Chat thread- 5/29-6/4 - Page 3

[not_telling]

Steph - So relieved for you.  Isn't it nice when "the world" acts better than you think it will?

AKislandgirl - Hang in there, mama!  That will be me at the end of August/beginning of Sept.  DH will be in Hawaii for 2 weeks.  I thought we were in the clear in terms of him having to travel during this pregnancy cuz they were looking for people to go to HI or Japan in the fall and he already told them no.  Then he tells me last week that he'll be gone for 2 weeks during the third trimester.  I was like, "what if I need my shoes tied?" -- I was trying to remember the things that were hard to do during the third trimester. 

AFM: The heatwave here has finally broken - huge relief!  Today DS decided he wanted to try wearing underpants and having a potty available on the first and second floor (we've been telling him this is something we were gonna do soon, but he decided on his own to do it today)...and no accidents!  Our 20 week Ultrasound is scheduled for next Friday...hoping the babe cooperates...although I guess even if they said it was a girl (which they won't) there's always the possibility that they got it wrong.

[Katico]

not_telling, we share a due date!  

[StephandOwen]

Originally Posted by not_telling 
Then he tells me last week that he'll be gone for 2 weeks during the third trimester.  I was like, "what if I need my shoes tied?" -- I was trying to remember the things that were hard to do during the third trimester.

DH was gone earlier this pregnancy and we thought we were in the clear until next year. Then DH took a new job last week (same company, just a different position) and they told him they're almost positive he'll have to travel to China or somewhere near there for about 3 weeks in August I'm not too thrilled, but there's nothing I can do about it. He'll be traveling probably twice a year with this new job, for 3-4 weeks each time. It could be worse, but when he was interviewing for this job we were under the impression that travel would be minimal (as in- *maybe* once a year but likely no travel at all). Gotta love the bombs they drop right after you accept the position.

[StephandOwen]

On a totally unrelated note- I've been making muffins all day today! They are part of ds's teachers/paras gift bags for the end of the school year. So far I've made banana, blueberry, peach, chocolate chocolate chip and morning glory. Next up are apple strudel, zucchini and one more that I haven't decided yet (I need 8 types total).

[mingus]

Originally Posted by not_telling hoping the babe cooperates...although I guess even if they said it was a girl (which they won't) there's always the possibility that they got it wrong.

Yup. Saw a dear friend today who was expecting a little girl but instead now has a fresh new baby boy. And this was with 2 u/s. Makes me rethink the girlish clothes I've been buying, but they usually get it right - so my irrational mind is assuming that because they got it wrong with my friend, it is less likely to happen to me and I can still count on my little one being a girl.

Re care for older children during labor and hospital stay: we'll be driving an hour to the birth center, and it is closer than home to all of DS's grandparents. So, we're thinking we'll have grandparents (probably my dad) meet us at the birth center to be with DS and maybe bring him back to our house depending on how fast things are moving. DS is 6, and I think he'd do ok with being around for some of labor, but we'll have a back up plan for him to go with friends closer to home if things are moving too fast or if it is the middle of the night or something. It's not all worked out yet, but luckily there's still time.

[saoirse2007]

Originally Posted by Katico 

Yes Ma'am!  What province are you in now?

Ontario...I saw the IWK on your u/s pic :)
 

[lifeguard]

mingus - I had the same type of reasoning whenever friends had babies. I figured if they had boys my chances of a girl were better. Used to drive a friend of mine batty!

afm - I went maternity clothing shopping today. Is there any less depressing place than a shopping mall? There are so few places that even sell maternity clothing here (that would be a total of 2 in the entire mall). Old Navy had very little & all the dresses (my preference) were spaghetti strap which is so completely useless imo (I NEED a bra ladies!). In Thyme Maternity I ended up getting a jean skirt in XXL - so disappointing as the skirt I have from my last pregnancy from there is a L & it fits perfectly. What the heck? Why can't they size women's clothing like men's - by actual measurements?

In the end I did find 2 dresses at a plus sized store - one casual & one for a wedding we'll be going to next month (which I wasn't even looking for!). The uplifting part was, besides getting both on sale, that they are both sized 16 - a size I haven't worn in many years. Looks like a lot of my size really is all tummy. Luckily there are a few styles that are common in plus sizes that always make me look pregnant normally so avoid them so they work great as maternity.

