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What do you do that cancels our your NFL/AP/CRUNCHY/NON-Mainstream/MDCness? - Page 7

post #121 of 468
Thread Starter 

I will say it again.  I DO NOT ADVOCATE CIRCING.  Sheesh.  I also said I smoke, but I dont see anyone assuming that I think everyone should smoke. 

 

My story.  I do not have a penis and my husband does.  My husband and his brothers are all circed.  I had enough hoops to jump through with all the vaxing research and decisions I was making that I let my husband make the decision about what to do with our sons penises.  Thats all.  I would bet a kajillion dollars that if I opened that pandoras box, I would be appalled at what I find, as would my husband, and any future children we bare would be left intact.  Ive already planted the seed after we watched a show on TLC one night.  A man was trying to regnerate his foreskin, and some numbers were thrown out about how many men in the US and other countries were actually living with forskin.  My husband was amazed, as every man he has ever known is cut.  (atleast to the best of his knowledge ;)

 

The end.

post #122 of 468



 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dar View Post



Quote:
Originally Posted by AFWife View Post





 
 And I guess I don't get the point of a thread to list the non AP/NPL stuff people do - it almost feels like people are trying to rebel against.... something. AP/NPL? Are people looking for high-5s or something for refusing to be AP/NFL in certain areas? I find myself nonplussed...


Glad i'm not the only one.

 

It seems to me there is some rebeling and catty-ness but it kinda feels like it is coming from the side that is protesting MDC so much.  I dunno, it never really occured to me to come to MDC to find friends, I just kinda come for the advice I need and then go about my life.
 

 

post #123 of 468


In case it wasn't clear my responses weren't towards you if you meant that towards me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Charlie's~Angel~ View Post

I will say it again.  I DO NOT ADVOCATE CIRCING.  Sheesh.  I also said I smoke, but I dont see anyone assuming that I think everyone should smoke. 

 

My story.  I do not have a penis and my husband does.  My husband and his brothers are all circed.  I had enough hoops to jump through with all the vaxing research and decisions I was making that I let my husband make the decision about what to do with our sons penises.  Thats all.  I would bet a kajillion dollars that if I opened that pandoras box, I would be appalled at what I find, as would my husband, and any future children we bare would be left intact.  Ive already planted the seed after we watched a show on TLC one night.  A man was trying to regnerate his foreskin, and some numbers were thrown out about how many men in the US and other countries were actually living with forskin.  My husband was amazed, as every man he has ever known is cut.  (atleast to the best of his knowledge ;)

 

The end.



 

post #124 of 468
Quote:
Originally Posted by dauphinette View Post



I had a UC Ldavis, lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Sorry, that cracked me up and I don't know why...............Um, but that is a very specific sub-board and if you don't want a UC, aren't going to have UC and don't like the idea of UC then you don't really ever have to read that board.....but I'm talking about the more common boards here on MDC where moms that are more middle of the road would have reason to hang out.  I don't really hang out on sub-boards that aren't pertaining to subjects that have to do directly with my life/interests.

 

 


Ok, I'm not really surprised by that.

 


Edited by Ldavis24 - 6/15/11 at 5:29pm
post #125 of 468

I drive a Jeep Cherokee and I can't wait for school to start!

 

(I love time with my kids, but right now I just drive them one place and then another and then another. I like just walking them to school and them doing interesting things there FOR HOURS without me having to take them to different locations)

 

PS: neither of my kids is circ'd, but they are both girls so I don't know if I get points for that

post #126 of 468



 

Quote:
Originally Posted by jezebelle View Post

I don't understand why people are upset about this thread.

 

I see it much the same way I would see a thread about "cheating" on a weight loss board.

 

People on weight loss boards often post about the chocolate bar they ate that ruined their calorie count, and they get empathy because everyone makes mistakes and they are still trying.

 

That's how I see this thread.  As a sort of, "sure, we all aren't perfect, and here is how I am not perfect, but at least we are trying to be more natural, so we are still okay, now let's all have a group hug" type of thread.

 

If we didn't support AP/NFL, we would just leave MDC.

 

No one here is advocating anything against the TOS (at least that I have seen), so if you don't like the thread, how about you just stop reading it and let the rest of us get some things off our chests.  It makes us feel better about ourselves and our efforts to be crunchy, and that in turn allows us to be better parents and not give up AP/NFL because we see it as just too hard to be perfect.


