i guess my title really says it all. i just found out via my sister that my mom and grandma are planning on driving the 600 miles to come and visit right around when baby is born.... mind you, i have heard none of this.
i will totally love and appreciate the support, and i know my girlies want to see their g-ma and great g-ma---no question about that. i just want to bask in the tiny one without other obligations. i want to enjoy my babe and my girls as a very intimate family...sure, i am planning some outside help to keep some meals going and friends to come and steal the girls so it doesn't get too crazy, so i can nap, etc. but i want to be holding my baby. i have eagerly shared the births and brand newness of the others and now..... i really just want to be left alone in the garden with baby and let my girls do their thing.......they can make potions from mud, leaves and flower petals for hours.......sweet and special as time with grandma is, it also takes a lot out of me in the way of reminding them to go easy on her, and because she just doesn't get some major places that i am coming from. she tries, and that is a gift i am truly thankful for. it's just that she doesn't get it. and she smokes cigarettes. flame me if you will, but i do not want the cigarettes anywhere near me or us or especially baby. it is a major part of my m.o. right now. she's even pretty conscientious of her smoking around kids, tries to hide it and wash her hands, etc.... i am just feeling like a fierce mama bear on some of these issues.
my mom and g-ma are really sweet, will give me no flack while they visit, and will end up giving my girls the special attention they need when they need it. my mom has been there after my other kiddos were born....and it was very sweet to have her, and sort of soak up that time as well. she really was helpful. i just feel really selfish with my baby and my baby time this time around. how can i sweetly offer to them that i will need some time before i am ready for company this time around? especially considering that they are making this plan without having checked in with me at all about it?
anyone been there, done that?