What do you do that cancels our your NFL/AP/CRUNCHY/NON-Mainstream/MDCness? - Page 4

[Alyantavid]

My kids are fully vaxed.

They go to public school.

I work full time so they both started being watched by a sitter at 6 weeks.

They both had to be supplemented with formula.

We go to McDonald's sometimes.

We used disposable diapers.

We watch tv and play video games.

I had 2 hospital births attended by an ob.

My kids have had many rounds of antibiotics, my oldest was on asthma meds for a long time.

I drive an SUV.

I refuse to use family cloth or mama cloth or whatever all those cloth things that are so popular on here.  Give me tampons and toilet paper!

[sosurreal09]

Everyone just tries to be the best parents they can be...I am pretty crunchy but we watch tv and we CD full time b/c of the $$$ not really the environment.

I have no issue with people having a rant thread on why they aren't "AP" enough but non of these things seem non-AP to me. Attachment Parenting has nothing to do with recycling....

I do feel compelled to say that hitting a child, FF a 10 m/o (!!!), and being pro-circ don't make you not "AP". I'm not going to say what I feel they are b/c I don't need to get flamed...

Especially circ. A lot of people can be AP parents and have a circ'ed child. I can't imagine why anyone would want to do that to a child and I am completely against it but you aren't crunchy for having an intact child. Plenty of mainstream parents have intact children...can't we leave babie's genitals out of it?

[Phoenix~Mama]

Originally Posted by sosurreal09 

Everyone just tries to be the best parents they can be...I am pretty crunchy but we watch tv and we CD full time b/c of the $$$ not really the environment.

I have no issue with people having a rant thread on why they aren't "AP" enough but non of these things seem non-AP to me. Attachment Parenting has nothing to do with recycling....

I do feel compelled to say that hitting a child, FF a 10 m/o (!!!), and being pro-circ don't make you not "AP". I'm not going to say what I feel they are b/c I don't need to get flamed...

Especially circ. A lot of people can be AP parents and have a circ'ed child. I can't imagine why anyone would want to do that to a child and I am completely against it but you aren't crunchy for having an intact child. Plenty of mainstream parents have intact children...can't we leave babie's genitals out of it?

And there is an interesting point....  I really feel this is a personal decision to the person.  This is such a flame war discussion... and so many strong opinions on BOTH sides.

Just because a person reads ALL the research presented on BOTH sides and comes to a different decision than you... does not make them a child abuser or a non-AP, or even a bad parent. 

*shrugs*  Just my not so humble opinion on that whole can of worms....

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

I just want to go on the record as stating I am NOT pro circ. 

Thank you.  Please continue. 

[APToddlerMama]

Wow.  This is apparently a really touchy topic.  I was happy this thread was started and jumped right in, but it seems like people are taking it all way too seriously and getting offended.  When I joined MDC, all my friends were mainstream and I was so thrilled to find a place where there were other crunchy mamas.  There is no way I'm ever going to homeschool, unschool, eat my placenta, UC, or breastfeed past three, but the fact that those are encouraged and supported on these boards never left me feeling like I wasn't crunchy enough or like I didn't belong here.  I take what I like, and leave the rest.  I don't let a stranger on the internet convince me I'm a bad mom for falling off the cloth diaper wagon, not breastfeeding long enough, or putting my kid in timeout.  I'm probably somewhere in the middle as far as how crunchy I am and maybe more mainstream compared to other MDC mamas, but I am still really disappointed that MDC is turning as mainstream as it is. 

This is the one and only place I come to be supported in any of my AP/NFL decisions and I'd like that to continue.  I don't want to come here and be told to formula feed my kid or let him cry it out.  If I go that route, fine--I know I'm not a terrible mother, but I have always come here to be encouraged to try to do the AP/NFL thing, even if I determine I can't do it or it isn't best for our family.  I get that a lot of the backlash is from people who have been spanked over the years for not doing things "right" and I have in fact been spanked myself, but that isn't who MDC is anymore.  I think there is plenty of space for balanced conversation and a lot fewer spankings while still encouraging each other in whatever NFL/AP choices we have made.  I never go to the homeschool board because I'm not pro-homeschooling.  I don't want to steer anyone else away from it though and I am seeing a lot more posts trying to steer people towards mainstream.  Let this board continue to be a place where NFL/AP and eating your placenta is supported. 

[ramama]

Yesterday, my kids wanted Little Debbie Oatmeal cream pies (lol, creampies ) with whipped cream on top.  CANNED whipped cream.  And I LET them!  For BREAKFAST.