No, I don't really see it that way at all.  I don't see these lists as confessions, I haven't really seen any of the moms making them saying that they feel bad about these choices.

And who are you to say that other MDCers cant read this thread or oppose it?

I agree with a pp that this would be better as a find-your-tribe thing and not an open thread on the parenting (NFL parenting I might add) board.
 

 

post #127 of 468

Oh the horrros....now your Crunchy card is going to be taken away.

 

Dogma is silly.


When I see kids on the playgound I can't say whose mom was HB, CS, UC, had an epidural or not. Who co-slept and who did not. Who ahd strolelr and who had a sling. Who eat organic and who is not. Who watches TV and who is Waldorf.

 

I can  see whose mom drunk a lot whiel pregnant or whose daddy beats mommy.

 

Being a good  parent is not the same is checking every item on some "perfect Cruncky, Tiget Mother or what not " checklist.

 

 

post #128 of 468
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alenushka View Post

Being a good  parent is not the same is checking every item on some "perfect Cruncky, Tiget Mother or what not " checklist.


I agree with your post, but had to crack up at "Cruncky Tiget Mother" -- I love it! ROTFLMAO.gif

 

post #129 of 468
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ldavis24 View Post

I like that posting how you think this thread sucks just basically proves some of the points made here in this thread.



nod.gif

post #130 of 468


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by dauphinette View Post



 


No, I don't really see it that way at all.  I don't see these lists as confessions, I haven't really seen any of the moms making them saying that they feel bad about these choices.

And who are you to say that other MDCers cant read this thread or oppose it?

I agree with a pp that this would be better as a find-your-tribe thing and not an open thread on the parenting (NFL parenting I might add) board.
 

 

 

 

Except that there is no requirement that every member do all things in their life AP/NFL/whatever.  So, of course, unless you are the perfect (extreme) natural family living parent, you are going to be able to list several things that you don't happen to include in your life.  Whether it's by choice - such as using flushable toilet paper... or necessity - such as a c-section.  All those differences are what makes the world (and message boards like MDC) an interesting place.  If we all conformed and did everything the same, it would be pretty damn lame. 

 

 

Our ideals are all the same - raise happy, healthy children. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And I wish I had a Hummer, so there.  orngtongue.gif
 

 

post #131 of 468


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by dauphinette View Post



 


No, I don't really see it that way at all.  I don't see these lists as confessions, I haven't really seen any of the moms making them saying that they feel bad about these choices.

And who are you to say that other MDCers cant read this thread or oppose it?

I agree with a pp that this would be better as a find-your-tribe thing and not an open thread on the parenting (NFL parenting I might add) board.
 

 



Trust me, I think most of us are aware that there are people who will oppose this. Six months ago this thread would have been deleted in the first five minutes. It shouldn't be allowed as an open thread? Yes, wouldn't want to pollute the perfect waters. nut.gif

post #132 of 468
Quote:
Originally Posted by dauphinette View Post

 I don't see these lists as confessions, I haven't really seen any of the moms making them saying that they feel bad about these choices.

 


I've actually agreed with a lot of what you've said dauphinette, but if it seems like no moms are feeling bad about choices they've confessed, I think that is because you're right.  Nobody is feeling bad about any of the choices they've made and posted here.  Because--I am assuming, the choices have been made because it is what works for each of us.  It is more of a "I'm confessing that I am not actually perfect instead of hiding behind the facade that I believe in every single thing posted on MDC and also have the resources and energy to practice is."  I like this thread for that.  I don't want all of MDC to be one big confession of "it turns out I'm really not crunchy at all", though.  I still love MDC for what it stood for when I joined, but it is nice once in a while to admit we're all not perfect and not feel guilty about it.  We are all human after all.   
 

 

post #133 of 468
Quote:
Originally Posted by dauphinette View Post



 


No, I don't really see it that way at all.  I don't see these lists as confessions, I haven't really seen any of the moms making them saying that they feel bad about these choices.

And who are you to say that other MDCers cant read this thread or oppose it?

I agree with a pp that this would be better as a find-your-tribe thing and not an open thread on the parenting (NFL parenting I might add) board.
 

