Waiting 3+ mos to ttc - (wanna start another group thread?)

[osker]

Anybody out there thinking of ttc sometime soon, but not just yet?  We've just started OPKs and BBTs looking at a January ttc date for Esther's younger sister or brother!  I'll be carrying this time, we hope, and H keeps telling me that she wants twin boys! Yikes!   

I don't think I'm quite ready for the tww crowd over on queer conceptions, but I'm ready to be something a bit more invested!

[aquapacata]

We are in a funny waiting period too - probably want to have #2, but have not decided how, yet. We're sort of in limbo - maybe more so than you are!  

Edited by aquapacata - 6/10/11 at 8:15pm

[Forthwith]

We're in a similar position.  We're waiting until spring to TTC baby #2.  There is only one vial of DS's donor available to us, so we want to wait until:

1. DS is weaned (I'm going to start working on that in August, and plan to be done by December)

2. We've saved up enough money to try a round of IVF (provided our insurance will cover at least some of the meds - if they don't, I'll probably use clomid)

It feels bizarre to be going from DS's conception (unmedicated IUI, worked first time we tried) to something as intense as IVF, but we really do want to use the same donor.

[osker]

Yeah, we're waiting until I get five months into a year-long internship, hoping for first time luck and a baby due just after I complete my doctorate (put it on hold for a year to be home with Esther). It will mean putting off post-doc potentially, but we would have had kids even closer together if things hadn't thrown us for a loop recently. 

I think IVF might be nice... someone else to do all of the worrying about timing, etc.. just show up and get pregnant! :)  I know it's not that easy, but it's nice to think of it that way!

[aquapacata]

Theo is not weaned yet, either, and sometimes nurses a lot - and because of his peanut allergy I want him to nurse as long as possible (it's supposed to mitigate the severity of the allergy).  So that's a factor.  We are still weighing the possibility of adoption, too, and then there's the old biological clock.  Plus I'm not 100% sure we SHOULD have another kid.... we live on an assistant professor's (humanities) salary, and I will need to go back to work eventually, but in a new city with few jobs I'm qualified for, which probably means back to school for nursing or teaching.  It's a lot to consider, timing and money wise!  

[JustAnotherJenny]

I'm still kicking around from the original thread!  :-)  But I'm getting MUCH closer to reality.  My cycle is still a bit wonky -- but I am ovulating most of the time!  My luteal phase is too short, but I think with a bit more time things will line up!

Any good tips for lengthening the luteal phase and how to stop break through spotting?  Is break through spotting even a problem?

Originally I was thinking of maybe trying in August, but we're gearing up to move. So, I definitely won't be ttc until after we're settled in the new house. 

Osker, I didn't realize you were so close to me geographically!

[osker]

Yeah, Esther isn't weaned yet, and won't be for a while, hopefully.. but since we're switching to me carrying that won't hold us back! I did nurse her for a while at the beginning, but I've been back to regular for six months or so, so we're pretty set there.

JAJ - We are somewhat close to you, but we're actually not in Boston right now.   We're in Manhattan for H's work right now, potentially in NJ for my internship next year (we don't know yet if we're moving by Aug. *shudder*).. but we'll be back in Boston by Sept '12, thus the reason for waiting to ttc, hoping for a Sept or later due date!

As to the questions on luteal phase.. this may just be some crazy rambling of a poor memory.. but I could've sworn that H used progesterone cream for a cycle or two and it lengthened her lp just a tad bit... I'll have to look back on our blog for a reminder.  What do you mean by break thru spotting, and just how short is short?

[TillyBarry]

Hi there,

My partner and I are in a similar position, weighing out life, age, breastfeeding, finances, donor options, in deciding when to conceive #2.  We have 12 month old who I am still breastfeeding.  We are planning on me carrying #2 as well.  But I have not gotten my period yet, and don't want to rush weaning.  Because DS and I are both happy breastfeeding.  But would like the children to be close in age.  I am thinking about starting fertility herbs, diet, and acupuncture again soon in preparation.  Anybody have any thoughts on this while breastfeeding.  What about TTC while breastfeeding, is that a waste of time and money when using donor sperm?

[JustAnotherJenny]

Well, my luteal phase was 9 days in April, 7 days in May , and not sure yet this cycle.  I do seem to have some spotting right after ovulation, but it seems to go on a bit longer than normal.  I ovulated for the first time in March around Easter time, but I don't have good data for that cycle.

I bought an Ovacue Monitor so I can actually confirm ovulation (you need both sensors to confirm ovulation). To understand the color coding, you can go here to page 9.  There are very few days during my cycle, at least so far, where I'm not having some kind of spotting.  I suppose it could just be that my body is still trying to get back into the groove of ovulating and cycling normally. 