We don't eat organic produce.  Simply cannot afford them.  But we do mostly eat fresh (except for the oatmeal cream pie extravagance LOL)

I yell.  I scream.  I curse.

My kids were born in a hospital (gasp), DD1 was induced (double gasp), and I had an epidural with DD1 as well (holy crap!).  And get this...I don't care!  I don't give two figs about how my children came into the world.  So there!

Both girls had pacifiers, although both gave them up on their own around 6 months.

DD1 self-weaned at 3.5 years, and DD2 self-weaned at 4 years, but when I was thinning their baby food...I used formula to thin it, not breastmilk.  You know, since I had the sample can and pumping never worked for me.  OMG, that is the biggest confession EVER, for me.

DD1 started baby cereal at 4 months.  The hospital lactation consultant told me to.  My period came back and my supply dropped.  I know better now.  Ah, well...

DD2's first table food was pork and sauerkraut LOL.  Not really non-AP, but I thought it was funny.  She was about 11.5 months old.

The kids watch TV.  Pretty much whenever they want to.  Meh.

Homeschooling sounds like hell to me.

My kids are punished, rewarded, and praised.

[AFWife]

Originally Posted by Dar 

I've been here a looong time - pre-crash, even - and I've never felt like I shouldn't be here because I don't do enough crunchy stuff. I think maybe people feel more judged than they really are? I guess I think people who are judging others often do that because they feel insecure about their own choices, and they feel more secure if they can tell themselves that they're doing it right and other people are wrong. I just don't see much of that here, though, or maybe I don't pay it much mind. When it comes up I've always been pretty open about my choices to have a hospital birth, use disposable diapers, Western biomedicine, childcare , pacifiers, network TV, fast food, and so on... but I don't generally feel the need to bring stuff up out of context here.
 

I've seen many a thread where people will talk about unfriending people for some things...or entire threads devoted to making fun of some of the decisions we've listed. So no, I think that MDC can be quite catty.

[lovingmommyhood]

Originally Posted by AFWife 

I've seen many a thread where people will talk about unfriending people for some things...or entire threads devoted to making fun of some of the decisions we've listed. So no, I think that MDC can be quite catty.

I agree. 

[Ldavis24]

I support everyone's right to eat their placenta, just don't go waving your placenta in my face all "i'm gonna eat this, watch me do it!!" and we are good...

MDC can be super catty, pretending it is never like that is just willfully turning a blind eye to some of the bs around here. That doesn't negate that there is some really wonderful advice given here.

[AFWife]

Originally Posted by Ldavis24 

I support everyone's right to eat their placenta, just don't go waving your placenta in my face all "i'm gonna eat this, watch me do it!!" and we are good...

MDC can be super catty, pretending it is never like that is just willfully turning a blind eye to some of the bs around here. That doesn't negate that there is some really wonderful advice given here.

I will admit to posting photos of my placenta encapsulation on Facebook...but I just wanted to gross out my college buddies (I had to hear detailed stories of their sex lives and bodily functions...I finally got to win)

[Ldavis24]

Originally Posted by AFWife 

I will admit to posting photos of my placenta encapsulation on Facebook...but I just wanted to gross out my college buddies (I had to hear detailed stories of their sex lives and bodily functions...I finally got to win)

pictures I can handle...those are easy to distance yourself from..Raw placenta is just sooo....jiggly looking though...ugh
 

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

Forgot to mention I tell my kids "good Job".  ALOT. 

[Snowflake777]

Half the stuff listed here doesn't strike me as un-AP at all. It sounds like some misinformed, straw-man version of what mainstream-ers think AP is.

Part of being AP is having balance in your life. Not being superwoman doesn't cancel your AP-ness.

[AFWife]

Originally Posted by ~Charlie's~Angel~ 

Forgot to mention I tell my kids "good Job".  ALOT. 

Us too!!! :) 

[Dar]

Originally Posted by AFWife 

I've seen many a thread where people will talk about unfriending people for some things...or entire threads devoted to making fun of some of the decisions we've listed. So no, I think that MDC can be quite catty.

I guess I don't read those forums, then, maybe? I don't read a lot of little kid stuff anymore... I dunno, the few times I've seen something like that it always seems like most people post and say how silly it is to unfriend someone because she gives her toddler McD's fries or whatever. If we're talking about something like spanking, or shaming, or really seriously neglectful parenting like giving a 3 month old bottles of kool-aid... yeah, I could see that. But other stuff, not so much. And I guess I don't get the point of a thread to list the non AP/NPL stuff people do - it almost feels like people are trying to rebel against.... something. AP/NPL? Are people looking for high-5s or something for refusing to be AP/NFL in certain areas? I find myself nonplussed...

