Like many of you I have a very spirited 3yo DD. I have read Raising Your Spirited Child and DD is off the charts for every category of spiritedness! For the most part we have made it through by trial and error and I assure you there have been more errors than solutions.
There is one particular behavior right now that I just can't manage to find a solution to. Whenever we need to speak to DD about instructions for something, speak to her about an unappropriate action or just ask her a question we get down on her level and ask her to come so we can talk. She will listen to the first few words and if she doesn't like what we're saying she will start yelling and screaming over DH and I so she doesn't hear us. There have been times that I needed her do something immediately and I have tried being louder than her and that definitely doesn't work. Trying it again later, isn't always an option and it doesn't work a second time either. We have asked her to stop yelling, to calm down, to take a deep breathe, to speak nicely and use her words to no avail. If she doesn't want to hear something she makes sure she doesn't hear it!
I could really use some ideas Mamas!