Why oh why am I so huge though? All my old maternity stuff (that I wore until 39 weeks) just barely fits right now & I am 35lbs lighter. Ugh!

[RosemaryS-F]

I hear you about the clothing size weirdness. I got underwear recently at Motherhood in the size that I got last time and was very large. So I figured it would fit the same this time, but it is smaller than all my size small regular underwear from old navy. So I can wear it now, but not for long and it was not all that cheap, either. Of course, no returns!

[Dreamy]

Poodge - Sweet baby pic :) Sending lots of placenta climbing vibes!

lifeguard - Funny, I was having a burning sensation in that area as well. I was starting to suspect possible bladder infection so I went to my doctor, but there were no traces of bacteria. Cervix looks good and baby's heart rate is strong, so I'm baffled. It's gone today at least (it lasted about three days).

Katico - excellent preparation ideas. I think I'll need to make lists of my son's favourite things to do and eat to make things easier while I'm away. Congrats on your girl! I would love a girl, but am comfortable in boy territory right now... we'll see!

lifeguard - The only maternity stuff I have really bought this time around are Duo Maternity and Old Navy tops off of eBay. I'm actually living in the regular Old Navy jersey foldover skirts - they are perfect! I also bought a bunch of Old Navy stretch tank tops and some cardigans to cover my bra straps. I'm set, and saved money! We have Motherhood and Thyme here, but they sell capris for $60 and shirts for $45 - give me a break. The only splurge I made was a tie-die maxi skirt from Motherhood, I couldn't resist

Eeep - I just felt definite baby movement! Yay!

[not_telling]

Originally Posted by Katico 

not_telling, we share a due date!  

Ahh...I should update that.  Can't remember which thread I mentioned this on, but at my prenatal last Friday the midwife and I had a "debate" about when I ovulated, based on my temp. chart that cycle.  She said she thought it was 3 days earlier than I thought it was and then she asked another midwife in the practice what she thought and she agreed with the first midwife.  I understood their rationale...they saw a dip followed by a verrry slow rise...I was just going with the day before my temp went above the coverline and by my cervical mucus.  It was kinda humorous cuz I was like, "Really?  You care so much about determining as estimated due date...when eveyone's always saying how the majority of babies don't arrive on their due date?"  (two friends of mine who used the same midwifery practice have had issues with this same midwife and were not surprised to hear that we ended up in a debate.)  But, obviously I cared enough to engage in a debate .  With DS, I calculated my due date and the midwives came up with a EDD one day later than mine.  My contractions and DS both arrived on the day I calculated.  So, maybe I feel a little over-confident.  Anyway, I agreed to changing my EDD to Oct. 21 instead of 23.

[RosemaryS-F]

That is really so funny, not_telling. Maybe the baby will come on the 22nd.

Just finished the catering job! It looked great and the woman was thrilled and is going to refer me. We'll see how that goes, but it felt good to do a good job and make money and be creative. I am going to buy my dh some beer! (We recently gave up our "beer budget" to donate to a non-profit. It was dh's idea--and I totally didn't care because I'm not drinking--but he misses his beverage of choice.)

[saoirse2007]

baby is starting to make his (just guessing) presence known...finally at 19w3d

I am eating a lamb burger with greek yogurt on it yummy!!!!

I got a full time job!!!! I will be working full time until my contract is done at the end of August!!! First baby that I will get mat leave for...whoo hoo!!!

my 4 year old has started kissing my belly all the time...God I love that boy!!

[lifeguard]

not_telling - it's funny how obsessed with edd people become. I am 100% certain of the day I conceived (there was really only one choice) yet my doctor still insisted I have a u/s to date.

saoirse - my ds loves to give my belly loving but it must be skin to skin. Very cute but a little awkward when he decides to 'see' the baby when we're in public.

[AKislandgirl]

My Dr is tied to her wheel too! She says my due date is the 7th but I know that it is the 10th. The u/s even confirmed my date. Whatever. it's just a few days...