 

Maybe because the moms do NOT feel bad about the particular choices they have made.  I find parenthood to be a constant ebb and flow.  They exit one stage and enter another.  What worked for one child within a family does not work for the next.  How many of us had wonderful, easy, go-with-the-flow, smiley first babies that serenely nursed to sleep and slept with mommy all night long and just patted ourselves on the back for our Mad Parenting Skillz...this is so easy, do this and your life is easy.  Then, the next child is so the opposite:  strong-willed, insists on sleeping a-l-o-n-e and needs to fuss a minute or two before sleeping (and how many of us will rock that child for hours, when he can be put down and be asleep within 5-10 minutes), then will wake at 7, breakfast at 7:30, nap at 10, lunch at 11:30--you know, you must keep the schedule to the minute or you are dealing with the wrath of the baby.  What works for one family does not work for the next.
And, I do get a lot out of MDC, which is why I keep coming back and participating in the community.  And, sometimes I think some moms are so "invested" in the "AP Checklist", that they don't want to admit something does not work (think the baby that hates co-sleeping and mommy had been looking so forward to it, or when breastfeeding does not work out, or mom planned a peaceful UC only to end up in the hospital for an emergency c-section, or due to whatever reasons--economy/finances, husband loses job and can't find another, he gets disabled, he leaves, she just plain likes her job, mom has to make the decision to return to work,  partner does not support AP/NFL.)
 

 

post #134 of 468



 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Drummer's Wife View Post


 

 

 

Except that there is no requirement that every member do all things in their life AP/NFL/whatever.  So, of course, unless you are the perfect (extreme) natural family living parent, you are going to be able to list several things that you don't happen to include in your life.  Whether it's by choice - such as using flushable toilet paper... or necessity - such as a c-section.  All those differences are what makes the world (and message boards like MDC) an interesting place.  If we all conformed and did everything the same, it would be pretty damn lame. 

 

 

Our ideals are all the same - raise happy, healthy children. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And I wish I had a Hummer, so there.  orngtongue.gif
 

 



Want to drive a Hummer?  Join the Army--they have plenty.  :lol

 

post #135 of 468

I love epidurals!  LOVE them!  I use disposable diapers and I do not like to baby wear.  I need my space.  Out and about I would but around the house...no.

post #136 of 468
Quote:
Originally Posted by dauphinette View Post



 


No, I don't really see it that way at all.  I don't see these lists as confessions, I haven't really seen any of the moms making them saying that they feel bad about these choices.

And who are you to say that other MDCers cant read this thread or oppose it?

I agree with a pp that this would be better as a find-your-tribe thing and not an open thread on the parenting (NFL parenting I might add) board.
 

 



Please read the quote again.  I didn't say you "can't" do anything.  I am suggesting that you do the same thing you are saying you do and stay out of areas you aren't interested in.  If you are so opposed to going against the NFL grain, why are you in this thread??  If you can't contribute to the conversation we are having, why are you posting?

 

post #137 of 468

I have to laugh at how the most random threads turn into crazy debates! 

 

Anyway:

We used regular diapers (and wrapped the poopy ones in plastic grocery bags!) and I can't see myself cloth-anything.

I let my kid play with toy guns--and got called out because my views weren't MDC-enough or whatever...

We eat a lot of crap but we do try to balance it out with good stuff.

Basically tons of what other people have said but my brain is too fried to think of things right now. 

Oh, and I can't stand the word "crunchy" as an adjective.

 

 

 

post #138 of 468

I am really learning a lot from this thread.  I had no idea that using toys was considered against natural parenting.  I guess they have to be made of wood?  Which kind of makes me wonder what people who are against plastic toys feed their babies with?  Wooden spoons?  Wooden bowls?  Do they all cook in wooden pots, too?  I'm not being sarcastic, I am genuinely intrigued by people that don't sit their babies in anything plastic all day.  I am kind of confused by some of it, but at least I have learned that these topics are touchy.  wink1.gif

post #139 of 468

Yes, you coudl tell all these "mainstreamers" at MDC to go away and find themselves a mainstream board.

 

But the fact is, there are differences of opinion about what is "mainstream," and what constitutes "AP" and what constitutes "natural living."  And invariably, people who come here for one thing (breastfeeding advice, or natural childbirth advice, or sleeping without CIO advice) run into people who have little checklists in their heads about "THE ONE WAY TO DO THIS."

