Am I too sensitive for this?

[Camomille]

Is it normal to feel attached to a child after only a few weeks? How do you handle and get over the sudden separations?

Edited by Camomille - 6/1/11 at 3:04pm

[WifeMomChiro]

I think people can feel attachment at all different times.  I don't know your situation or how you can get over a loss, but there are a lot of resources out there to help.

[Polliwog]

I felt a level of "attachment" to my son from the day I met him (about six months before he went into foster care.) And it continued when he was placed with me (about a year after I met him.) But, I don't compare that "attachment" to the attachment I have as his mother of several years.

[krisnic]

I felt a strong attachment to my son after just a few weeks. It has only continued to grow. And separation is hard, for both of us. And he's 15, and our first child.

[Camomille]

Thank you for all your replies. We had only had him for a couple of weeks when things surfaced that meant we couldn't continue, for the sake of our bio DS' safety. He was moved to an orphanage.

We were originally meant to keep him short term for now, and then every now and again as respite. Now we can't even continue doing respite for him. I am devastated. He was so happy when we came to see him in the orphanage, and it was only to say goodbye. :(

I would appreciate to hear some opinions from more experienced foster parents - do you stay in touch in such cases? In what way? I'm in doubt about what is best for the child.

Part of me wants to just move on, and call and say we are open for a new assignment.

Edited by Camomille - 6/4/11 at 3:55am

[Camomille]

Originally Posted by WifeMomChiro 

I don't know your situation or how you can get over a loss, but there are a lot of resources out there to help.

Thank you! I'm not in the US and I don't know whether we have the same resources here. What kind of resources do you have access to in the US?

I am debating with myself whether to tell the CPS worker how devastated I am. I am a bit worried that they will think that I am over-sensitive and that they will be hesitant to give us another assignment because of that.

[marsupial-mom]

I don't get attached that quickly, but after nearly two years as a foster parent I think I'm done. The separations/moves are hard for us and harder for the children but the worst part is how much these kids move around for no good reason. It sometimes feels like the agency has no interest in permanency. That, I'm too "sensitive" for.