I am in Canada, so gun ownership isn't quite the same issue here. I don't allow toy guns for my children. No water guns or nerf guns either. Occasionally they will receive toys that have guns (like robots with weapons, etc). I don't take those things away, but they are not allowed to pretend to shoot people. I strongly oppose guns and therefore I feel it is important to uphold my beliefs in my home. I do allow sword play, it seems more historical and it isn't as though sword violence is an epidemic. Only two of my children have any desire to participate in that sort of play (the other two hate anything they consider to be violent play). I don't make a big deal of it, or sermonize anytime my 7 year old pretends to shoot me. He likes to test his boundaries and he understands my feelings on guns as I answer him simply and honestly when he asks. I just say, "you shot me with LOVE" and smother him with kisses. It gets boring for him fast. I don't want to make it more desirable by making a big deal of it.
Â
I do allow them to play with toy guns at other people's houses. But no violent movies or video games. I feel moderation and me sticking to my principles will guide them more than making a big deal of it.
Â
I grew up with guns in the house. My dad used to hunt, but at some point it began to feel wrong to him so he quit. He was very big on gun safety, he felt it was important that we learned too. My brothers had an assortment of bb and pellet guns. We grew up watching action movies and emulating what we saw. One day we played hijacker. I was the 'bad guy' and I was trying to hijack the bus (our old camperized school bus). My brother, the bus driver, pulled out his gun to protect his passengers.....a pellet gun that had been loaded with bbs. It was supposed to be empty and the safety was on but it went off and he shot me in the face. I still have the bb in my cheek, it shows up on dental x-rays. The nurse in the ER said her brother shot her with a pellet gun when she was young too. My dentist told me he has seen LOTS of people with bbs that show up on dental x-rays. It isn't like this was a scaring or traumatic event, in fact it is kind of a family joke now that we are grown. But it does remind me that even good, rule following, naturally cautious kids can do some pretty stupid things.
Â
I think we can't always expect kids to use common sense and good judgment all the time. Even the kids who normally are rule followers (like I was). Guns are guns. Toys are toys. Other families choose differently, and they are exposed to toy guns in some of the houses they visit.  Most people we know tend to feel like I do though, so it isn't really a big issue most of the time. We just discuss it as it comes up.
. The point I think is that they learn things like sustaining yourself (hunting) protecting your loved ones (self defense) or discipline (practice/ martial arts) and not that violence is cool and fun.
