So many questions about nursing/weaning my toddler now that i'm pg

[bluedaisy]

I just found out we are pregnant with #2!!!

My dd is 2 1/2 and still nurses to go to sleep, at least once in the middle of the night, and in the morning as we're waking up.  She often asks to nurse once or twice during the day as well.

I would love to hear about your experiences of nursing while pregnant - at this point, I'm not sure if I'll try to encourage weaning, try to keep my milk supply up to tandem, or just see what happens.  I'm happy I was able to bf for so long and I would be ok if my milk did dry up, as I know that often happens.  I have no idea how I'll get her to sleep without bm though! 

So here are my questions:

 Did your milk dry up?  At what point in your pg did it dry up?   How did your toddler respond to your milk drying up?

If it didn't dry up, did you do anything to encourage milk production?  Are you glad you tandem nursed or do you wish your toddler had weaned?

Did you toddler wean while you were pg?  Did you encourage it or did he/she do it on his/her own?

Thanks!!

[Marissamom]

my two are 22 months apart. my milk slowely switched to colostrum by about 20 weeks. DD didn't care, in fact, she nursed more. I did have some nipple pain, but got through it. I'm glad that I didn't wean her. she's still such a baby and needs that special protected and nurtured feeling. 

[pinky]

Have you read "Adventures in Tandem Nursing"?  It's such a great book that talks a lot about this topic.

[Springshowers]

I'm pregnant right now.. about 26 weeks. My daughter is 17 months old. I think it was about a month ago I stopped hearing her swallow. I can only express a little colostrum. She doesn't care though and still nurses to sleep. The only real change now though is if she's busy.. she will forget to nurse all day, and she sleeps longer at night too.. literally through the night unless I disturb her (we cosleep).

She did start waking in the middle of the night starving and asking for food though for a few weeks (just a few times a week) until we got the hang of making sure she was offered enough food and water in the day. It was a big change, but fairly smooth, to have her stop getting nutrition from breast milk.

[woodchick]

DD2 was conceived just after DD1's second birthday...  I continued to nurse her.  She nursed several times a day until about 14 weeks when she dropped down to only once or twice a day. I assume that my milk production dropped off. I don't know if there was just a little milk or if she was only comfort nursing but she continued to nurse a couple of times a day right up until I was in labor with her sister!  My milk came back in and I had two happy girls on my hands!

I, personally, found tandem nursing to be a godsend.  DD1 was thrilled to share her milks and was always 'teaching' DD2 how to have a good latch :)  We didn't see any jealousy or sibling rivalry at all (and boy oh boy had we been warned about it!).

[mom2threenurslings]

I have nursed 1 through one pregnancy, tandem nursed through 2 pregnancies and started one pregnancy triandem nursing and ended it tandem nursing and going on to triandem nurse. I was lucky in that my milk supply remained good throughout pregnancy. I made sure I ate enough protein and stayed well hydrated. 

I LOVED nursing through pregnancy and tandem/triandem nursing. There were the occasional times of feeling "touched out" but I figure that would happen anyway, with how cuddly all my toddlers have been  ;) . 

[bluedaisy]

Thanks for all the replies...I always assumed my milk would just dry up during pg and my dd would wean, but she is SO attached to bf that she might be one of those that just keeps sucking even if there's no milk.

Did you get comments about bf being dangerous for the baby?  I know I'm going to get this repsonse from my family - that I have to wean dd or she will be taking nutrition away from the baby.

I do think I am going to try nightweaning though....I remember being so tired with my dd in the first trimester, getting a good night sleep would really help me! 

[woodchick]

No one ever said a word to me about nursing while pregnant.  I suspect that many people wouldn't have guessed that I was still nursing (like my aunts that I don't see very often, but who have strong opinions!) and that those who Did know that I was were close enough to me to get my "I'm confident about my choices" vibe.

DD1 started sleeping the whole night a little somewhere between 2 and 2.5 and it was a combination of nightweaning efforts on our part and her just being ready.  Not nursing at night made a big difference for me!

[mom2threenurslings]

Many people were concerned that nursing during pregnancy would harm the unborn baby. I did my research, so knew otherwise. My response would usually be something to the effect of, "Thanks so much for your concern for our baby! My research shows that nursing through pregnancy is healthy for all involved. If you have information that says otherwise, I'd be happy to take it into consideration!" or "I was concerned about that in the beginning as well, but was relieved to find out that my body will take care of the fetus first, and as long as I keep myself healthy, it's not an issue at all."