 

So the person who wants advice on breastfeeding posts a generic question, and gets jumped on for being a big, mean, mother-led weaner.  "Don't Ask Don't Refuse is a weaning technique, mama!"   A person who posts about having weaned might get told that all her child's issues are due to that and she should relactate.   People asking for advice on potty training get told that even their cloth diapers are abusive and REAL AP parents are all into EC now.    

 

All these practices exist on a continuum, and it seems like often, there's a vocal minority at one end of the continuum, berating people, as though the object of being at MDC is to urge people on, like lemmings, off the edge of the world.  From Breast is Best, to "Aim for 2 years," to "let them decide when to wean."  From "Unmedicated labor is healthiest for the baby," to "Homebirth is the only way to have a good birth," to "Any birth attendant is unnatural!"      From "Spanking is wrong," to "Timeouts are bad," to "Saying no is harmful," to "expressing any opinion on your child's behavior is manipulative behaviorism."  From "public schools aren't very invidualistic," to "Homeschool so you're never separated from your kids," to "parents even suggesting books to kids destroys their intellectual development."

 

And there's always someone waiting in the wings to tell someone who they perceive as "behind" them on each of those paths that they're doing it wrong.   A lot of people can't accept that not everyone *wants* to push every aspect of this to the ultimate limit, and that for many people, that extreme position is *not* the best for their family, health, or community.

 

For the record:

I mother-led weaned both my kids, one at 18 months, the second at 2.

I used a pacifier with one of my kids.

I am in love with both the concept of Free Appropriate Public Education *and* the way it is executed in my home town.

I birthed med-free in the hospital with CNMs.  Despite that, I had a full-on Odent-style FER, in which my 10-pounder fell out of me in one contraction.   Hah.

I vaccinate.  yes, I've done the research.  For real.   

I think GMOs are probably going to be necessary to feed the growing world population.

My kids went to daycare and I'm not ashamed of that fact, nor do I think working is incompatible with raising attached children.

post #140 of 468
Quote:
Originally Posted by savithny View Post

Yes, you coudl tell all these "mainstreamers" at MDC to go away and find themselves a mainstream board.

 

But the fact is, there are differences of opinion about what is "mainstream," and what constitutes "AP" and what constitutes "natural living."  And invariably, people who come here for one thing (breastfeeding advice, or natural childbirth advice, or sleeping without CIO advice) run into people who have little checklists in their heads about "THE ONE WAY TO DO THIS."

 

So the person who wants advice on breastfeeding posts a generic question, and gets jumped on for being a big, mean, mother-led weaner.  "Don't Ask Don't Refuse is a weaning technique, mama!"   A person who posts about having weaned might get told that all her child's issues are due to that and she should relactate.   People asking for advice on potty training get told that even their cloth diapers are abusive and REAL AP parents are all into EC now.    

 

All these practices exist on a continuum, and it seems like often, there's a vocal minority at one end of the continuum, berating people, as though the object of being at MDC is to urge people on, like lemmings, off the edge of the world.  From Breast is Best, to "Aim for 2 years," to "let them decide when to wean."  From "Unmedicated labor is healthiest for the baby," to "Homebirth is the only way to have a good birth," to "Any birth attendant is unnatural!"      From "Spanking is wrong," to "Timeouts are bad," to "Saying no is harmful," to "expressing any opinion on your child's behavior is manipulative behaviorism."  From "public schools aren't very invidualistic," to "Homeschool so you're never separated from your kids," to "parents even suggesting books to kids destroys their intellectual development."

 

And there's always someone waiting in the wings to tell someone who they perceive as "behind" them on each of those paths that they're doing it wrong.   A lot of people can't accept that not everyone *wants* to push every aspect of this to the ultimate limit, and that for many people, that extreme position is *not* the best for their family, health, or community.

 

For the record:

I mother-led weaned both my kids, one at 18 months, the second at 2.

I used a pacifier with one of my kids.

I am in love with both the concept of Free Appropriate Public Education *and* the way it is executed in my home town.

I birthed med-free in the hospital with CNMs.  Despite that, I had a full-on Odent-style FER, in which my 10-pounder fell out of me in one contraction.   Hah.

I vaccinate.  yes, I've done the research.  For real.   

I think GMOs are probably going to be necessary to feed the growing world population.

My kids went to daycare and I'm not ashamed of that fact, nor do I think working is incompatible with raising attached children.



I...I think I love you.

 

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