My "the ex is getting married" thread

[NewMom0208]

Yep,

The ex is getting married and I have mixed feelings

I have been separated for 2.5 years, divorced for 9 months

And he is marrying the girl he cheated with for 2.5 years and she is younger than me, I'm pretier and smarter though. she looks like my overweight insecure younger sister. We do look alike...

And I know that doesnt really matter, but I cannot avoid to compare.

Do I care he is getting married? no. But it reminds me I am not even close!!

They are moving together in a month. Which means my son, who is 3 now will have two siblings and...another mom?

Geez, that is tough. I do pray she is loving and respectful to my son. Same with her kids. But it bothers me, when I delivered that little boy I was soupossed to be the only mommy in his world. But I guess a lot was soupossed to be different anyway.

I have never talked to her. I get along just fine with the ex when it comes to the kiddo and he is very involved. But who knows how will the dynamic change now. I pray I stay true to my values and make it about the kid and not about me.

I reminded him the divorce decree says our kid needs to sleep alone or with him. Not with somebody else, not even kids.

Thank you for listening.I think the news have not even sink in yet, i feel a little numb

[mrsjerrygarcia]

I can't imagine what you're feeling, but I hope she is kind and loving to your son!! I know this day will come some day for me, but it's not any time soon!

[BabyBearsMummy]

Originally Posted by NewMom0208 

she looks like my overweight insecure younger sister. We do look alike...

Have you ever wondered if maybe it is just this fact that draws him to her? Perhaps he feels much more secure with the heavier less secure version of you. Less worried she will see him for the man he really is and move on. 

9 months is not very long be gentle with yourself and allow time to digest the past, repair the damage and move on to better things yet unseen in your future.

Edited by BabyBearsMummy - 6/14/11 at 11:47pm

[doubledutch]

i know what you mean, about being "not even close" to that serious of a relationship, when he's already getting married.  it sucks.  i recently thought ex was moving in with his gf and i was like, "what?  i haven't even gone on a date!"  i wasn't jealous, but just felt a bit defective, like, why isn't anything happening in my love life yet?

it must also be hard to accept your ex's wife's role in your son's life.  she's not another mama though, really.  no one will ever take your place in his life.

[Ansley]

My ex is supposed to be getting married in october to the woman he cheated on me with. I am hoping he changes his mind but if not I hope that I can be able to look at things like you are doing. I care that he is getting married and wish he would come back to us. Hope everything turns out good for you.