Hi there. I'm not sure this is the right forum, but I need some advice.
I live in a 3-apartment flat & we got some new neighbors 2-3 months ago. They have been annoying me greatly & I find that my anger prevents me from dealing with them in a sensible manner.
The boyfriend (girlfriend seems ok, raised two kids as a single mom & works often so is not always around when I am home with DS & is not a big part of the problem) plays music & TV loudly... during the afternoon (during DS's naptime) & at night (often on weeknights when DH & I are trying to sleep... DH has to wake up early for work & DS is an early bird as well).
We have complained to them (well, to boyfriend) about the noise about 6 times now. We have been living here for 2 years... no problems with 2 sets of prior tenants. He seems to not understand the concept of toddler naps or wanting to just work/be quietly. I have sometimes during the day tried to play my own music... it does not counter the loudness of his. The first couple of times DH or I were very calm & very apologetic. I was cross once, but that was at 11:30 on a monday night... I don't know who wouldn't be upset, so I try to forgive myself for being less than friendly.
I emailed my landlord to let her know what was going on, but not asking her to intervene (hopefully, I'll hear back soon). I honestly don't know what to do or how to deal with the neighbors or my anger. Today (during DS's nap) I tried to go to the neighbors & calmly request (yet again) that they keep it down. I feel like things didn't go well (I was probably seeming impatient though DH says I was calm & neighbor slammed his door). And later in the afternoon they were playing music loudly again (though not as loud as before). It really upset me. I just wanted to run from the house.
Honestly, I think he may not realize just how loud it is in our apartment. He seems to think that I'm telling him to not listen to music, but really it's just the volume at which he plays it (I feel it's his problem if he can't enjoy music except for above a certain level). But I feel such anger & resentment, my instinct is to just leave the house rather than confront him. And I know that I can no longer deal with them on neighborly terms. I am so angry.
I realize that my anger is an issue (though I also don't think I'm out of line in my request considering we rented this apartment understanding that it was a quiet building & there is a lease term requiring us to be considerate of the other tenants, particularly in terms of noise). I can never quite say the right thing when I go to talk to them & we don't run into each other often otherwise.
Luckily we only have 2 more months left in this apartment, but I find myself scheming all types of evil ways to get them evicted. In short I don't know how to deal with (a) the neighbors and (b) my own anger. Any suggestions?
Oh, DH is willing to go talk to them sometimes, but I am far more sensitive to sound (especially when trying to fall asleep) than him so I feel I should be the one dealing with the issue (not that DH hasn't stepped in). Also, in my pre-kid days, I would have solved this by putting in earplugs, but with a toddler who is not always in my bed this is impractical for a number of reasons.
Thanks for reading & for any advice.