Sleep Fighter!

[strmis]

DD is 35 mos and fights sleep .. . to the brutal end most times.  She even fights it in the car now (which used to easily put her to sleep). 

I'm trying to get her to sleep either on her own, or close to it. We are expecting DD2 in a few months and I don't know if I can handle the stress of putting 2 kids to bed.  As it is, our routine goes dinner, play a little, upstairs for bath, jammies, brush teeth, bedtime stories and finally... BED, which sometimes includes 5 mins of nursing and 10 mins of laying with her which usually ends up being closer to 20-40 mins of laying with her fighting sleep.  She tosses and rolls around, asks for this, that and the other, wants to hold hands, which I don't mind but it gets tiring for me too!

I've tried putting her down as early as 7pm and as late as 930 and that doesnt seem to work.  All in all, by the time we get upstairs it takes over an hour to get her down! Any suggestions??? This is just nuts!

[AKislandgirl]

I have a sleep fighter too. Some nights are easier then others but we have had some major improvements by coming up with a routine and sticking to it. I read the No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers. It had ideas not only about bed time but other times of the day which may ultimately help once bedtime rolls around. I really liked the book.

Does she still nap? I'm finding that although my DD needs a nap most days it leads to harder and later bedtimes. I'd love to skip them but she's just not quite ready. Does she respond to your partner putting her down? Mine doesn't but we are hoping to ease into that this summer. No advice on how to go about that though! Our routine is similar to yours but maybe you need to change it. Since it seems its not working anymore anyway I'd try something new. Do you think the bath really relaxes her or is she getting more amped up from it?

Hope you find something that works! Good luck!

[lifeguard]

Ds is a big sleep fighter. He fights & fights & then crashes in an instant.

A couple months ago we started the transition to him going to sleep on his own from one of us laying with him (I just couldn't take the 45 minutes - 2 hours anymore). I started by first warning him it was coming for a few nights (3 more nights, 2 more nights, etc.).

The first few weeks (he got sick in the middle of the process & that put us back a bit) I sat on a chair in the hallway. It sucked. It really did. It was boring - he was upset some of the time (although overall ok & anytime he was really upset I went in & "retucked" him). After that we switched to dh being in his office (right beside ds' room) & then finally after a couple more weeks we were both able to be in the livingroom.

All in all it took close to 2 months but now he goes to bed easily (most nights) & he does his sleep fighting alone. He pretty happily talks to himself, plays a bit, etc. Sometimes we go in & do a "retuck" if he is taking exceptionally long.

The bonus part is that he finally has a consistent bedtime. We tried for SO long to find the magical time that worked for him & could never seem to hit on it but for whatever reason (coincidence perhaps) he now is ready at 8:30 pretty consistently.

The big key imo was hitting this transition at a time that he was ready for it (for us that meant he was much more verbal & no longer had a major breakdown if we left the room) & really talking him through it. When he would cry I would go in & give him lots of hugs & kisses & tell him I was so proud of him, that I knew how hard it was to make changes but that I was right there & I knew he could do it. I think having the faith in him helped him have it himself. It really ended up being a gentle transition.