource, information and support for parents. That is the main drive behind what we do. We use what resources we can that do not cost us money ( our budget is slim and with having to close the magazine I'm sure you can all appreciate that fact). Social media is now a big piece of marketing your site for lots of websites. We really had no idea this would be such an issue for some of you and I'm sorry we didn't consider it more carefully and discuss it with you beforehand.

We appreciate all of the ideas and suggestions as well as the concern about privacy and opt-in. We've come up with a number of alternative ways to feature MDC on Mothering's Twitter and Facebook, one being our Question of the Day thread that is featured on the Community homepage. It is a discussion we start every day so it is Mothering-initiated. We will no longer feature member-started threads on Facebook and Twitter. If for some reason we do decide a thread is important and we want to feature it we will request permission from the person who started the thread. 

Does that cover everyone's concerns? 

Wow, thank you.  I think your response will go a long way towards making us long time members feel heard.  Thank you!

I would still like to see the ones you do post online to show up a different color... maybe you could add that to the development roadmap????
 

[BarefootScientist]

I feel like I've explained this ad naseum but here's the difference ... again... to me between mothering posting threads on facebook and threads showing up on google.

1) Someone has to search google for specific information, not just randomly see it show up in their news feed.
2) Mothering itself was posting the threads, it's not just a feature of the internet.
3) People can't comment on google.
4) People who do not have facebook had no idea their threads were being discussed on facebook.

To me, it's an obvious feature of the internet that people are going to be able to search for stuff and come up with results from message boards. It's not an obvious feature of the internet that the message board itself takes your posts and tweets them out to everyone who happens to follow them, inviting them to discuss it on a different site, without your permission or knowledge.

Make sense?

[Linda on the move]

Originally Posted by dawningmama 


I quite clearly said that I didn't mean it to be snarky but I realized it might be read that way.

I do not represent mothering in this regard. I was speaking of my own experience and understanding of online social networking. I apologize if that was unclear.

several of us aren't on Facebook because of specific choices we have consciously made. After we said that, saying that we should just check Facebook was very odd. It's like you really couldn't get out of your own point of view enough to listen.

I'm happy with Mothering.com's decision in how to go forward.

[KempsMama]

What I would like to know is why is it acceptable for the self appointed privacy police to derail several discussions by continuing to post an obnoxious post stating the thread is featured on FB.  Seriously, it's really unnerving and irritating to see good discussions killed by this drivel. 

[mumkimum]

Just wanting to share that I appreciate the change and response about thread use among other social media.  

[philomom]

Originally Posted by HappyMommy2 

I would still like to see the ones you do post online to show up a different color... maybe you could add that to the development roadmap????
 

Yes, I had that thought just as I was about to go to sleep last night. I want to know which threads have "gone Fboook" so I have a chance to edit my posts.


And yes, a world of difference between someone googling for information than to have your firends and family see that you nursed a toddler or you are thinking about in-laws in unfavorable ways.

[philomom]

Originally Posted by KempsMama 

What I would like to know is why is it acceptable for the self appointed privacy police to derail several discussions by continuing to post an obnoxious post stating the thread is featured on FB.  Seriously, it's really unnerving and irritating to see good discussions killed by this drivel. 

Actually, I appreciated the tip offs last night very much as this all came to head.

Some of us have deliberately chosen not to be a part of the larger Fbook...... we deserve to have our choices remain intact.

[azgirl]

Originally Posted by katelove 

And will that thread then be flagged in some way so that the rest of the posters, not just the OP, know that it has gone on FB/Twitter?

To answer the PP who asked about the difference between FB and Google, this is what it is for me...

1. I knew MDC appeared on Google searches. I'm pretty sure that's how I found it. So it was a case of being forewarned about that. It's always in the back of my mind when I post.

2. I feel like Google is an extra degree of separation from my real life compared to FB. Someone who knows me who stumbled across a post of mine while searching Google may not put it together that I was the person they know IRL but if they see a post of mine *from* my FB newsfeed it's just that little bit more likely that they'll put two and two together KWIM. It may not be a wholely rational concern but that's my issue.

