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2nd parent... guardian? *update* GUARDIANSHIP GRANTED!! :) - Page 2

post #21 of 34

Wehrli - Our meeting went fairly well too.  We live in a "no second parent adoption state".  However, there is precedence for joint custody/guardianship so she feels very confident about being able to get us that (which wouldn't be that bad in and of itself).  However, our situation is unique in that DW is donating her eggs and I will be carrying which is an "un-tested" situation in our state. We will likely pursue the precedent-setting option of petitioning for an "Order of Parentage" based on our status with one of us as genetic mother and the other as carrying.  The order apparently would have stronger legal standing should something happen to one of us though our day-to-day rights (e.g., medical decisions, insurance, day-care, etc.) will all be covered by the guardianship.


Kudos to you both for being willing to push the envelope!  I feel ya on the forever paying for this part of it.  It is going to hurt but we feel like it is worth it.  Some lawyers are brave and willing to offer a break on the cost for precedent-setting situations in an effort to do the right thing and work to change unfair laws.  I am wondering if that would be an option - either with your existing lawyer or another in the area??

post #22 of 34

Yeah, on the lawyer note, just wanted to add that we did our second parent adoption when we were broke grad students, and qualified for a free lawyer through the state Bar Association's volunteer lawyer program. As it happens, the *best* LGBT rights attorney in our (former) state ended up taking the case, so we got great service for no cost. It was really a blessing, since we could not have afforded to pay out of pocket.

post #23 of 34
Thread Starter 

the judge was fair and everything went without a hitch! orngbiggrin.gif
post #24 of 34

Wonderful News!!  Congratulations!!

post #25 of 34

Yay!!!!  Wehrli, this is such fantastic news for you and your family.  Way to go!!!!  Congrats!!!! love.gif joy.gif love.gif joy.gif love.gifjoy.gif

post #26 of 34
So glad to hear this! What fantastic news! joy.gif
post #27 of 34

That's awesome!!

post #28 of 34
Yay! That's great news. It must be such a relief. joy.gif
post #29 of 34

Congrats to you all.

post #30 of 34
Thread Starter 
thanks everyone! it's the best thing we can accomplish here... we definitely just made it easier for those who come after us.
post #31 of 34

Wehrli - CONGRATS!!! So thrilled for you. Too bad you can't throw it in your Gov's face! (Our sucks too!) How did the process work? Did you simply go before the judge or did you have to go through with signing over your legal rights, etc?  Did you have to go to Madison to do so or was it done in Racine? So thrilled for you guys, and little mister! We have a meeting with our attorney the week of June 20. I am very nervous - it's the south! Ugh!

post #32 of 34
Thread Starter 
2ez, i got to maintain all of my maternal rights while DP is co-guardian. i guess the law states that a judge can write up a guardianship any way s/he chooses. so we hired a lawyer from madison, she traveled to racine and we all went before the judge. the guardian ad litem was also there. the judge was really cool, she recognized that we would probably get married and do a second parent adoption if we could. we were in and out of the court room in 25 minutes!

best of luck with the meeting with your attorney! and thanks for your support!
post #33 of 34

I live in Madison and am looking for an attorney.  Who did you use?  I am really frustrated with this state and our LACK of rights.  I know a judge in La Crosse that grants second-parent adoptions even though they are not legal...but if they are contested they probably would not hold up.  I have also heard of parentage, but recent cases have caused them to be illegal as well.  I am really interested to learn about co-guardianship!



post #34 of 34
Thread Starter 
chatnat, Law Center for Kids, Emily Dudak Taylor

good luck!
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