Want to get pregnant, but still nursing A LOT

[Granola Momma]

Hi all...

My 23-month-old son is still very dependent on nursing...especially at night. My husband and I would love to become pregnant with #2 in the next few months if possible.

I have not had a period yet, but have had some cramping over the past 6+ months. Before I conceived my first, I never had very heavy periods. A period would last a day or two at the most, so I'm wondering if that's a factor in why my period hasn't come back yet in addition to the extended breastfeeding.

All that said, I have no idea if I'm even fertile enough to conceive with how much I still nurse my son (anywhere from 6-10 times a day...2-4 of those being at night). The amount of time he spends nursing is very short...a few minutes at the most per feeding. But he still definitely needs and wants it throughout the day. He has never had a bottle and doesn't really want breast milk from any other place other than the breast.

Don't want to pressure him to wean, but am very much looking forward to becoming pregnant with a little brother or sister for my little man!

I would love to hear stories of pregnancy in the midst of nursing a 2-year-old and any advice you might have.

Thank you all so much...so thankful for the community here!

[coldandsleepy]

My son is just about 20 months old, and before this month (when he's been in daycare and thus necessarily taking a break for 9 hrs!), he was still nursing about every 2 hours all day long.  AND nursing 2 or so times a night, plus a really big feed when he first wakes up in the morning.  And despite his love of BF, I still managed to conceive last month.  

In my case, I have had my periods back for a long time... about 4 months PP.  But I've heard from a lot of people that you don't necessarily have to have that first PP period to be fertile.  My grandmother's 3 oldest sons are each 13 months apart-- she never got her period back between babies with them.

My OB/GYN said there's some evidence that most women become fertile again when the LO goes at least 8 hrs without nursing.  (I think maybe I read that on kellymom too?)  So before you wean him altogether, maybe you could try just nightweaning him first.

Good luck with TTC, I hope it goes well for you!

[Granola Momma]

Thanks so much, coldandsleepy!

Your story encourages me and I'm definitely considering the whole night weaning thing.

Take care of yourself and thanks again for the insight!

[Emma Bryan Fuller]

My son was 18 months and  nursing constantly, barely eating solids. I never had a period and my husband was away a lot so not much chance to conceive. Also, it took a while for me to get pregnant with the 1st. Anyway, I did get pregnant and nursed through the pregnancy and went on to tandem nurse. So it certainly does happen :)  All the best to you :) 

[munchymum]

My period didn't come back until DD was 24 months.  We TTCed from that point onwards, but it seemed that DD's nursing had a major impact on my fertility and over that six month period I nightweaned, then reduced daytime feeds until she had only 2-3, totalling around 60-70 minutes a day.  Maybe that doesn't sound like such a big deal to some people, but my daughter is a seriously keen nurser and every step was hard.  But soon after the final reduction, when I dropped the evening feed  (leaving me with an 18 hour nursing-free period every day), I had a stronger ovulation (clear drying up of mucous and post-ov spotting) and conceived.  So it is possible to conceive with a nursing 2 year old even when they are avid nursers and your body is very sensitive to prolactin.

I really do wish you the best of luck.  BTW, if nightweaning sounds like an impossible concept, I know how you feel.  At 23m, my DD was not ready for it.  But suddenly at 24m she started turning away from me to go to sleep, and about 25m she started sleeping better (for 3 hour stretches!).  So in our case, passing 24m was naturally a time when DD became a more independent sleeper.  I guess this happens at a different age for everyone, and I hope you start seeing some signs soon.

[dejagerw]

You could try starting up Vitex, or another similar supplement to see if you can get things going in the fertility department.

[Bald_Bull's_Mama]

I started really wanting to get pregnant again, starting when DS was 18 mos. He was a mega nurser and AF didn't come back until he was a bit over 2. He was 2.5 when we conceived. I am really so glad at how the timing worked out. Nursing was really uncomfortable for me during the first trimester and, by that time, DS was verbal enough to understand cutting back, then stopping night nursing. We had tried before and he was so so upset, so we stopped. This time, it was really smooth. We ended up weaning altogether at the beginning of my 2nd tri and he was really OK with it, something I don't think would've been possible when he was just a bit younger. So, my advice is to trust that the timing will work out exactly as it's supposed to. Hugs, it's hard to wait and want, I know.

[ShannonBFCDAP]

I'm only 15 months pp and I had no sign of a period either. My son had slept through the night but I still had no cycle. My husband and also want to start ttc. So I started acupuncture treatments twice a week starting three weeks ago. I just got my period today! I haven't been this excited since my first menses lol! Good luck mama.

[boomer78]

18 months pp, nursing and no pp af.   have had cramps for a few weeks, but that's about it.  I thought I wanted to start TTC.  But then I started thinking - what if my milk dries up?  I definitely want to keep on nursing dd over this coming winter.  We currently nurse about 3-4 times during the day (morning, before nap, befored bed and sometimes in between) and 2x at night.  We are down from about 9 sessions just a few days ago, DD would nurse all the time if she could.  

[Granola Momma]

Thanks mommas for all the advice!

Just to give you an update, I'm 5-1/2 weeks pregnant now. I love the Fertility Awareness Method from the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility." It helped me know exactly when I was fertile and we conceived after I only had 2 postpartum periods! 

Woohoo! The journey begins again...

[dejagerw]

Congratulations!!!