[Devaya]

Great thread!
I tried buying organic for a while but just can't afford it, so we now east 90 % non organic.

I use disposable nappies at night and sometimes non-Eco ones.

I buy Bleach occasionally, and have non-eco cleaning liquid.

I yell sometimes though I never intend to and am not proud of it!

DS eats sugar, dairy, meat and all sorts of things I didn't want him to mainly b/c his dad and grandparents don't share my views on food. And  I've relaxed about it too!
Other than that I'm pretty AP - but not because of trying to live up to a 'label', just b/c that's how things evolved for us as a family.

[Ldavis24]

Originally Posted by AFWife 

I will admit to posting photos of my placenta encapsulation on Facebook...but I just wanted to gross out my college buddies (I had to hear detailed stories of their sex lives and bodily functions...I finally got to win)

pictures I can handle...those are easy to distance yourself from..Raw placenta is just sooo....jiggly looking though...ugh
 

[mommy212]

to add to my earlier list:

I drive a hummer with leather seats and I love it

i have used time outs, and I have gotten up from trying to put little man to sleep to let him cry and get tired for 5-10 minutes while I collect myself

we own a lot of battery operated toys (which I hate but if I threw them out he would have very few toys) 

This is not an anti ap thing but we also eat lots of soy milk and other soy products!

[lovingmommyhood]

Originally Posted by Dar 

Originally Posted by AFWife 

I've seen many a thread where people will talk about unfriending people for some things...or entire threads devoted to making fun of some of the decisions we've listed. So no, I think that MDC can be quite catty.

I guess I don't read those forums, then, maybe? I don't read a lot of little kid stuff anymore... I dunno, the few times I've seen something like that it always seems like most people post and say how silly it is to unfriend someone because she gives her toddler McD's fries or whatever. If we're talking about something like spanking, or shaming, or really seriously neglectful parenting like giving a 3 month old bottles of kool-aid... yeah, I could see that. But other stuff, not so much. And I guess I don't get the point of a thread to list the non AP/NPL stuff people do - it almost feels like people are trying to rebel against.... something. AP/NPL? Are people looking for high-5s or something for refusing to be AP/NFL in certain areas? I find myself nonplussed...

What about the very recent thread that compared formula feeding to child abuse? Strollers and "bucket seats" have been deemed abusive more times than I care to count. It seems if you're not carrying your children everywhere you're looked down on as some sort of lazy schlub who just refuses to go that extra mile. Don't even get me started on ultrasounds..

I have actually noticed a shift around MDC lately toward being more inclusive and I don't think anything has been lost in it. There are still A LOT of moms that are hardcore AP/NFL and I guess I look at it as a learning experience for those who have never been exposed to such ideas.

When I came here back in 2006 the most crunchy thing I did was breastfeed. I was 20 years old and a new mom...I was very pro circ and I thought I would be a spanker and made an ass out of myself over it several times..but here I am, having my fourth baby who will be left in tact...because of MDC, soley. I never thought to question my doctors on vaccinating and now find myself somewhere in the middle on that issue. I guess what I'm trying to say is if you don't allow people like me in, or the old naive me, than what good are we really doing? Can't we support all mothers? Do you (the collective) really think that if you come here asking for advice and someone says "Just switch to formula" you're going to have no choice but to do so? There will be plenty of breastfeeding advice and beyond that I don't think anybody is saying MDC has to advocate for formula, but maybe just be more inclusive to those who chose it for whatever reason. 

I have actually loved my DDC as everybody there is very supportive of everybody else. It's been a great place for open sharing and support. A safe place to land, so to speak. 

I'll stop rambling now as my son just came up to show me that he made a smore out of legos...I mean, come on...if that's not a genius. 

[Adaline'sMama]

Originally Posted by mommy212 

to add to my earlier list:

I drive a hummer with leather seats and I love it

i have used time outs, and I have gotten up from trying to put little man to sleep to let him cry and get tired for 5-10 minutes while I collect myself

we own a lot of battery operated toys (which I hate but if I threw them out he would have very few toys) 

This is not an anti ap thing but we also eat lots of soy milk and other soy products!

Why? How can you love spending that much money on gas? 10 miles a gallon for what? What do you do that requires you to drive a vehicle that gets such low gas mileage and is polluting the environment that much?



ETA: Ive driven vehicles with low gas mileage before, but it was because they were old and all I could afford. I just cant imagine spend tens of thousands of dollars on a car that had terrible gas mileage.