Today was my last day of doing child care. I've done child care in my home since DD was 6 months old. The first year I had 3 kids here and this last year just one. Now it will be just my kiddos! We love the little girl I've been watching for two years but I'm really thrilled to just have my own family and to focus on them. I'm also happy to not have to get up with an alarm! :)

[~pi]

Originally Posted by RosemaryS-F 

Just finished the catering job! It looked great and the woman was thrilled and is going to refer me. We'll see how that goes, but it felt good to do a good job and make money and be creative. I am going to buy my dh some beer! (We recently gave up our "beer budget" to donate to a non-profit. It was dh's idea--and I totally didn't care because I'm not drinking--but he misses his beverage of choice.)

Hooray! And what a great idea on your DH's part.

Originally Posted by saoirse2007 

I got a full time job!!!! I will be working full time until my contract is done at the end of August!!! First baby that I will get mat leave for...whoo hoo!!!

So exciting!! Congrats!! That's so great you can actually use EI.

(I paid into it for years, then went back to grad school, got pregnant with DS, and couldn't use it. I won't get any funded mat leave this time, either. I need to time these things better!)
 

Originally Posted by AKislandgirl 

Today was my last day of doing child care. I've done child care in my home since DD was 6 months old. The first year I had 3 kids here and this last year just one. Now it will be just my kiddos! We love the little girl I've been watching for two years but I'm really thrilled to just have my own family and to focus on them. I'm also happy to not have to get up with an alarm! :)

Congratulations!! What a bittersweet moment, I'm sure.
 

Originally Posted by Dreamy 

Eeep - I just felt definite baby movement! Yay!

Me too. All the [expletive] time, actually. I feel badly complaining about this, as I know it's so worrisome when you don't feel anything, but good grief this kid is active. I didn't feel him as early as DS, so I thought maybe I was getting a mellow one this time, and now I am seriously worried that he might be even more demanding than DS was! Plus the movement makes me feel pretty nauseated at times.
 

Originally Posted by lifeguard 

all the dresses (my preference) were spaghetti strap which is so completely useless imo (I NEED a bra ladies!).

I am so with you! Shelf bras do not cut it!

Originally Posted by StephandOwen 

On a totally unrelated note- I've been making muffins all day today! They are part of ds's teachers/paras gift bags for the end of the school year. So far I've made banana, blueberry, peach, chocolate chocolate chip and morning glory. Next up are apple strudel, zucchini and one more that I haven't decided yet (I need 8 types total).

Drooling here. Also in awe of your productivity.

Poodge, hugs. Sending lots of, 'move, placenta, move!' vibes.

Re: older kids and bellies, I was heading out to a board meeting a couple of evenings ago, and DS gave me a hug goodbye, and then said he wanted to give the baby a hug, too. So he hugged my belly while I melted into a puddle of goo.

[StephandOwen]

I think I must have the only OB who really doesn't care about EDD. He's thrown around a couple different EDD (based on LMP and different ultrasounds), all within a couple days of each other. At my last appointment he said something like "and this EDD based on the ultrasound is 10/10, we had figured 10/12 earlier..... and baby will come whenever he wants so it doesn't matter anyway". My jaw dropped to the ground just hearing him say that!

Re: Baby movement- I've been hesitant to say anything because I know there are other mamas who aren't feeling anything yet, but good gracious this baby is so active! He's way more active than ds ever was (and I thought he was active at the time ). I don't think little Sunburst ever sleeps, which is a little worrisome. LOL! Sunburst has also found my bladder, and thinks it makes a great soccer ball (or punching bag). I've peed my pants more times than I care to admit   It is cool though that pretty much anytime dh wants to feel the baby, all I have to do is lay down and let him put a hand on it and it's likely to be dancing a jig in there. My fundus is almost at my ribs right now and I'm a little scared that in a week or two I'm going to be getting kicks in the ribs. I did not enjoy that part last time and to know it's going to be happening even earlier this time is a little concerning (no idea why my fundus is so high, but the dr said everything was fine).

Re: older kids and bellies... dh and ds think the most hilarious thing is my belly button. It is not, officially, an outie. And they love playing with it. DS will walk up to me randomly, poke my belly button, and run away laughing He's a nut. DS is a vegetarian (by his choice- he hasn't eaten meat since he was 1). He told us the other day that he's going to teach the baby to eat just like him- no meat. DH (a big meat eater) was like NOOOO!!!! LOL! DH said he'll be rubbing steak on the baby's gums when it's a month old, just to get the taste in it's mouth

