Anybody unschooling an Aspie?

[Piglet68]

So I've recently had a huge light bulb moment and discovered that both my kids have Asperger's Syndrome. They have an appointment for a referral, but having read a couple of books they fit my kids to a tee. 

I'd love to discuss unschooling with anybody who has an Asperger's kid (or 2, or 3!). So far having read up on AS I am so very very grateful that my kids were never in school! What a nightmare! But I'm also looking ahead to the future, and would love to know what therapies or programs your kids are doing. 

[scoobymummy]

Hi piglet. I'm not hsing an aspie, but my ds is somewhere on the spectrum - a right brain thinker for sure. Here's a couple of links for you.

http://applestars.homeschooljournal.net/2010/03/12/timeframes-challenges-and-disabilities/

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/homeschoolingcreatively/

http://throwingmarshmallows.homeschooljournal.net/2006/12/23/250/

Hope that helps!

Marian

[Piglet68]

Thanks so much for the links!!

[riversmommy]

Hi. I'm pretty sure I'm hs/us-ing an Aspie. I first had my "light bulb moment" when he was about 3 years old. He's now 7 and we just "finished" first grade last month. We're with a parent choice charter so I guess I'm nominally unschooling by their standards, and doing whatever works best by my standards.

He went to a few months of K. It was half-way through the year and I was at a point in my life where I really just couldn't handle his obsessions and need for structure. That turned out to be a wonderful choice and the ps school(and teacher) were awesome! Then, we moved and for 1st grade he got put into a classroom of 33 kids, one teacher, and lots of standing in line! Not good! A phobic issue where he wouldn't go to the bathroom all day because he'd have to walk past a certain child's classroom door..etc. Homework battles every night. Lots of meltdowns when he got home from school. Soooo, after about 6 weeks I took him out and the rest of the year has been good.

That said, some weeks I find it enormously difficult to handle his needs. And some weeks it is the most amazing thing to see how beautifully he's growing. I find some "structure" is good or else he will play video games for 8 hours straight. Some Aspie's (at least mine does) have difficulty with self-regulation and obsessions. So, I have to help him learn to listen to his body and brain. I regulate things to certain extent, but I was raised as a homeschooler so I don't know how "regulated" I really am! lol He can read above grade level but handwriting is horrendous. He is amazing at math, can use an abacus, but he can't tie shoes or button yet. Augh! Welcome to my world-lol! :)

My advice for myself is: don't limit yourself to certain curriculum/label/hs-ing style/discipline style...just keep things fluid and keeping loving and talking and explaining and also, if you can find a few people who support you, keep 'em around! :) including but not limited to MDC, everyone's so great here! 

[Greenmama2]

I don't *think* so but I do know my very bright, sometimes rigid, sometimes anxious, sensorily overwhelmed by more than one or two other children around would look like a very different child if she were in school.
Following this thread with interest.

[Multimomma]

Originally Posted by riversmommy 

Hi. I'm pretty sure I'm hs/us-ing an Aspie. I first had my "light bulb moment" when he was about 3 years old. He's now 7 and we just "finished" first grade last month. We're with a parent choice charter so I guess I'm nominally unschooling by their standards, and doing whatever works best by my standards.

He went to a few months of K. It was half-way through the year and I was at a point in my life where I really just couldn't handle his obsessions and need for structure. That turned out to be a wonderful choice and the ps school(and teacher) were awesome! Then, we moved and for 1st grade he got put into a classroom of 33 kids, one teacher, and lots of standing in line! Not good! A phobic issue where he wouldn't go to the bathroom all day because he'd have to walk past a certain child's classroom door..etc. Homework battles every night. Lots of meltdowns when he got home from school. Soooo, after about 6 weeks I took him out and the rest of the year has been good.

That said, some weeks I find it enormously difficult to handle his needs. And some weeks it is the most amazing thing to see how beautifully he's growing. I find some "structure" is good or else he will play video games for 8 hours straight. Some Aspie's (at least mine does) have difficulty with self-regulation and obsessions. So, I have to help him learn to listen to his body and brain. I regulate things to certain extent, but I was raised as a homeschooler so I don't know how "regulated" I really am! lol He can read above grade level but handwriting is horrendous. He is amazing at math, can use an abacus, but he can't tie shoes or button yet. Augh! Welcome to my world-lol! :)

My advice for myself is: don't limit yourself to certain curriculum/label/hs-ing style/discipline style...just keep things fluid and keeping loving and talking and explaining and also, if you can find a few people who support you, keep 'em around! :) including but not limited to MDC, everyone's so great here! 

Great advice!

I'm unschooling at least two boys with aspergers, maybe a girl. how things work really depend on how well they are functioning, sometimes I do need to step back, and sometimes I need to step forward and help work through issues. Especially how they relate to others...whew! 

But while sometimes the public school would have been helpful, especially with routine and expectations, in many other ways it has been so much better to be out of school. Social modeling is much more controlled, expectations can be relaxed, and they are allowed to bloom at their own rates. They're doing wonderfully, actually. My 16 yo decided he wanted coopclasses to help get ready for college admission, and is rocking those. 

[riversmommy]

Multimomma-I'm so glad to hear about older kids with AS doing well. Here's a somewhat related question: Is occupational therapy useful? If I get my son evaluated and diagnosed, he can have an IEP through our charter and they will pay for therapy. However, the more we simply work with him and build his confidence, the more he "blooms at his own pace". I'm not sure how I feel about any of that really...but leaning toward leaving things as they are.

Thoughts on this? And also OP's questions about specific therapies...

[Piglet68]

Hey, riversmommy, seems we're thinking the same thoughts. Since I figured out what is underlying DD's issues we have been having some great conversations. She is really curious and interested in hearing what I have to say about some of the things she may have "gotten wrong" over the years (like that particular person actually likes you and when you thought he was teasing you to be mean it was actually affectionate and maybe you have a hard time telling the difference?), recognizing anxiety in herself, etc. In the short time that I've been applying what I've learned we've already seen some big changes and I'm wondering if she really needs any sort of therapy at all. DS probably will need at least a social skills group so he can actually go out and do stuff without his mama shadowing him! But I am wavering back and forth between thinking we should just tackle this on our own and let them "bloom at their own pace", and then thinking that I need help with this and good therapy that is fun for the kids and that they see value in would be a good thing. We've only just started the process of seeking a diagnosis so I'm not at that point yet, but thinking about it alot!