Co-sleeping, but would like to be able to stay up after baby falls asleep... - Page 2

[asraidevin]

Get your arm out from under the head before baby is asleep. Wait until baby falls off the breast and then 5 more minutes before moving an inch (that way if they aren't fully asleep you are ready to stick that nipple back in). Move away slowly. Tuck a pillow beside baby so it's like someone is there. I cant always get away from him. Some nights hes out in 10 minutes, other nights hes up 4 times in a half hour.

As for falling off the bed, I never worried about this. After reading some comments on it, I asked my DH if I should be worried. Children have the same ability as adults not to fall off the edge. Unless your child is a BIG restless sleeper, I wouldn't worry. I keep him in the middle as well and never go  out of ear shot (if I'm in ear shot I can get there fast enough to stop him from crawling off the edge).

[nm7300]

Update from OP...

I tried nursing him in a chair, but that didn't work, unfortunately. So I am still either nursing him in bed or while walking. (I used to have him in the Ergo during naps, but he's gotten too heavy, and anyway, I could never sit down w/o waking him up...and boy, do I not want to have to stand for an hour after a long day at work!)

The advice above about just nursing him back to sleep after the first wake-up was actually really helpful! The other night, he woke up after about 20 minutes, I ran in & nursed him, slinked out when he was asleep again, and he slept for several hours!

Of course, we've had lots of other nights when he woke up every 30 minutes all night long (like last night, ugh) & so there was no staying-up (or sleeping, for that matter) for me. But even with the occasional night "away," I am feeling a bit less frustrated, which is good.

Thanks to all...and keep those tips coming! :)

[KayPea]

My husband also got me a second-hand i-Pod Touch so that I would have something to do in the dark in bed (once DD was asleep, but not ready to unlatch. This is usually 20 mins or so) This had helped me stay sane. 

[mamayogibear]

As long as my 9 month old son has something to hug that smells like me he'll stay asleep, for a while at least. I usually give him a hoodie tied up into the hood so it's like the size of a small pillow or I put one of my tanktops on a teddy bear like a dress. If I just give him a pillow or stuffy he will wrestle with it and wake up but if I give him something that smells like me he stays sleeping. My dd, 3.5 yrs, on the other hand is in her own time zone and if she wants to wake up she wakes up no matter what, I just hope she doesn't wake up my son at the same time!

[grlprpl19]

touch.  when my baby wakes often when i leave, i stay in bed and make sure he's touching me somehow.  even if it's my arm, leg, his foot against my leg or something, it seems to help him know i'm there.  also, being close by allows him to go back to sleep if he happens to wake and look for me.  he wakes up fully i he opens his eyes and i'm not around.  but he only gets like that once in a while.  hope that helps. 

[hildare]

i don't know when i would clean the kitchen if i couldn't get up when dd went to sleep!  eep! 

i've been getting up after she dropped off since before she was 10 mos old.  it's not as easy for my dh to do. 

what helps us: 

-the white noise machine

-waiting until she's in the "limp limb" (sears term) phase of sleep.  if you can move your little one's arm and it's pretty limp, then you are good to go.  if there's resistance/movement, the babe isn't sleeping deeply enough to get away.

i kind of will move away in small increments.. move my upper body away slightly, then wait a minute or so and then move the rest, scooting over a bit, and waiting.  if there's not a reaction then i'll roll away and am up and out! 

the waking after 20 minutes will eventually stop, but just repeat the getting away cycle till then...

and dd never fell off our (high) bed except the one time i accidentally pushed her.. we have a thick rug beside the bed for that reason, too...

[bluekangaroo2]

Hello EarthBirthLady,  Our son sounds a lot like your child, except he's 17 months and has NEVER slept through the night.  He still nurses and we co-sleep.  Maybe 2 months ago, he went from waking once or twice a night to nurse to every 45 minutes or so and crying loudly.  We found that he was getting all four first molars as well as 6 other teeth, simultaneously!  Awful for the poor thing, I think.  He has since pulled through and has all those teeth now and is back to sleeping better!  This too, shall pass ;)

[Ginger Bean]

My son goes in phases. Until he was around 7 months old, he had no problem at all sleeping alone for long stretches in our bed. I'd even unlatch before he was totally asleep, and he'd suck his thumb to sleep. Or sometimes (this was when he was around 3-4 months old), he'd want to play with me rather than sleep, so I would just leave him -- and he'd babble to himself while staring at his hands and actually fall asleep! Then he developed separation anxiety when he turned 7mo... and nothing has been the same since.

Now I just creep away slowly, bit by bit. Also, I start to move my body away (like my legs) before he's asleep, so I'm not all snuggled up against him when he does fall asleep. Then I just go in at 20 minutes, 40 minutes, 1 hour, whatever, and nurse him again -- it's usually just a quick top-up and not difficult like putting him down in the first place. These days it's about 60-90 minutes. The days of every 20 minutes until I come to bed are over, thank goodness.

On the other hand, getting him to go to bed in the first place has become a nightmare now that he's 9mo. We'll be nursing lying down, and he'll flip on his front and try to stand up, pushing on my chest&stomach as support -- while trying to stay latched! If I lay him back down, he throws a tantrum. Fun times.

He's more clingy for naps than nightsleep. I can hardly get away. Sometimes I just nap with him or read a book.

P.S. I have a Snug Tuck pillow on his side of the bed, and I put my head pillows on my edge when I'm not there. When he wakes, he either lies there and waits for me, or he crawls to the edge of the pillows and waits. I don't know if he has a sense of the edge, or if I just respond quick. I've been trying to teach him about edges -- I don't know if he really understands. Anyway, he's never rolled off the bed or crawled off.