One of the big things for one of my family members was the concept that your uterus contracts when your nipples are stimulated - it contracts when you breastfeed. I said, "yes, I know. Isn't it great that nursing through pregnancy is helping to tone my uterus for an easier birth?!" Then she mentioned the pre-term labor "risk" - to which I responded, "My OB gave me the all-clear to have sex, so I assume that I'm allowed to orgasm - and contractions of the uterus due to orgasm are MUCH stronger than those from nursing, so I think I'm all set, thanks." She had no response to that. ;) 

At one point I went to an OB for my initial appointment before switching to midwives and the OB told me point blank that it was harmful to the fetus to nurse during pregnancy (he didn't know I was TANDEM nursing during pregnancy- I think he might have passed out! :lol: ). My response to him was, "That's interesting, all of the research I've done says that pregnant breastfeeding doesn't harm the fetus or the nursling and that as long as I keep myself healthy, we'll all be just fine." His response was to go on and on about preterm labor, risk of low birthweight, etc. and I politely asked him for his references, and as he was fumbling for an answer to that (he didn't have an answer, actually!), I wrote down a list of my references for him to check out. I also nicely informed him that I'd nursed through my previous pregnancy and my firstborn was 7lbs 2oz at 10 days past my edd, and my secondborn was 9.5lbs. at 9 days past my edd and much healthier than my firstborn was at birth and throughout his first years of life, so I didn't think there was a problem. He said I was done and left the room without another word. ;) I'd love to go back and tell him that I tandem nursed through 3 pregnancies and went on to birth a 10lbs 14oz baby the day after his edd at home after tandem nursing through pregnancy. 

[bluedaisy]

mom2threenurslings - thanks for the great information, that makes me feel better!  We just moved to a new area and are staying with my parents until we find a place, so I can't really hide the fact that I'm still nursing from my parents, who I think will be most concerned.  We haven't told them about the pg yet. we're waiting until we figure a few more things out.

Do you still have any of the references?  It would be good to be prepared because I'm sure that will be one of the first things my mom brings up when I tell her im pg.

[sosurreal09]

WOW you just blew DH and I away. He says "Mad props"
 

Originally Posted by mom2threenurslings 

I have nursed 1 through one pregnancy, tandem nursed through 2 pregnancies and started one pregnancy triandem nursing and ended it tandem nursing and going on to triandem nurse. I was lucky in that my milk supply remained good throughout pregnancy. I made sure I ate enough protein and stayed well hydrated. 

I LOVED nursing through pregnancy and tandem/triandem nursing. There were the occasional times of feeling "touched out" but I figure that would happen anyway, with how cuddly all my toddlers have been  ;) . 

[Comtessa]

I'm currently tandem nursing my 6-wk-old and my 2 yo. 

I think most women find that nursing through pregnancy is the hard part, and tandem nursing the good/easy part.  For me (so far, anyway), it has been the opposite.  Nursing while pg was not too hard on me.  Some nipple pain in the first trimester, but that went away fairly quickly and never bothered me too much. 

Be prepared for an increase in nursing when your milk first starts to dry up.  When this happened (around 15 weeks or so), DD was nursing for literally an hour or more at bedtime.  It was really painful for me and not at all good for our nursing relationship.  DH and I found that introducing a bottle of cow's milk at bedtime helped to smooth this transition -- she got the milk she needed and some of the soothing she needed from sucking, then she'd comfort-nurse for a few minutes before falling asleep. 

We also nightweaned around this time, which helped improve my sleep slightly, but not entirely.  I would HIGHLY recommend that while you are nightweaning (if you plan to do so), you should also transition to your DH being your toddler's primary nighttime caregiver.  I wish with all my heart that we had done that before the baby arrived.  By the time I was in my 3rd trimester, I was exhausted and resentful of everyone in my family, every night, because I could. not. sleep.  DD still wakes 1-2x a night and will go into hysterics if DH tries to calm her.  It was really terrible for a few months; I was not a pleasant person to be around.  I would have done this differently. 

Nursing in labor was actually super helpful when my labor stalled.  The L&D nurses were delighted that we brought DD along for our birth.

Once the baby arrived, things actually got much harder, IME.  DD (who had been nursing 3-4 times a day and never at night) suddenly started begging to nurse obsessively.  All night, all day.  Every time my NB nurses, she melts down: "NO baby mama milk!  MY mama milk!"  It has been a major point of conflict since DS was born.  At the same time, I'm glad she's still nursing, b/c she's still such a baby and needs that closeness and reassurance from me.  Hard as it's been, I don't regret making the choice to tandem nurse.  We're still trying to navigate these waters -- setting limits on the toddler's nursing, finding ways to distract her, trying to RE-nightwean her, etc.  And the good thing is, with all these nurslings, I have a crazy huge milk supply -- much more than I did when DD was a NB.