This all makes total sense. I am not worried about it because I don't let everyone on FB know everything I "like" and I don't link my FB to mothering. Even if my threads showed up on the Mothering FB page that would not link in any way to my FB page. It's two totally separate things isn't it? Maybe I am misunderstanding something still...There is a an opt-in currently to link your mothering account to your facebook account, right? And then if they are linked people on your FB page see what you post on mothering? And if one of your posts is featured on the mothering page, it would link directly back to you? It was my impression that if I don't connect to mothering on FB or link my FB account to mothering, the mothering posts that show up on FB or Twitter are no more traceable to me than a Google search. Am I understanding all of this correctly?

I don't connect any of my internet activity to my FB because I don't want people knowing what I do with my time on the interwebs. So, I would be mortified if I was automatically linked to my posts on Mothering.com...This happened to me when I signed into Urban Spoon on my iphone using my FB account (my first and only time doing this) I thought it was just a way to skip a new registration process. It automatically added my review to my facebook page. That bugged me, so I went into the settings and my reviews do not automatically post on FB...

Thanks for explanation. It is still my impression that the privacy-weakening "linking" was already opt-in (linking your personal FB account to your  mothering acccount??)  But, since there may not be a clear explanation or understanding of what happens when you link FB to mothering...one could really become less private without meaning to...like I did with the Urban Spoon iPhone app...?

[azgirl]

Originally Posted by philomom 

Originally Posted by HappyMommy2 

I would still like to see the ones you do post online to show up a different color... maybe you could add that to the development roadmap????
 

Yes, I had that thought just as I was about to go to sleep last night. I want to know which threads have "gone Fboook" so I have a chance to edit my posts.


And yes, a world of difference between someone googling for information than to have your firends and family see that you nursed a toddler or you are thinking about in-laws in unfavorable ways.

Could you explain to me how having your post about nursing a toddler featured on the mothering facebook page GETS to your friends and family? And how would they know it was you? How is it automatically linked to you in any way? What am I missing here?? My friends that aren't on mothering have not "liked" the mothering fb page and do not get the news feed. I get news feed from the pages I "like" (restaurants and retail places that announce specials) but NONE of my friends see the news feed. They do see that I have "liked" that restaurant. The updates/news feed from the places I "like" do not even show up on my profile page. Only in my news feed. Even if I did "like" mothering and one of my posts showed up in the mothering fb page how would any of my friends 1. see it. 2. know it was me??

If I am understanding this incorrectly please let me know. I don't think I could stay here, even after the changes, if the situation was actually like some of you are implying it was. That by mothering posting my thread to facebook, my friends and family could see what I had posted and know it was me. I will not continue posting if that was the case. I may stop posting on the internet all together. Please explain to me how that worked!!

[Linda on the move]

Originally Posted by KempsMama 

What I would like to know is why is it acceptable for the self appointed privacy police to derail several discussions by continuing to post an obnoxious post stating the thread is featured on FB.  Seriously, it's really unnerving and irritating to see good discussions killed by this drivel. 

such a statement wouldn't de-rail the thread for those who are fine posting to both places. And people who aren't fine posting to both places have a right to know.

You have a right to say what ever you want where ever you want, but everyone else has the same rights, which include knowing where they are saying things.

[AFWife]

Originally Posted by azgirl 

Could you explain to me how having your post about nursing a toddler featured on the mothering facebook page GETS to your friends and family? And how would they know it was you? How is it automatically linked to you in any way? What am I missing here?? My friends that aren't on mothering have not "liked" the mothering fb page and do not get the news feed. I get news feed from the pages I "like" (restaurants and retail places that announce specials) but NONE of my friends see the news feed. They do see that I have "liked" that restaurant. The updates/news feed from the places I "like" do not even show up on my profile page. Only in my news feed. Even if I did "like" mothering and one of my posts showed up in the mothering fb page how would any of my friends 1. see it. 2. know it was me??

