here is my philosophy on things - which bless her heart my xmil helped me to see.Â
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the one whose needs has at all costs to be taken into consideration is our soul. everyday when dd was a baby she'd call me and ask me what have i done for my soul that day (marriage was on the rocks so even in a marriage i was all alone with a HNs baby and she wanted to make sure i kept my sanity). i'd tell her about what about my baby made my day and she'd tell me - no tell me what have YOU done for YOUR soul today. because i was coming from a taking care of dd perspective. teh day i told her how dd touched me emotionally she accepted.Â
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in times of stress we must grab at any source of joy. because i have discovered in my own journey - something changes within me when i take care of my soul (it doesnt matter whether u believe in god or not. by soul here i mean YOURself. and the word soul is a shortcut method for saying urself). for a few days, moments i feel so destressed. and the result. i can think more clearly and logically when i've had a break.
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the world does not look like such a hopeless place. and you know what. the answers jump out at me. AND over and over and over again things have always worked out.Â
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simple example (perhaps too simple). i have the last $ in my purse and dd asks for a mexican bakery treat. i have the money but its my last $. at first i immediately ball up and fear just wells up within me. and then i go what the heck. i am tired of living that way. and we eat and walk home and its all so beautiful and the day seems better than it is.Â
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the key is not doing it. the key is giving yourself permission to do it. and later on while doing laundry i found that dollar in a pocket. at that moment it fills me with such deep great joy that we did something when we could. both dd and i had a great time. otherwise if i hadnt and found that dollar oh man i sink to the pits of sadness. to the very depths. that i did not spend the money.Â
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i have read many first accounts from the depression when even thru the hunger and darkness - little acts of soul caring really made for wonderful moments. even, yes even at the cost of food. choosing to eat buttered toast for lunch at the cost of no dinner.Â
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so yes. do it. a holiday means more to ur family now than it has always meant. esp. if you have the money NOW.Â