TTC after second trimester loss?

[MiaG]

I just wanted to see if there is anyone out there that is in a similar place TTC?  I'm not sure which forum I belong to.  Here's a little background:

I lost my son at 24 weeks 6 months ago - unexplained why his heart stopped and I was induced.  He was amazing and conceived the old fashioned way.

My DH and I have been trying for 7+ years, I'm now 36. Over the years we had several super early losses and one failed IUI and IVF. Our infertility was unexplained  - even though I have mild endometriosis.  The RE said we had a 1% chance to conceive on our own.  Our son was a miracle but yet I've always known we would have children & be parents. Maybe my vision wasn't complete enough to actually see a healthy pregnancy to term with living children.  Now the doctors say we aren't in the "infertile" bucket since we did conceive and have a good chance to again.  

We are TTC but I am conflicted and scared and certainly not as enthusiastic as I once was. I still want to be a mother - that hasn't changed - but I know have all these fears that are overwhelming.   I'm scared to postpone TTC any longer, scared we're running out of time, scared I'm still carrying all the baby weight, scared that I'm still depressed, anxious and struggling with grief every day, I'm scared that I'm not as "functional" as I used to be in the world and yet we are still TTC.

 I'm scared to deal with the monthly ups and downs again with TTC.  I'm even scared to get pregnant and to deal with all the fears of having another loss.  It's like I'm stuck - torn by the ache in my heart to have children, the ache in my heart in losing DS, and torn in the fear of losing another.  

[Jaimee]

  Welcome to MDC.  I am so sorry for your losses.  I am glad you came here for support!  You will likely find more women in your position by posting again in the Pregnancy Loss forum which also includes a TTC After Loss subforum.  You might also find helpful information and support in the Infertility forum (despite no longer being labeled "infertile").  There are many threads you can join for women in different age groups and at different places in the TTC journey.  Good luck mama. 

[proud2bemommy]

one loss doesnt mean your risk for more is higher you are most feritile after a loss hun so if you want to do it now might be the time