Big sadness over daughter leaving (and empty nest)

[Lisa1970]

I am very happy for her. But I am so sad too. She is going to music camp for 6 weeks. None of my children has ever been away this long. Anyway, any suggestions for me? I was thinking of making her a little photo book to take with her. I think we will visit her mid-summer to see one of her concerts. Anyone else have a child go away like this? I hope it all goes well, college is not far off.

[A&A]

Music camp sounds incredibly fun!  Do some fun things for yourself, too--browse a bookstore, get a massage, whatever. 

[Dar]

It's so hard! This is my third summer away from Rain - we were together last summer (after 9 months apart) but apart the two summers before that. I still miss her a ton, but we're more used to things now so we kind of have a plan. Does your daughter have email? Skype? We pretty much email every day or two, just checking in, as long as we both have access. We skype when we can, too, and I send at least one postcard. I'm assuming your daughter is in the same country, too, so you could even call or text... if the camp allows it, I guess. We did run into problems with a CTY camp as far as parent contact, but I'm not sure how typical that is. I would try to be sure that she does have a way to contact you if she needs to.

I find it helps me to talk about my daughter to people... it makes me feel closer to her. The first few days are always really hard but then it gets easier, IME.

This year Rain is actually a camp counselor, so she's dealing with homesick campers herself...

[Lisa1970]

They do not allow cell phones or computers, but they do allow the child to buy a calling card and call home. So I won't be able to call her, but she will be able to call us. 

[Dar]

Phone calls are good... and you can send letters, yes? Letters and small, fun packages have been hits with Rain - just goofy stuff like Hello Kitty Bandaids, pop-rocks, whatever...

[cat13]

I used to run a summer camp and we had a no-phone calls policy, except for emergencies. But I always welcomed the parents to call me and ask how their DC was doing. Maybe you could do that, just to get some idea of what her day-to-day life is like? 

I think the photo book idea is great!  Another good idea is to go to the store together beforehand and pick out some fun stationary and pens for both of you. Depending on how old she is, you can even self-address and stamp the envelopes for her so it's easier for her to write to you.  And pp is right, small packages are great for kids to receive. You have no idea how something so small can really just make their day/week. 

Lastly, remind yourself what a great parent you have been to this child, if she is able to be away from her home for 6 whole weeks in order to pursue her love for music. She must be a really strong and confident girl!