If I am understanding this incorrectly please let me know. I don't think I could stay here, even after the changes, if the situation was actually like some of you are implying it was. That by mothering posting my thread to facebook, my friends and family could see what I had posted and know it was me. I will not continue posting if that was the case. I may stop posting on the internet all together. Please explain to me how that worked!!

What you "like" on FB shows up on your info page. So, a friend on there can go "What is Mothering?" and view the FB page...if they click on the thread link and come here they may eventually put pieces together. Like, one of my family members would know I'm me based on my sig. 

[Drummer's Wife]

Though this never bothered me, I can respect that it upset other MDC members.  Thank you, Cynthia, for following up on it and respecting our community's wishes. 

If anyone is interested in which threads have been linked, here are the Twitter and Facebook pages:

http://twitter.com/motheringmag

http://facebook.com/mothering.magazine

[BarefootScientist]

Originally Posted by azgirl 

Could you explain to me how having your post about nursing a toddler featured on the mothering facebook page GETS to your friends and family? And how would they know it was you? How is it automatically linked to you in any way? What am I missing here?? My friends that aren't on mothering have not "liked" the mothering fb page and do not get the news feed. I get news feed from the pages I "like" (restaurants and retail places that announce specials) but NONE of my friends see the news feed. They do see that I have "liked" that restaurant. The updates/news feed from the places I "like" do not even show up on my profile page. Only in my news feed. Even if I did "like" mothering and one of my posts showed up in the mothering fb page how would any of my friends 1. see it. 2. know it was me??

If I am understanding this incorrectly please let me know. I don't think I could stay here, even after the changes, if the situation was actually like some of you are implying it was. That by mothering posting my thread to facebook, my friends and family could see what I had posted and know it was me. I will not continue posting if that was the case. I may stop posting on the internet all together. Please explain to me how that worked!!

If any of your friends or family also like Mothering. Or see that you like Mothering and wander over to the page.

Originally Posted by Linda on the move 

such a statement wouldn't de-rail the thread for those who are fine posting to both places. And people who aren't fine posting to both places have a right to know.

You have a right to say what ever you want where ever you want, but everyone else has the same rights, which include knowing where they are saying things.

Exactly. When is informed consent ever bad? Though admittedly I haven't been to these threads and don't know how obnoxious people are being about it. A warning strikes me as fine.

[HollyBearsMom]

thank you Cynthia!

[APToddlerMama]

Thank you for the change Cynthia.  I just noticed that many of the threads I have posted in are on Twitter.  I am not comfortable with threads I have started being posted on FB/Twitter, nor am I comfortable with threads that I have *replied* to being featured.  I strongly feel we still need a notification of threads we have replied to being featured.  In one of them, I posted very sensitive and personal information. 

And as a side note, I have to say that all of the increased advertising, etc. and focus on bringing traffic to the site seems to have really diluted the quality of posts and responses on MDC.  I don't see it as a good thing at all.  Before we know it, MDC is going to look like Yahoo Answers.  Its already starting to on many threads...  I understand there is a need to have this be profitable, but isn't there another way to do it and still preserve the community that many of us love? 

[journeymom]

Thanks for the changes made!  I agree, informed consent is always good.  I also believe that members/users should always be required to opt in, never should have to opt out of things like this.

Opt in versus opt out.  Please, MDC, choose opt in, every time. 

Yes, MDC has the legal right to use whatever material a user posts at MDC's site.  Doesn't mean there isn't a social obligation to the users to ask their permission.  It's just respectful. 

Edited by journeymom - 5/24/11 at 11:23am

[APToddlerMama]

Okay.  I just signed into FB and noticed something else reallllllllllllllllllllly unsettling.  In the Current Discussions tab on Mothering on FB, there is a list of discussions, but not only that.  It is also highlighting members changing their info.  Philomom...you're on there. Says you just changed your location. 

[Three~Little~Birds]

Thanks!!!