Yesterday DH found a bunny's nest in the yard. In the evening we showed DS who will be 5yo in less than a month. Of course, we requested that he do not disturb the nest. But it wasn't long before both DH and I were in the house, he snuck out. DH was by the window and heard noise/talking and saw DS holding a rabbit. After, DS told us that he was holding one and slammed it down! I gave him a TV remote and asked me to show how hard, and he really slammed it on the floor! I had no idea if he was exaggerating. But a bit later when I asked him to show he again he did it lighter. I have no idea which is the truth.
Also apparently, he was poking a stick into the nest and made them squeal. We tried to tell if any of the bunnys were hurt but it was hard to tell w/o disturbing the nest/taking them all out. And apparently after some fishing I found out he took two out, not one.
We are very disturbed that he 'slammed' the bunnies and poked them. (He can also be aggressive with other kids). He has a huge listening problem. We are also disturbed that when we talk to him about it he doesn't seem to care. At this age should they start caring about stuff like that? He just seems to care about himself, I know kids are naturally self centered but when does this get better? He was more upset that daddy 'hurt his feelings' than the reason he caused daddy to be upset with him in the first place. I did ask him what was worse, his feelings being hurt or an animal being hurt. He thought about it and said animal. I don't know if he was just saying that because he knew that is what I wanted to hear??
Also, a few weeks ago DH caught him trying to smash a bee with his plastic bat.
My understanding is that for every year they are supposed to have 10% impulse control. So if he's supposed to have 50, it seems way less than that! I would guess 20-30% right now. With anything, not just the bunnies.
I also have a really hard time figuring out natural consequences for this and other things. Unfortunately, at this point he cannot be alone in the backyard for a while, but other than that I'm not sure what to do.
We are supposed to go somewhere fun today and now DH doesn't want to go with and doesn't think DS should go either.