Shampoo without drama...is it possible?

[CI Mama]

Shampooing my 2-year-old's hair has become the craziest thing ever. She screams, resists, and puts up a huge fight. From the time I lean her back to get her hair wet, until her hair is combed. She hates having any water or suds on her face or neck and goes absolutely ballistic if anything water or soap touches her.

She has been through several cycles of really hating to have her hair washed & then being OK with it. I've tried lots of little games & distractions with her toy ducks, with making "soup" in the tub, singing songs, you name it. Now I just muscle through it. I've tried talking to her (outside of bath time) about how we could make shampooing less difficult for her. Her basic position is that she just doesn't ever want to wash her hair. She has long, thick hair for a kid her age, which doesn't help.

I'm seriously considering shaving her head or getting the shortest haircut we can get away with. I might even be talked into giving up on shampoo if someone can explain to me how that's not gross. But I'd rather find a way to get through shampoo time without the drama.

Any suggestions? What works with your toddler?

[konayossie]

No mama experience here, but I was the little girl with a long, thick head of hair who hated having it washed. I was absolutely terrified of water getting in my face--like we're talking I only took baths (no showers) till I was like 12.... My mom used to wash my hair in the kitchen sink. She'd have me lay down on the countertop with a towel up there for padding and just put my hair in. No chance of it getting in your face. Not sure if that'd help your DD or not. I know some people no-poo, but I don't know anything about that.

[Adaline'sMama]

My mom used to put it in a cool bottle and I liked that for awhile, but then I tried to drink it.

My grandma took me with her a few times to get her hair cut, and then she had an office chair that you could pump up high and she laid my head back on a towel like at the beauty shop and pretended that we were there. It was fun. We did that until I was almost 10.

[katelove]

Until very recently we used one of those hand-held shower heads which attach to the bath spout. I'd use that to wet her hair and rinse so she didn't need to lean back at all. I'd  just hold my hand on her forehead to stop the water running over her face.

In the last few days we've started using a 500ml plastic jar from the kitchen because she doesn't want the shower hose on the bath spout anymore.

When I was a child my mum would fold up a facewasher into a long, thick rectangle and get me to hold it to my forehead with both hands. It gave me something to do and stopped the water getting on my face.

[LadyCatherine185]

have you tried pouring a cup over her head rather than laying her back into the water? what about a shower instead of a bath?

my advice- cut her hair short(er) and just do it. Talk her through it, but just do it. My DS1 was the same way with teeth brushing, to the point that one of us had to lay on him while the other brushed his teeth each night, but it HAD TO be done. After about 6 months, he stopped resisting. It was hard, the worst part of the day by far.. but it is non-negotiable.

also, they do make a dry shampoo you could use a couple days a week to cut down on the amount of days you are washing her hair?

[weliveintheforest]

I found that swimming lessons helped my kids with their aversion to getting their faces wet.  I wouldn't say my 3 year old enjoys getting shampooed, but he tolerates it now.

[indigosky]

I also despised getting my hair washed -- mostly getting water on my face -- when I was a kid.

I find the easiest way for me to wash DD's hair is to be in the tub with her, and have her lean back on me -- we call it "the Mama Bed." I squeeze out a washcloth so it's as dry as I can get it (you could also save a small dry towel for this purpose) and hold that over her face, particularly tightly across her forehead so it will catch any drips. Then I pour water over her head using a cup. This has been working great through toddlerhood and into preschoolhood.

When I was a little older, I remember having my hair washed at the kitchen sink sometimes. My mom would fold a thick bath towel for me to rest my face on, and I'd lean my head forward (I guess I kneeled on a chair?) into the sink, with my face smushed into the towel. She'd use the kitchen sink sprayer. I remember that worked pretty well.

[LynnS6]

Umm.. I've got a 10 year old who still mildly freaks out. (OK, he's got sensory issues...) He's a ton better than when he was 2, but at 2, hair washing was horrendous.

Things that help:

Shampoo visors like this: http://www.onestepahead.com/catalog/product.jsp?productId=536715&cmSource=Search (but my child has never smiled like the one in the picture!)

A handheld shower attachment for the tub spout. This better than a cup because I can direct the flow better and really keep it away from his face.

A wash cloth to hold over his eyes while I spray him.

Quick steps with breaks. Ds stops breathing when water is coming over him, so he starts to hyperventilate. So, I spray a bit, give him a chance to catch his breath, and spray more.

Short hair (it really helps that he's a boy who likes to keep his hair relatively short). For a girl, I'd do a nice chin length bob.

Resigning myself to getting splashed and screamed at.

Washing hair every 2 weeks.

I could not lay my child back because it would freak him out more. And alas, swimming lessons didn't help either. He's 10. He still refuses to get his face wet in the pool. He has no body fat, so he'll be wearing a PDF until he's 30 because he'll sink like a rock in any water.

[CI Mama]

These are great suggestions! Thanks for weighing in, everyone!

Last night before bathtime I asked her how we could make shampooing work better for her. She said "Cover me with leaves & sprouts."

[cyclamen]

Originally Posted by CI Mama 

These are great suggestions! Thanks for weighing in, everyone!

Last night before bathtime I asked her how we could make shampooing work better for her. She said "Cover me with leaves & sprouts."

LOL!

[Birdie B.]

We have the same problem, off and on, with our 2.5 year old.  We weren't washing it very often, but it's getting long, and it's so curly that it needs some attention! It seems like increasing the frequency has helped some (we were washing it once a week or less, now it's 2-3x/week).  I had been just muscling through it, but we were both miserable. It really helps when we take her in the shower; she likes to lean her head back under the running water.  In the bath I wet her hair with the washcloth/my hand and rinse it the same way - yes that takes forever, but she doesn't mind as much.  I hope she'll grow out of it soon!

[CI Mama]

Update: DD got a haircut this weekend, which has been AWESOME. She loves the cut, we cut off a good 3-4 inches, and now she has a cute chin-length bob. Washing & combing is sooooooooo much easier!

I've had some success with getting her to hold a washcloth over her eyes while I do the shampoo. I think it helps that she can't see me coming at her with the water. Plus it gives her something to do with her hands.

Progress!

[luckymamaoftwo]

My DD always screamed when it was time to wash her hair, too. It was a battle for sure so I totally empathize!

What's worked for us:

We wash hair only twice a week (I find that it just doesn't "need' to be washed more) and that has helped ease her anxiety of having to go through a washing every bath.

It's silly but it works for DD..I made up what I call a "Water Blocker"; a dry washcloth right at her hairline, covering her eyes and face. With her head tilted back just a bit, we're able to wash and rinse her hair fine without water or suds dripping into her eyes or face. The Water Blocker does catch any wayward drips if necessary.