I went Gluten Free in September because I found I out have Celiac.  Turns out this was the remaining bit that was holding my body back.  Things got crazy for awhile cycle wise, but then I was rewarded with ovulation.  It took a long time for my body to heal from the damage that the gluten was doing.  I am still seeing improvement in my skin and with my allergies; I am hopeful that things will continue to get better.

Still struggling to get on track with diet and exercise though.  My activity level is close to nothing.  I recently became a doula.  I am so busy with that, that all I want to do when I get home from work and doulaing is sit on my duff and do nothing.  I know if I exercise my energy level will increase, but it's difficult to get motivated to get going in the first place. :-)

I have heard that using progesterone cream is a good idea.  I've been thinking about picking some up.

I do have a known donor that I plan to use. He's a wonderful guy -- and he's close enough in my circle of friends where we'll be able to keep in touch if we choose, but not so close where it could become difficult and/or uncomfortable for our friendship.

[osker]

Tilly, I think I would start by taking your temp every morning and peeing on OPKs to see if you can identify any sort of cycle of hormones at all. I suspect that H actually has started to cycle her hormones again, even though she hasn't actually had a post partum period.  She's been showing PMS type signs, tired at certain times, and headaches at certain times of the month, similar to her cycle when she is bleeding. I don't know if her body is just lightly getting back into the monthly cycle or what, but I would start by seeing if you have any soft signs of cycles.

[JustAnotherJenny]

Hey tilly! We are super close!  :-)

[JustAnotherJenny]

Osker, perhaps you'll end up back in Boston in Sept 2012 -- if so we'll all have to plan a meet up!

[TillyBarry]

Jenny, we are close!  Yes, I do have cycle like signs.  Fertile mucus, cramps, etc.  Just no blood yet.  Starting to chart is a good idea, especially if we are thinking of trying again in the fall.  What about TTC while breastfeeding?  Worthwhile?

[Forthwith]

Originally Posted by TillyBarry 

Anybody have any thoughts on this while breastfeeding.  What about TTC while breastfeeding, is that a waste of time and money when using donor sperm?

I second the advice to start charting.  It's possible a doctor might be willing/able to check your hormone levels as well.

Personally, if we had more vials of our donor, I would be willing to TTC without weaning.  But that's mostly because I got my period back six weeks post-partum*, despite my son's constant nursing.    I figure breastfeeding can't be impacting my fertility that much.

*Or earlier.  It's possible some of the post-partum bleeding was actually a period.

[jennp85]

I'm in the waiting to start trying period!  I'm waiting for the info session at Howard Brown, a local LGBTQ health center, on July 16.  I'm getting an opk from a friend soon and charting what I can of my temps and cervical mucus in the meantime.  I don't have very consistent sleep and I wake up frequently, so temping is proving difficult.  I think I felt myself ovulate one night a week ago and the next day my temp was up.  I've currently got an eye infection, so that's one more reason I'm not trusting temps.  I tried with a KD for two cycles but then he got scared and changed his mind.  I'm going with The Sperm Bank of California, hoping to do 2 IUIs a cycle and have my top 5 donors picked out.  Wheh!

[TillyBarry]

JennP,  I never temp much when TTC with my first pregnancy, I worked 3 overnights a week and it was impossible to be consistent.   I am going to try to use that as a sign this next time, but we will see if I can be consistent. 

Kelmendi, thanks for the advice, a hormone check is a good idea. 

[jennp85]

i'm thinking they might try to require me to temp, the program coordinator mentioned charting for 3 months before they let us try.  I'm going to push to be an exception to that "suggestion." I have an alarm set for 8am to check my temp (then I usually go back to sleep, depending on my schedule that day) but if I wake up at 6:30 for no reason then I turn off that alarm.  All the books say that you have to have 3-5 hours of sleep before temping.  I'm just going to go to the info session armed with all the knowledge I already have and hope they jive with my plans.  I don't yet know what they test for before starting and if it includes any hormones or anything.  I don't know if they use clomid, or if it's an option for people who need or want it.  I want more information from them! lol  oh man, the twins I nanny fell right asleep and I feel like I could pass out too.

[cortinacolorado]

Hello, I'm brand new here. DP and I have been together for a long time--9+ years--and are working toward having everything together to start TTC #1 in 2012. It's the practical timeline, I know...but the wait is killing me! For a long time the desire was mental/emotional/conceptual, but holy cow is my body in on it now, too! Community support around the process of planning and patience might be just what I need.

Am I the only one here who doesn't yet have any kids?

[JustAnotherJenny]

You are not alone! I don't have any kids yet, either!  I have been waiting for 2+ years to get my act together to start trying.  I should be starting January 2012 AT THE LATEST!  :-)

[jennp85]

i don't yet either!  but i've been a nanny for a very long time so i have lots of kid experience, especially with twins in the 1-3 range.  i've been ready for a few years now and instead of waiting for the right time, i'm going to make it the right time!