Hi! We live in downtown Pawcatuck (Westerly-Pawcatuck share a cute little downtown area even though its 2 states). A lot of people hang out in Wilcox park, there are plays and summer concerts there, Westerly library is really nice, and there is Herbwise if you are looking for natural foods/herbs http://www.herbwisenaturals.com/
Perks and Corks in downtown Westerly is a good place to have a coffee or a good glass of wine, and they have live music just about every night.
Here is another link http://www.westerlydowntown.com/index.html
The downtown itself is very walkable but once you get out of that area it's like every other New England town with limited public transportation/crazy drivers. There is RIPTA bus service down here on the Westerly side, you would have to look up the schedule I'm not sure where it goes or how often it runs.
We have seen Dr. Stokes for a few years now. He is ok with non/selective vaxxing and very supportive of extended breastfeeding and natural birth. He is located on Beach St.
Speaking of the beach, you'd be very close it so when in doubt just head to the beach :) Watch Hill is nice and they have a carousel for the kids and a relatively tame beach
The commute to Norwich (I work in that area as well) will probably be a solid 35-40 minutes depending on where you are. I've tried several different routes and it always seems to be around that.
Someone upthread mentioned Wakefield which is really lovely, oh how I love Wakefield. It's a sucky commute to Norwich though, I used to live there too.
PM me if you move here and want to get together, I have a LO the same age as your oldest.