Getting 9 month old down initially at nighttime

[twolovies07]

Hello!  I have a 9 month old, who I completely believe is going through the 9 month sleep regression, but our bigger issue is her initial going to sleep.  She is just excited and happy and even though her eyes are glassed over and she is not really wanting to be on the floor playing, she wont settle down - she doesnt want to stay breastfeeding or rocking, she wants to stand on my lap and bounce around.  Then if we stay in her room she starts to cry, which stinks because on the one hand, when she cries for a minute or so, it seems to expend that last bit of energy and she relaxes, latches on again and goes to sleep, but I feel really bad that I have no good way to put her down, besides holding her while she cries (and she is screaming, not just whimpering).  I dont mind nursing to sleep, did it with my first and she just grew out of it around 20 months, but she always went down so easily. Bath is a exciting, fun time for my little one, so not good for before bed and she wants to explore all the books with her hands and mouth and gets mad if she cant have them when I read, so thats not a relaxing routine.  Some nights I bring her back out to play again when she doesnt settle before she starts crying and she will stay up until 930/10pm then go to sleep pretty easily but Im really not a fan of such a late bed time...but a crying to sleep bedtime at 730 / 8 is terrible too.  I guess I fear creating unhealthy sleep patterns, which part of me thinks is crazy to worry about and the other part is afraid of :)  Im doing ok with the 2 hours stretches of sleep in the night (because she is back to sleep in minutes) but the initial go down is really tough.  Any thoughts or been there or am there would be so appreciated.  Thanks so very much!!!
 

[nstewart]

Oh gosh, your DD sounds like my DS.  He would crawl all over, try to stand, he just couldn't settle at all!

I think that one thing that helped for us was to establish a real bedtime routine.  The same every night.  We start half an hour before bedtime or so, dim the lights, try to keep things quiet.  The other thing that helped was for me to nurse him standing and rocking (previously I'd been nursing him laying down on our bed, as we cosleep).  I also started putting him in his crib for the first part of the night and then moving him when he woke up after we went to bed.  This way if he fussed while nursing, I could put him down in the crib and he couldn't crawl away.  It sounds like your DD might already be in a crib though...If he sat or stood back up, initially I pick him up and nurse or rock again.  Then when he didn't seem to want that anymore I just keep laying him back down every time he sat or stood up and patted his back.  Sometimes it still takes up to 45 minutes to settle, but he gets to sleep eventually... 

[osker]

OMG, that's completely my DD.. She's decided that she can't sleep when it's light out. Ugh! We thought perhaps an earlier bedtime would help, or a later one, or going out after dinner for a walk and then trying bedtime... We haven't solved the problem yet. She'll bounce around and laugh and is having a blast.. then she's freaked out and exhausted, then she's bouncing and laughing again.  But then darkness comes (around 8:30) and she's done, out in two minutes. 

We're thinking of getting some big heavy dark drapes.. but I'm not sure it would really work.

Sorry for the lack of help, but you're not alone!

ETA: she does nurse down, has since about 7 months. She loves it so much that we're in no rush to stop... and it used to work amazingly well...

[asraidevin]

Music settles my son down who is a sleep fighter. A motion light type thing or colour chsnging light for her to focus on. White noise,

A bit of a massage in a darkened room.

[newmamalizzy]

Have you tried an earlier bedtime?  I know it seems counter-intuitive, but you mentioned that her eyes look glassy and stuff at bedtime, so perhaps she's already too tired.  I'd also suggest a kind of long, predictable evening wind-down period before your bedtime routine - maybe take a walk, go inside and close up the curtains all around the house, put on dim lights and nice music, clean some stuff up, and focus on familiar activities rather than special ones.  DD is similar to yours in that most things that people consider baby-soothers are exciting to her, like books.  Having a long time to play with me (no toys, no books, just me and her) before bed helps her to settle, and I also do a lot of singing to her.  Ants Go Marching, This Old Man, Bingo, Old MacDonald, Mama Don't Allow, etc.  Repetitive, rhythmic songs do the trick in our house.