3 y/o DD refuses to pick up toys ...

[MariesMama]

I know that this isn't so much a "discipline" thing, but I'm at my wits' end with a living room full of toys!  I have asked DD to pick up her toys several times, and she will either say "okay" and not do it, or flat out refuse.  What tips/tricks/tools do you mamas recommend?

(I would love to throw them all in the trash at this point, but some of them are rather expensive.)

[Susan Kunkel]

I read in another board this idea. Only put out the amount of toys you are willing to clean up. SO if 5 is your limit you give her 5 to play with.

As she gets older and starts putting toys away she gets more. The mom on the other board said her teenager has the freedom to play with all his toys .He has learn to put them away. He toddlers have not so they are limited .

[MariesMama]

I do like that idea, but what do you do if the toys are accessible at all times?  We have bins in the living room.  If I tell her "put one away before you get out another," she flat out won't do it and will just go do something else. 

(I want magic, basically.  A magical spell to make my DD's toys put themselves away without yelling or time outs or putting them all in the basement.)

[Jenni1894]

Make it a game.   Who can pick up more toys...you or her. 

Sing a song while doing it.  

But if you can figure out a magical spell, please share it with me b/c it sure would make things easier!!! lol 

[skreader]

Suggestions

1) Reduce number of toys available for her to play with (box some and put them away), some people call it "toy cycling". Or just throw some away.

2) Help her put them away (she's only 3, so she will need some help). Or, like PP, make it a game (30 second tidy!).

3) Be firm and consistent that toys get put away BEFORE (insert activity). The old "First we put away the toys, then we eat lunch". Or "First we put away the toys, then we go out to play". "First we put away the toys, then mama will read the story to you."

4) Make sure there are shelves/space where she can put the toys away herself.

[elisheva]

I'm 9 mo pregnant and had previously done all the clean-up myself because it took too much energy to get the kids to do more than a token clean up...but now I can't bend over so someone suggested this to me. It's still time-consuming, but I think worth it as the kids get used to putting things where they belong...

I sweep all the toys into a pile (often there is misc clothing, items from the recycling bin, kitchen utensils they were playing with, etc...) and tell the kids we're going to play a "running game". I'll tell them something to put away and where to put it and they run to do it...It's not magic and takes follow (i.e. I have to supervise constantly) through but that's par for the course in the age range I have. The kids don't seem to mind it too much though I wouldn't say they beg to play the running game.... And my floor gets clean. 

We also have a designated playroom where *most* of the toys live in big bins. I don't sort most stuff - someone once told me that people are very motivated to search for an item they want but are seldom motivated to file it back in it's specific place...so big bins it is. We have one bin (large laundry basket) upstairs for the toys and a few item-specific bins (lego, blocks, puzzles). 

Not magic, but livable mostly.

[SquidMommy]

Store everything in Super Extra Large bins - Rubbermaid makes some that are the bees' knees. Then:

I've seen this trick used to keep tubs and bins shut on plane flights:

Use a hole punch/awl to make two holes - one in each handle or side of the bins. Zip-tie one hole, so it functions like a hinge. For the other hole, use a locking clip or some type of tie or latch your kiddo doesn't have the dexterity to open. Allow out only the number of toys your child is capable of putting away solo. Once those toys are out, clip the bins shut. If your sweetie wants another toy out, she has to come get you - which means you can enforce a "one in, one out" policy, praise her for being helpful, and help her choose things she's capable of putting away. (I work with kids: they LOVE taking out big projects, but struggle to put all the itty bitty component parts away when they're done. Are all of her toys things that a child her age can REALISTICALLY put away on her own?)

As she shows more ability to self-regulate with toys and projects, allow more "unclipped" access to the bins. If she backslides, decrease unclipped time and make sure she understands why.

It works where I work, ymmv.