Re: maternity leave- I am so happy that this time I can pretty much have as much time as I want! With ds I went into the hospital on Wednesday after work, delivered Friday afternoon, came home from the hospital Saturday evening and went back to work on Monday (half days for the first week then full days after that). Although I could take ds with me, it still sucked and was not a good thing for recovery. This time I work as a substitute para for the school district so I can pick and choose my own hours, which means I don't have to work if I don't want to. I think the plan right now is to not work at all until after the new year. Then I might pick up a day here and there while dh works from home and watches the baby. But if I don't feel like doing that, or if dh can't work from home for whatever reason, I won't work at all. DH's leave after the baby is frustrating me right now. When we first started talking about having a baby I made it very clear that I did not want to do it alone. BTDT (was a single mom with ds) and don't want to do it again. DH said he would be able to get at least a week off work. Then when we got pregnant and he talked to his manager he was assured he could take at least 2 weeks, more if the project crap they were doing allowed. Yay! Then last week dh took a new job (same company, different position with a different manager). Now he doesn't know if he'll get any time off   He said that if it comes down to it he can take like 3 days of personal days off, but that's all he's guaranteed. I am pissed off that, yet again, I might be doing it alone in the early days. Except this time I have an older child on top of it all that I have to take to school, pick up, entertain, take to therapy, etc. And somehow I'm still supposed to rest and recover. Right   I'm sure it will all work out in the end, but for now I'm just frustrated.

[saoirse2007]

Canadian mat leave is soo great...I wish that it was the same in the US :(

I will get a year off...with dd I went back to work part time when she was 3 weeks. DD was born Sunday and Dh had an exam the next morning, but he did end up taking parental leave a month or so later for 9 whole months......JOY JOY JOY

This time he will not be able to take any time off or parental leave...I hope this baby comes on a weekend again.

[AKislandgirl]

DH is a federal employee so he gets decent leave. He probably won't take all of it though. With DD he took 2 weeks off and then went back half days for 2 weeks. I'm hoping this time he'll take 3 weeks off and then half days for 2-3 weeks. We'll see. I just know that DD will need a lot of attention from him.  My mom will be here for a bit too which will be great.  I'm sorry for those of you who won't have help during the days from your partners. I hope you have friends and family that can pitch in!  Last year he took the week of Christmas off to which was really fun. I'm hoping he may be able to do that again as well.

[RosemaryS-F]

DH doesn't get paid leave. He can take an unpaid week or get someone to cover all of his classes. He has so far been able to get volunteers to cover for him, but we'll know better in the fall. He was still in grad school and doing construction when DS was born so there was no leave (though he took 2 days and was not paid.) So this is better than that was.

[emmaegbert]

popping in here (usually I don't manage it) to say, yeah, maternity clothes shopping, blah. Just bought some stuff at Target today. I have some hand-me-downs, and expect a few more from a friend who is out of town... anyway money is so tight/nonexistent but I really suddenly popped out and have nothing to wear. A couple of winter clothes. I hate having sticky thighs and need to find some kind of bike shorts deals that I can wear under skirts and dresses...

Leave: neither of us has ever really gotten maternity/paternity leave. With #1 we were both in school, and I went back when DS was 1 week old. We juggled his care at first. Then, with DD, I basically took off school for the first 5 months, and DH took off one day of work (unpaid). This time, I am just taking my own "leave" (i/e taking a break from working on my dissertation... I don't get paid next year anyway) and DH just is starting a new job right now, so who knows. I think he'll be on a real permanent contract by next fall (he's hired for 2 months for now, but they are opening a new fabrication shop and he's pretty sure they are planning to bring him in to that as a full-time fabricator... he's making retail windows and interior displays for a company that really goes all out with that). anyway I guess its possible he'll have a little leave... like sick days or something?

Birth plan: we live downstairs from my parents and are planning a homebirth. our kids (6yo and 2yo) already run upstairs when they want to and treat it like their second home. I plan to have my parents available to them so the kids can choose what is comfortable for them- being with me for the birth or not. Also my sister will be living up there by then. I may have a friend or two on call for "backup" in the event that I give birth over columbus day weekend, when I think my parents will be away (though with my mom retired now, I guess they can go whenever). we'll still have the upstairs house for "overflow" even if it ends up being friends who help out.

The 2yo has a couple of times seemed to notice my belly and say, "baby growing in there", though today she said its not a baby girl or a baby boy, its a baby cat. (I hope not!)